Today, I noticed that my facial hair had grown by an acceptable amount. I spoke to my Dad and decided to show him, thinking he would approve of my manliness. His exact words when I showed him were, "Nah, son. You just look like a lesbian." FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I had to come to terms with having more facial hair than my boyfriend, despite being female since birth. FML
Today, one of my dad's work friends came over. As he was leaving, he complimented my dad on having three "strapping young boys." I informed him that I'm a girl, and I have a hormone imbalance that causes me to have a lot of hair and a deep voice. I guess my dress didn't give him a clue. FML
Today, I video-chatted with my mom and showed her my new, very short haircut. My dad walked in, took one look at me and said, "I can only attribute this to penis envy," and walked out again. FML
Today, after growing my hair out for over a year and constantly being told that it makes me look like a girl, I finally cut it. The first thing my friends said when they saw me was that I now look like a "lesbian." FML
Today, I had to meet my mother. Being a college student, I decided I was too lazy to shave this morning. She noticed the stubble on my face, and started crying because I'm growing up. I'm 23 years-old. My dad yelled at me for making my mom cry. FML
Today, I asked my boyfriend if he was growing a mustache, as he had whiskers. He looked at me and said "No, but apparently you are." FML
Today, I asked my dad to please shave his awful beard, because I'm a laughing-stock at school for being picked up each day by a guy whose face looks like Bigfoot's ass. He agreed, and 10 minutes later was sporting a pedo-stache. It's going to be a long year. FML
Today, one of my friends pointed out I'm starting to get a mustache! - "You're finally a man!" To bad it's my 15th birthday, and I'm a girl. FML
Today, my mom told me that I need to shave my beard because it's getting too long. This wouldn't be so bad if it weren't for the fact that I'm a woman. FML
Today, I was looking down at my chest and noticed the hairs growing upon it. For a 16 year old, it's pretty impressive. It's a shame that I'm a girl though. FML
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Top comments
ole_sidai 4
I wasn't aware lesbians had facial hair.
flockz 20
hey at least your facial hair was longer than kim kardashian's marriage.
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Comments (124)
leadman1989 16
Steven the lesbian *You watch it - what... the... ****? Me - yeah I guess I should have warned you.
perdix 31
Lesbians look more manly than prepubescent boys, so you are making progress. You may want to raise the bar on what an "acceptable" amount of facial hair is.
Metteris 0
What? Lesbians like other women, so why would they wanna look like boys? Apparently you have no clue about such things.
perdix 31
Some of them are butch and look more manly than a boy. Also, some women have noticeable amounts of facial hair and some of those could be said butch lesbians.
jaredofmo 22
52 — My managers were talking about this at work once. "Why be a lesbian if you go after girls who look like guys? Just go for guys then!"
perdix 31
#69, your managers need to look at some girl-on-girl ****, (for educational purposes, of course!) Some lesbians are beautiful, feminine women and others are the ugly, butchy type. I'm sure that others are ordinary-looking women. It's not right for your managers or Metteris to generalize that all lesbians look one way or another.
Metteris 0
Perdix - well you were the one who said lesbians look more manly than prepubescent boys - so my point was that far from all lesbians look like that. Maybe a very few! - besides, lesbian **** isn't very close to real life, so stop stereotyping all lesbians. 69 - your managers are smarter than some. So tired of people thinking that lesbians look or dress like men. I know plenty lesbians and not one of them is very manly. Most of them are long haired, and most of them prefer feminine women too. I'm in a lesbian relationship also, and I'm not masculine or even androgynous in any way. :)
dmadsen33 9
I don't know if you've noticed the slight difference between the male and female genitals..? Lesbians don't like d!ck. It's really not that complicated, you see.
Metteris 0
That's lame. Lesbians don't have facial hair. They are woman who are attracted to other women, so they don't necessarily want to look like men! It's quite stereotypical to say all lesbians have facial hair - they're woman, how would they even grow facial hair. Seriously.
elementalz 2
U sir are an idiot they don't grow facial hair as fast as men but they defintly have it it's called bleaching ur lip lol
Metteris 0
Well, you, sir, must be an idiot. I'm female, and a lesbian. Neither me or my girlfriend grow facial hair. I know a few woman has some fuzz on the upper lip, but they often wax, and it's nothing like a man's beard! No women want a beard, whether they are straight or lesbians. And having facial hair has nothing to do with ones sexuality. If a woman want to grow a beard, maybe she is transsexual. In that case, she's not a lesbian. She is.. A transsexual. There's a big difference.
maine8524 2
Best response: "but dad i am one"
PYLrulz 17
That's why it's usually best just to keep shaving in your school years. Facial hair usually looks pathetic. Out of all my friends that I knew in high school, there was only one that could pull off having reasonable facial hair without looking pathetic.
TheWhiteBunny 3
Justin Bieber should stop posting to FML.
Irknoc_fml 1
Since when lesbians have hair on their face? I mean, more than other girls..?
murdersquirrel 15
I think he's thinking of transgender male-to-females that undergo hormone therapy in anticipation of gender reassignment surgery. But if they identify as male and like women, they're not really lesbians.
murdersquirrel 15
Other way. Female-to-male. Oops.
Metteris 0
Exactly. Facial hair really has nothing to do with being a lesbian. But yeah, if you're transgender - but then you're not a lesbian. You're becoming a (straight) man. :) OP's father must be pretty clueless about today's world.
gurlucrazy 0
omg Justin Bieber uses FML!!
luminex 0
Lol
hateevryone 15
your dad sucks