Work: Today, I received a mass email from my boss saying we had a position...

By jcstpierre - 24/04/2009 10:41 - United States

Today, I received a mass email from my boss saying we had a position open at the daycare I work at. I knew my boyfriend was looking for a job so I insisted he apply. Later at work, my boss takes me into her office and tells me my employment is being "terminated". My boyfriend is replacing me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 493

You deserved it 5 570

Work

Good kid

BO Central

Kitten time

Outlaw

By me_the_maniak - 12/01/2012 10:14 - India

Today, my parents want me to become a lawyer, all because our family members keep getting into feuds and court cases. I'm a successful developer, and run my own company. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 733

You deserved it 2 432

By Anonymous - 28/09/2009 16:28 - United States

Today, I was introduced to friends of my boyfriend as "My other girlfriend." FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 626

You deserved it 4 070

By amberrenee91 - 19/03/2013 03:29 - United States - Ellwood City

Today, a cute guy who works at the mall winked at me. When I met up with my boyfriend, I bragged to him about it. His response was, "Don't flatter yourself, he winked at me too." FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 497

You deserved it 17 779

By hulio88 - 07/12/2010 00:37

Today, after years of hard work, I had an interview at the highest ranking university in the world 800 miles from where I live. It snowed heavily for the last 2 days closing every road, railway, and airport causing me to miss the interview. There is no rescheduling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 517

You deserved it 2 691

By Heather - 04/03/2010 12:49 - United Kingdom

Today, I was quite happily glossing my new bathroom door, when my useless, alcoholic, housemate came rolling in, knocked the paint over, stood in it and without realising, walked it all the way down the stairs. I had just had a brand new carpet fitted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 157

You deserved it 3 668

By why mom, why? - 12/06/2013 04:59 - United States - Ross

Today, my mother threw away my brand new headphones. She saw them on the couch with duct tape on the wires and assumed they were "old, broken, and cheap." I put the tape there to avoid damaging the wires. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 548

You deserved it 14 316

By Anonymous - 24/11/2013 23:19 - Canada - Surrey

Today, while riding the subway, I fell asleep. I awoke to find that someone had stolen my glasses. From off my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 139

You deserved it 7 777

By arrestedgun - 23/05/2009 07:37 - Canada

Today, I went to a dollar store with a couple friends to buy cap guns to play with. We were having a lot of fun with them, and took them onto a bus. 5 minutes later, three cops got on, handcuffed us, and sternly talked to us about the dangers of guns. We got arrested for toy guns. We are 17. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 348

You deserved it 58 528

By Anonymous - 13/07/2012 06:47 - United States - Spring

Today, my fiancé's grandmother kept trying to introduce him to this "simply absolutely amazing girl," who she thought "would be just the perfect date" for him. At our engagement party. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 585

You deserved it 1 998

By ToiletProblems - 06/02/2019 07:00 - United States - Northbrook

Today, I decided to use the disabled toilet in work to get a little extra privacy while I did my business. The cleaners who unlocked the door from the outside and barged in on me were nice and waited until I finished to apologize and explain there were complaints the door had been locked for days. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 038

You deserved it 443

By Anonymous - 08/04/2009 10:26 - United States

Today, I made the mistake of sneezing in front of a hyper religious customer, who for ten minutes blamed the incident of shifting weather patterns that signaled the return of Jesus, who was as she explained, upset about the abortion rates in America and President Obama. FML

I agree, your life sucks 73 838

You deserved it 5 267

By mwja - 26/02/2011 22:59 - France

Today, thanks to a particularly spicy bowl of noodles, my nose decided it would rather be a fountain. A fountain of blood. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 470

You deserved it 3 929

By Anonymous - 11/09/2015 17:25 - United States - Blairstown

Today, someone photoshopped my head onto some nude girl's body and spread it around at school. It was shockingly convincing. Now everyone's calling me a slut, and the worst part is I have no idea which photo the person used or where they got it from, so I can't prove it's a fake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 500

You deserved it 1 737

By thatisfuckedup - 13/06/2013 22:12 - United Kingdom

Today, I ordered some burgers at a fast food joint. When I said, "No lettuce," the cashier looked dumbfounded and asked, "What's that?" I literally had to say, "The green stuff" before she got it. I'm losing hope. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 357

