Today, I'm studying abroad in Russia, and I lost my keys to my dorm room. In the office I asked for a spare and she spoke really fast so I couldn't hear her. Assuming I don't speak Russian, she gets on the phone and calls maintenance saying, "There is this ugly girl about to cry... come fix it." FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Same thing different taste
On the hook
Today, I lost my keys. My roommate locked me out, then yelled at me when I made her come home to let me in. I tore my room apart searching for them, and even went out to search my locker room. When I got home, I glanced at my wall only to find my keys hanging on the hook I set up specifically for them. FML
Inappropriate
Today, I went to take a shower, but forgot my towel and dorm key in my room. After my shower, I had to run down to the front desk butt-naked, using only a shampoo bottle as cover, and ask for a temporary key. The person running the front desk was my ex-girlfriend’s current boyfriend. FML
Today, my roommate who stays out til 4 or 5 in the morning each night got her key to the dorm fixed. I've been having to stay up nightly to let her in (my normal bedtime being 12:00) How'd they fix it? Turns out it was never broken she was just putting the key in the slot wrong. FML
Today, I locked myself out of my dorm room. I walked across campus, shoe-less and in nothing but my bathrobe, to find someone who could let me back in. Turns out I hadn't even shut the door properly and so it never actually locked. I can still hear the guy laughing at me. FML
Make it make sense
Today, my boss is on the phone with a Russian customer, who keeps saying, "Speak Russian please!" My boss asks me to translate, as he hired me for my knowledge of Russian. He says something, I translate in Russian, then the customer says, "Speak English please!" FML
Today, my roommate has gone home for the weekend. She forgot to turn her alarm clock off. Her door is locked. FML
Today, my roommate asked me to lock the door as we left our place. I told her to use my keys, because my hands were full. Afterwards, she and her boyfriend set off out of town for the next couple of days. She forgot to give me back my keys. FML
Today, while taking a shower in the dorm bathroom, my roommate thought it would be funny to steal my towel, robe, and key. I spent over an hour waiting for someone to come into the bathroom so I could ask them to bring me something to cover up. FML
Today, my long-distance boyfriend came to visit. We went to a cafe where I managed to lock myself in the toilet, breaking the key. I then had to wait for them to break down the door. I came out to applause from everyone, who had been laughing at me for 25 minutes. FML
Today, I heard a knock on my door and, thinking it was my student adviser, opened it. I was greeted by a drunk girl, who pushed her way into my dorm room, informed me that she lived here last year, and then told me that she lost her virginity in my bed. FML
Top comments
SilverXeno 0
In Soviet Russia, you don't lose keys. KEYS LOSE YOU!
WFMS 0
you should of said " the ugly girl can hear you" in Russian to her
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Comments (170)
gotdapowa 0
124: if you hate Russians, try germany dumköpf arschloch!
Chocolate_Chunk 2
Spelling "Dummkopf" isn't that hard. Mach dich nicht zum Hans.
lampbandit 0
Well that sucks..
Arseniy 0
Russkie est vezde
valdigrad 0
ne, lutche idioti' kotoriye prikidoyutsa ruskime haha
bamam 0
I sure hope you had a good response for her
garner20 0
in soviet Russia the keys loose you.
leah0500 0
Too bad so sad I speak Russian too
sgtcxelite 11
My question is, how did you ask for a spare key..? If it was in Russian, she'd know you can speak the language. If it was in English, she wouldn't have answered in Russian and would have probably called maintenance before trying. I know there's a possibility of an English-to-Russian book, but I based on what OP said, she could speak and understand it fine. And why wouldn't OP just say in Russian "Excuse me?" or "Could you repeat that?". There must have been a long pause to make her think you didn't understand..
Jamesy52 1
I know this is several years old but seriously, who goes to study in Russia?
Arzu29 2
u guys need to stop insulting russians. im from russia and its just annoying how some ppl think they no shit but they're just ****** up
cryssycakesx3 23
no need to prove their point...