Today, I heard my daughter scream at my son through the bathroom door, "Are you jacking off in there or something?" and him scream back at her "Shut up you fucking cunt!" My daughter is 7 and my son is 8. FML
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College Life
Packed lecture halls, a sketchy roommate and frat parties: welcome to college, the real thing.
Today, I overheard my 11-year-old son giving my 8-year-old daughter the sex talk. FML
Today, a 7-year-old girl came up to me and told me to go fuck myself. I told her to watch her language or else I'd tell her parents. Her mom happened to be nearby and actually heard the conversation; she came up to me and told me to go fuck myself as well. FML
Today, my 7 year-old daughter loudly asked in the middle of a supermarket, "Mummy, what's a cunt?" FML
Today, I woke up to my daughter crying, and my son running through the living room completely naked with her bottle, laughing his head off. FML
Today, my daughter walked in on me taking a shower. She said, "Hey, yours is the same size as Dylan's!" My daughter has seen Dylan's penis, which apparently is the same size as mine. My daughter and Dylan are 7. FML
Today, I overheard my mom giving my 6-year-old daughter the sex talk. FML
Today, I was having sex with my wife when my 14 year-old daughter texted me from her room, "Stop." FML
Today, my boyfriend and I heard my parents going at it upstairs. He said, "sounds like they're having more fun than we did." To make it worse, he crept to their door and put his ear to it, telling me what he heard. FML
Today, I overheard my 5 year old daughter call a girl in her dance class a slut. Shocked, I asked her where she heard that word. Her response: "I heard you and Daddy say it about her Mommy." FML
Today, I was rushing around like a lunatic trying to get my shit together and knocked on my son's door a few times. The fourth time I did it, he shouted at me to just fuck off already because he’s trying to have a wank. Oops, and TMI son, TMI. FML
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Top comments
GIRAFFES 0
Wow. I blame public schools? Harrr. :B
amyzerz 0
What sort of vulgar environment are you raising your kids in? Or is it simply the way our schooling system has come to nowadays... FYL & YDI.
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Comments (880)
An0nymous_ 0
are you married to Ike Turner?
Dopehead666 21
That's hilarious and pathetic at the same time. I think you should be more worried about how they learned to behave that way and how to fix it instead of posting on FML!
dan81892 2
AHAHAHAHAHAHA
horribleville 0
Not the schools fault, hate it when people say that.
Newtons_Cradle 0
am I the only one who thought this wasn't a shock due to the parents teaching their kids, but more a shock because they assumed they protected their kids? seriously, parents these days are kinda naive. sorry about that OP, that kinda tricky. They're just words though. once they find out that they don't make anyone view them as grown ups, they'll stop. it worked for me. (until i got to high school and discovered the joys of calculus tests)
candii_fml 0
the younger they are he more they sweearr, :) ur kidss are pretty cooll, BUT..... its not like its ur fault unless they hear you say thesee thinggss or you let them watch shows and movies with this kinda stuff they grab these things frrom skool everykid duzz i had an eight year old curse at me 4 two minutes straight :/ (ahnd they didnt repeat any words)
ander3w 0
ur a terrible parent
rebeccaanne 0
well you must of let them watched the movie thirteen . just happens to be one of my favorites , and that happens to be an exact line from the movie . maybe your just a fan and made up hoping no one would realize, or maybe its just a coincidence , or maybe they did watch the movie .
MissBunnyfufu 0
well now your eyes are open. hope you do something about it!
taylorptato55 0
wow really? i would blame the school but i didnt learn what any of those things meant until like 6th grade lol, still pretty young but damn! wow ok no offense but you should really watch your language around your kids or shes gonna grow up to be a hooker and hes gonna grow up to be a pimp...again no offense lol