Today, I learned that my apartment's walls are thin enough for my neighbors to hear my vibrator. I've lived in this apartment for three years. I've been single and horny for all of them. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I found out just how thin the walls at my new student flat are. They are so thin in fact, that I can hear the creepy guy next door say my full name over and over again very slowly whilst masturbating rigorously. FML
Today, I found out that the extremely attractive man that works in my building can hear everything I say about him through the paper-thin walls. FML
Today, I thought I was in a relatively soundproof room before I started up my vibrator. It would have been, if the door wasn't wide open behind the curtains. FML
Today, I acted like I always do when I'm alone in my seemingly sound-proof apartment. I sang loudly, talked back to the TV, used my vibrator. Later, in the silence of the night, I heard my neighbor next door YAWNING. FML
Today, I realized that my neighbors can not only hear me singing in the shower through my apartment's paper-thin walls, they also take great delight in recording it so that they can play it at high volume for their friends when they next throw a party. I want to disappear. FML
Today, at dinner, my downstairs neighbors described how they can hear most of my movements, including the buzz of my phone when I text late at night. I think all of us knew that it's not my phone that's vibrating at that time. FML
Today, my new neighbours moved in. I had always thought my bedroom wall was soundproof, because my old neighbours never complained about my loud night terrors. Turns out they were just stone deaf. The new ones can hear everything. FML
Today, the walls in my house are so thin that I heard my roommate yell from the bathroom upstairs, "Hear my butthole roar." Now I’m scared to use the bathroom after him. FML
Today, for the second day in a row, I got to hear both of my roommates having sex, through two closed doors and a hallway. This is as I hit my thirtieth month of involuntary celibacy. FML
Today, I heard some rhythmic moaning from the apartment next door. It took me 10 minutes to realize that my neighbor was not having it off, she was actually vacuuming her apartment. It's been so long since I've had sex that I can't even recognize the sound of other people having it. FML
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Top comments
RoccoRox 0
just say, I do have a boyfriend, he's just battery operated ;).
glorialaura21 8
well just say it's your electric toothbrush! ..and you were making noise bc you have sensitive teeth and it hurts when u brush? lol duhh
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Comments (257)
FFML_314 12
That's how we get down in Minnesota. :P
Fedor_is_KING 0
And they didn't offer you any assistance with your horniness? Not very neighborly of them.
Schizomaniac 24
Tell them it's a light saber.
FFML_314 12
Those don't vibrate. Vibrators don't glow. Come on Schitz!
Schizomaniac 24
They don't vibrate, but they make the "Wom, woooooooom" sound that sounds like a vibration! And there are no apartment walls thin enough to see through, so the glowing doesn't matter!Come on Aria/Anna, whichever one your name is!
FFML_314 12
laslfjaslkfdsldfjlasfj! Anna. I have XRay vision. I can see through walls.
Schizomaniac 24
Hahaha, sorry! Anna it is. Well I guess that changes things a bit -_-
rajput 17
I'm sure they make glow in the dark vibrators.
justmeagirl 0
It's hard if you don't think some desperate disease-infested a**hole is worth the risk or emotional drain. (smart, normal) women consider themselves human beings, not sex objects.
justmeagirl 0
Also, women don't consider sex the be all and end all- sex is part of their life, not the only objective of it. We're actually human beings, not animals.
Shaggy_92 5
-32 no man it's the vibrator where she needs a safety helmet in case she gets throwd off LMAO ROFL ! ydi just tell the dude with darkness comes beauty OP! rofl
emo_devon 11
hey, you can go onto sites, or adult stores and ask for a vibrator that has a very quiet motor, there ARE vibrators like that. really. a good site would be honeygifts.com
cathylee22 4
why does everyone assume the op is ugly just bc she has been single. what is with ppl on here geez. It's not a big deal that she is single. As for hearing the vibrator big deal it could work in your favor! Your neighbors could have a cute friend and mention the horny girl next door an all your problems will be solved :)
Unnamedsoul 0
that is very true
mmmonique 6
I agree with you cathylee, maybe OP is single by choice but still wants to fulfil her sexual needs. I have a very active sex life with my bf but still use my vibe quite often...
Shaggy_92 5
the reason we do is cus I mean seriously. girls that are horny get snached up quicker than anything. no offence to the op I was just sayin like if she ain't attractive just turn off the lights then you're good to go. now if she is fat and ugly not assuming she is, now that's a tough one. lol :)
cathylee22 4
it's not true that horny cute girls get snatched up quicker then anything. I'm single and I'm niether fat or ugly an can have my sexy moments like any girl. Some guys just can't approach girls.
1frostedcupcake 0
haha, "There goes Buzzie again, we need to find her a date for the sake of her vibrator..." LMFAO