FML : Today, my roommate asked me to lock the door as we left our place. I told her to use my keys, because my hands were full. Afterwards, she and her boyfriend...

Today, my roommate asked me to lock the door as we left our place. I told her to use my keys, because my hands were full. Afterwards, she and her boyfriend set off out of town for the next couple of days. She forgot to give me back my keys. FML

I agree, your life sucks

You deserved it

By me - / Monday 20 December 2010 02:26 / Bulgaria

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Top comments

By perdix | 29

#1868842 - Monday 20 December 2010 9:36

Go hunt them down to retrieve your keys. They might reward your tenacity with a threesome.

By grandpaearthling | 2

#1868815 - Monday 20 December 2010 9:31

bet now you are wishing you'd put down the sex doll and helped your roommate. now you and blow up barbie are stuck all alone for two days without keys. guess your plan worked out in the end. sweet deal

Comments

By Obliviousair | 0

#1868634 - Monday 20 December 2010 9:11

Get new friends D:

xGUMMYBEARSx | 0

#1869150 - Monday 20 December 2010 10:44

don't tell me what to do!!!! D:

gooBUZZ | 0

#1869645 - Monday 20 December 2010 13:14

Don't tell me what to do either! D:

DishHeads | 9

#1869965 - Monday 20 December 2010 14:39

don't tell them what to do !!!! though you can tell me

PuppiesFTW | 5

#1871522 - Monday 20 December 2010 22:44

Don't tell them what to do, except for DishHeads, and don't tell me what to do and what not to do.D:

ShadowSneaker360 | 16

#5829812 - Friday 17 January 2014 13:14

You get new friends!! xD

By hiddydiddy | 0

#1868639 - Monday 20 December 2010 9:11

Wellsleeeponthestreet

brennboo | 3

#1868675 - Monday 20 December 2010 9:14

whyarewetalkinglikethis?iguessthespacebarranaway:(

mathew17986g | 2

#1868764 - Monday 20 December 2010 9:25

ummm did your space bar break?

hiddydiddy | 0

#1868774 - Monday 20 December 2010 9:26

nah actually on my iphone the lowest line is broken, so signs and space take a lot of time
also its funniertotalklikethis:)

By paigeykkins | 0

#1868641 - Monday 20 December 2010 9:11

time to head back to your moms! :D

By alaaloo_fml_fml | 0

#1868651 - Monday 20 December 2010 9:12

Ummm call the landlord?

alaaloo_fml_fml | 0

#1869008 - Monday 20 December 2010 10:01

Ohmygosh, I know :D I am pretty sure OP hadn't thought of that!

DocBastard | 38

#1869756 - Monday 20 December 2010 13:43

Right. I'm pretty sure OP ran around flailing her arms and screaming like a banshee until she resorted to pounding on the door until her knuckles bled and her hands fell off, finally resigning to living out the rest of her days as a handless prostitute who could not even give a handjob.

Or, she probably did think of calling the landlord. Whatever.