Today, I received my first negative feedback on my otherwise flawless eBay record. The woman who bought the item said it wasn't as delicious as she was expecting, so there must be something wrong with it. What was I selling? A new and unopened lipstick. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I received a letter from an eBay seller for whom I recently left an honest, negative review. I don't know what I was expecting, but I certainly wasn't ready for what spilled out coating my jeans, shoes, and brand new carpet: Glitter. FML
Today, a customer tried to return some pricey lingerie. She said she didn't have the packaging, but had never worn them. The skidmark I accidentally touched begged to differ. FML
Today, at my job in a cosmetics department, I was helping a customer find something to her taste. She said, "I want a lipstick like yours. Something that says, 'I'm a bitch'." FML
Today, the lip balms I ordered online finally arrived in the mail. After trying one out, my lips had an allergic reaction. It's a 4-pack. FML
Today, I brought a cupcake to school for my friend's birthday. After taking one bite, she exclaimed that it was the worst thing she had ever tasted and that we should sue the store that I bought it from. I baked it myself. FML
Today, I accidentally posted an extensive, negative review of the gynecologist I visited earlier this week. I messed up and posted it from my work's customer service email, so now it looks like the large, well-known company I work for had a poor gynecological experience. FML
Today, a lady stormed into the pharmacy I work at and chewed me out because the medicine I sold her the day before gave her horrible diarrhea as a "side effect". I checked, and it was the medicine she asked for - laxatives. FML
Today, I was shopping when a woman stopped me and asked me what lipgloss I was wearing because my lips looked gorgeous. I had to explain to her it was just the grease from the Slim Jim I had just eaten. FML
Today, I learned the horrifying implications of my memory not being what it used to be when I bought a tasty-looking chocolate bar, only to realize upon taking a bite that I'd bought one before and not liked it one bit. FML
Today, I sold yet another £100 bottle of lotion to a stuck-up teenage fashionista with less brain-power than the yapping bastard of a dog she carried in her arms. She did nothing but brag the whole time about her jewelry, and openly mocked me for only making minimum wage. FML
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Top comments
Tempest559 12
She must like to wear it on her teeth like my grandma does too.
daydreamer244 13
Well what flavor was it?
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Comments (150)
SomeAnonymousBro 4
So tell me..why the hell are you selling Chapstick on eBay??
HeartOfLead 24
Wait, lipstick is not edible? What has this world come to?!
LavenderLunacy14 7
...Pica much? (eating disorder where you have the urge to eat strange non-food items; such as soap, laundry detergent, clay, rocks, etc.)...
rjp1811 0
eBAY has become an absolutely re-dick-ulous outlet to sell anything!! I would bet my left ********, right kidney and $100 that you not only get the "username reputation killing" NEGATIVE but u also end up having to refund this obviously in-breds money back. All because eBAY protects only the buyer now and unless u want to stop using eBAY u end up having to bend over and take the BIG one while stilllllll not being able to dispute the negative. oh, lets not forget that you'll be getting a (what I assume) a chewed up lipstick that u cnt sell!!! what the flying FU#$ is wrong with these ppl???
Subtext 10
Isn't it possible to get obviously stupid feedback removed? I'm not using ebay much, but if I recall right, my mother managed to get two negative feedbacks removed after the buyers never answered any mails and never paid. And this one is even easier to prove... That was some time ago, though...
AwsumShyGuy 12
Give her a pair of secretly used deodorant.
NoReservations 9
What an impudent women. What type of food could a tube of lipstick POSSIBLY resemble?
spainstateofmind 5
OP sold lipstick to Terezi?
jayellef 3
Who sells lipstick on eBay? That's so strange
austin101123 3
What the ****! You aren't supposed eat the lipstick!