You deserved it 3 865

By Melinda - 10/12/2009 05:14 - United States

Today, I was walking through the bar area of the restaurant I work at and fell on my ass. Customers complained to my manager that I shouldn't be drinking on the job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 616

You deserved it 2 884

So cute

By "lildale92" - 05/11/2019 02:00

Today, my youngest decided my phone needed a bath in the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 686

You deserved it 270

Deception

By Carlah - 17/03/2020 20:30

Today, I found out that the 19-year-old I've been seeing is really 26, with two kids and a pregnant fiancée. I'm only 17. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 012

You deserved it 412

By anon - 25/12/2014 20:20 - United States - Irwin

Today, a very drunk woman at the family Christmas party told me she felt terrible that I don't have a mother who cares about me. She is my mother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 153

You deserved it 2 492

By younggrammy - 20/08/2009 20:15 - United States

Today, my 14 year old daughter told me she's pregnant. I work as a public speaker for promoting celibacy and safe sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 095

You deserved it 45 196

Alternative medicine is bull

By Anonymous - 13/10/2020 23:01

Today, when my neighbor came over to ask about a serious rash her child had, she totally passed by me, the EMT/firefighter, to ask the hippy pastry chef what she thought of it, and if she had oils to "cure" it. So much for my job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 046

You deserved it 189

By Anonymous - 03/11/2012 18:02 - Australia - Wembley

Today, my boyfriend and I got intimate with each other for the first time. He shoved his hand down my pants, touched about an inch away from my clitoris, and whispered "cummm" in my ear. I doubt I'll have an orgasm ever again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 791

You deserved it 4 115

By Anonymous - 01/11/2011 09:03 - United States

Today, my best friend threw my football over a wall, so we hopped over to go and get it. Next thing we know, we're both surrounded by men pointing guns in our faces. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 324

You deserved it 7 505

By Anonymous - 12/01/2010 02:25 - Canada

Today, I walked in on my parents necking in the living room. I promptly covered my eyes and muttered something about my innocence being stolen from me. My dad looked up from the couch, and mentioned that he had heard my innocence being stolen by Jake, my boyfriend from 2 years ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 283

You deserved it 40 692

Prank culture has gone too far

By qhorin halflung - 22/07/2015 17:35

Today, on the bus, my blood sugar level got too low and I passed out. When I came to, the woman next to me was hitting me, saying she needed to get off and that she didn't have time for my, "stupid fucking prank." FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 400

You deserved it 2 161

Sticking together

By Anonymous - 14/05/2021 02:01

Today, I was disowned in my family because of the pandemic, after I refused to quit my job and live at my parents house, with them supporting my family, so now no one in my family has acknowledged my existence since August 2020. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 094

You deserved it 59

Don't feed the trolls

By pathetic - 23/04/2012 22:06 - Poland - Warsaw

Today, I was trolling in a chat room when someone said, quote, "He's just a no-life, unemployed loser still living in his mom's basement. Probably spends all day stroking his tiny dong and fantasizing about having a real girlfriend." I actually started crying because it was so accurate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 152

You deserved it 56 301

By singlemam - 15/03/2016 01:51 - United States - Akron

Today, while at the park, my 3 year-old ran up to a lady, grabbed her chest and loudly asked, "Are these your breasts? Are they private on you too?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 098

You deserved it 2 057

By Dan1021 - 04/02/2012 19:31 - France

Today, after telling my girlfriend that I loved her, she dumped me claiming I was getting "too attached". I've already spent almost $400 on her Valentine's Day present. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 953

You deserved it 23 197

By Anonymous - 09/08/2016 15:43 - United States - Pembroke

Today, my grandfather gave me a whole box of records to go with my new record player. When I thanked him, he said he'd been needing to get rid of them anyway because classical music makes him horny. I definitely didn't need to know that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 860

You deserved it 1 115

By Can't Unsee - 25/08/2018 22:00

Today, my mother found my sex toys. To make me "feel better" she showed me hers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 050

You deserved it 526

By stink - 04/09/2010 00:11

Today, my roommate informed me that he took a bet to not shower or bathe until Christmas. The bet is for five bucks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 343

