Intimacy: Today, I just realized the harder my girlfriend comes during...

By SkiMaskFukd - 07/05/2010 13:25 - United States

Today, I just realized the harder my girlfriend comes during sex, the louder she snores after. I've tried earplugs but sometimes, like tonight, once I am up, I can't fall back to sleep. My choices are thus great sex and no sleep, or great sleep but no sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 293

You deserved it 5 827

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 07/11/2009 16:24 - United States

Today, I wanted to sleep in after a rough week, only to be woken up by my roommate's sex screams and the pounding of her bed against the wall. Earplugs did not help. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 867

You deserved it 2 438

Earthquake

By Bolin - 17/05/2021 08:08

Today, I have to sleep in another room, with the door closed, because if I don't, my girlfriend's snoring will keep me awake. I was diagnosed with chronic insomnia because of this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 947

You deserved it 134

Chainsaw massacre

By sleepless in sleeplessness - 18/06/2021 11:01 - United States

Today, my girlfriend snores like a lumberjack. Even when I leave to sleep on the couch, I can still hear her through the door. She won’t go to the doctor because, "snoring runs in her family and they’re all just fine." Yeah, uh huh. FML

I agree, your life sucks 943

You deserved it 148

By Tired Girlfriend - 14/06/2017 22:00

Today, it's 2am. I've been trying to get to sleep for the past two hours next to my snoring boyfriend. Every time I nudge him to shut him up, his body tenses, he farts, then goes straight back to snoring. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 907

You deserved it 508

Confinement is rough

By daisythebunny1988 - 25/03/2020 05:15

Today, my mother is snoring so loud that I can still hear her with the door shut and with earplugs in. So much for sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 469

You deserved it 150

Someone needs a good talking to

By Anonymous - 02/07/2025 11:00 - United States - Riverside

Today, my husband once again woke me up in the wee hours to have sex. Don’t get me wrong, the sex is great but as soon as he nuts he rolls over and goes right back to sleep. I however am stuck awake and can’t get back to sleep no matter how hard I try. FML

I agree, your life sucks 424

You deserved it 136

Narcolepsy

By Isuckreallybad - 06/02/2021 21:30 - United States

Today, my girlfriend fell asleep during sex. This isn't the first time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 931

You deserved it 442

By ryan - 10/02/2010 15:08 - United States

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. Its was pretty good and heavy and she was moaning nicely. Then her moans got softer and softer and then nothing. She fell asleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 510

You deserved it 6 839

By pornhastaughtmenothing - 21/02/2013 08:46 - United States - Tacoma

Today, I realized just how bad I am in bed when my girlfriend literally yawned the words, "Oh God" while attempting to fake an orgasm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 433

You deserved it 11 665

By quietsleeper - 13/10/2009 11:07 - United States

Today, my new girlfriend told me I don't snore when I sleep. Which is funny, since during the last year of my marriage, my ex-wife would make me sleep on the couch because my loud snoring kept her up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 527

You deserved it 2 977

blobzorz 0

Friday 7 May 2010 19:08

sleep is better

tysta 0

Friday 7 May 2010 19:10

Just Jack off and sleep good.... Problem solved.

Comments

jennayyydoll 0

Thursday 2 September 2010 2:10

Great sex. Duh. :)

FailTiger 0

Friday 3 September 2010 9:37

I don't snore. ;)

cdebrunn 0

Wednesday 8 September 2010 19:37

earplugs.

emmyers 0

Sunday 17 October 2010 7:46

sleeping pills. they were made for a reason

Lord_of_0 4

Monday 18 October 2010 4:22

What's that phrase? The harder they come, the louder they snore...or something like that.

kainwolf 0

Monday 21 February 2011 11:37

You can't sleep after great sex? Ok. Ear plugs and sleeping pills. Or just ********** till you fall asleep.

HustnWeHavAProbl 0

Monday 18 April 2011 3:22

the former

Tubbz 0

Wednesday 22 June 2011 17:52

this should even be a question

Kayokku 1

Wednesday 6 July 2011 8:59

Maybe you should find a happy medium.

KaintukeeBob 13

Friday 15 July 2011 21:13

What's a psychic have to do with this?

funeralgal 4

Friday 18 November 2011 22:02

#151: Like what? Mediocre sex and an average nights sleep? Nooooooo thanks.

funeralgal 4

Friday 18 November 2011 22:10

Sorry, I meant #150.....

ThisRandomChild 0

Wednesday 10 August 2011 11:08

Hm, tough call

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Today, my boss told me I ask too many questions and that's why they cut my hours in half. Officially, I'm a "Pharmacy Technician in Training", which means I'm trying to teach myself how to do the job without killing someone. All from on the job experience and an outdated textbook. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 060

You deserved it 2 599

Today, I was hanging with my friends when out of the blue, I got thirsty. Friends said there was Gatorade in the fridge. Being the trusting person I am, I took a drink, only to discover it was piss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 526

You deserved it 310

Today, a lady who works for my husband confided in me that they've been sleeping with each other and now she's pregnant. She didn't know I was his wife. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 737

You deserved it 3 934

Today, I visited my dad's grave to give it a clean, since moss and shit were starting to grow on the gravestone. Apparently this counts as vandalism, according to the groundskeeper, because soap and water can damage the stone and make it crumble faster. Yes, the city cops sent me a fine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 279

You deserved it 138

Today, after a small fight with my girlfriend, I started to miss her, so I typed her name into Google on a whim. Surprisingly, I find a link to a blog in which the owner describes his ongoing effort to seduce my girl. During times she told me she was alone. Thanks babe. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 848

You deserved it 3 513

Today, I made a bowl of spaghetti for my girlfriend and me. I tried the move from Lady and the Tramp where the boy and girl both slurp the same piece of spagetti and end up kissing. When I tried it, the spagetti went too down far my throat, and I ended up throwing it up on her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 408

You deserved it 155