You deserved it 2 743

By Liz0352 - 08/11/2018 04:30 - United States - Bainbridge Island

Today, my youngest son's teacher surprised me with a box of diapers. Apparently my son told her I was pregnant, but I'm not. I had to explain to her I'm just fat. She apologized and felt awful, and told me to keep the diapers. My children are 5 and 7. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 885

You deserved it 265

By cchandler - 23/09/2009 01:10 - United States

Today, I received a phone call from the number of a "single" guy I met online. It was his wife, who is three months pregnant. She threatened to kick my ass. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 261

You deserved it 8 019

By Scat - 15/12/2009 07:10 - United States

Today, my boyfriend asked me why I looked sad. I told him that I found out a co-worker died over the weekend and I failed my final exam. He then informed me that my toilet was clogged again, that he had a lot of work to do, and left. I have to find a plunger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 524

You deserved it 3 100

By sleeper - 02/03/2010 05:05 - France

Today, I was on the train when I fell asleep. Everything would have been fine but I was suddenly jerked awake by the very loud sound of my own fart, followed by the stares of many strangers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 235

You deserved it 6 051

By goingtothegym - 09/12/2013 01:16 - United States - Canyon Country

Today, I was accused of shoplifting because my jacket looked "too chunky". I wasn't stealing, I'm just fat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 663

You deserved it 6 536

Fast food dinner

By anonymous - 18/12/2019 20:00 - United States - San Angelo

Today, I called my husband and asked him what he wanted from our favorite fast food place. A divorce. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 129

You deserved it 171

By Anonymous - 04/12/2010 07:32 - United States

Today, my brother changed the password on my laptop so that I can't log into my profile. All my notes for school are on it and finals start on Monday. Guess who can't remember the new password. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 522

You deserved it 3 852

By fuglymug - 08/01/2016 21:48 - United States - Appleton

Today, I played charades with my girlfriend and her family. When it was her turn to act out a phrase, she simply walked to the center of the room and pointed to herself and then at me. It took less than 5 seconds for someone to correctly guess "Beauty and the Beast". FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 384

You deserved it 2 336

By byegeorge - 17/08/2012 11:26 - United Kingdom - Hounslow

Today, my dog was run over. The man who ran over my dog was taking his own dog to the emergency vet. As the man awkwardly tried to apologise to me, he said, "Think of the irony". FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 805

You deserved it 1 975

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Top comments

mykbibby 0

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Friday 24 April 2009 20:20

Hey, at least the income will still be coming in to one of you, instead of to a complete stranger. You would've been fired no matter what, better it be your boyfriend replacing you.

rukusrazor 0

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Friday 24 April 2009 20:26

Well now it's your turn to just sit on the couch all day and play xbox, while HE is paying rent and working.

charlottex33 0

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Friday 24 April 2009 20:07

hahaha that sucks FYL

nahgemoohc 17

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Thursday 31 May 2012 16:28

And looks like she'll be replacing you in the relationship.

MukyDaCookie 0

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Friday 24 April 2009 20:07

Wow! That really sucks Guess you weren't doing such a good job huh?

padlarf 14

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Friday 24 April 2009 20:11

What? A real FML? :O

quantumoftruth 0

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Friday 24 April 2009 20:15

Think of it as a new beginning. Use your new found free time to kill that motherfucker's entire family

Jiplo 18

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Thursday 15 May 2014 3:35

A bit harsh there, are we?

OrdinaryMan_fml 0

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Friday 24 April 2009 20:15

You shoulda just let your bf to find his own job, YDI :)

toolman 0

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Friday 24 April 2009 20:20

if he knew it you should dump him. now.

celtics18 0

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Sunday 19 August 2012 0:23

Holy shit you're retarded

mykbibby 0

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Friday 24 April 2009 20:20

Hey, at least the income will still be coming in to one of you, instead of to a complete stranger. You would've been fired no matter what, better it be your boyfriend replacing you.

kwbuzz23wk 0

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Friday 24 April 2009 20:21

#4 FTW!!!!

rannerbananer 8

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Monday 18 August 2014 6:21

Yeah I'm a little confused by #4's comment as well...? Lol what the heck???

blue8795 0

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Friday 24 April 2009 20:22

Agreeing with #7. They would've fired you either way, since they were obviously looking. If you're living with him, no net loss of money. Still, that sucks. A real FML.