Today, I had to make a deal with my 22 year old fiancé. What was the deal? If he put deodorant on, he could squeeze my boob for as long as he liked. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I was fooling around with my husband on the bed. I was excited as he lifted my arms up in a seductive way, only to roll deodorant under my armpits. FML
Today, I had to stop my 26 year old fiancé from picking his nose and eating it like a little boy. Three times. FML
Today, I had to tell my 30 year-old boyfriend to take a shower, or else he won't for a week. FML
Today, my boyfriend's farts got so bad that we made a deal: every day that he doesn't fart, he gets a blowjob. Suddenly, he's not letting gas out anymore. FML
Today, I was making out with my boyfriend whilst straddled on top of him. He started to undo my bra. I was fine with this but he stopped kissing me and looked at me with a slight smile. He then said, "I know this is going to kill the mood... but I feel like I could milk your boobs right now" FML
Today, I had to use anti-perspirant deodorant under my breasts. FML
Today, I had to use antiperspirant deodorant under my breasts. FML
Today, it was my birthday. My boyfriend was kind enough to give me prescription strength deodorant. FML
Today, my fiancé hugged me so tight that I couldn't move, said he loved me, let out a loud, obnoxious and smelly fart cloud and made me breathe it in. FML
Today, I found out my boyfriend had bought me sexy lingerie for our anniversary. However, they're for for a bigger bust. When I asked if I could return it for the right size, he asked me to get a boob job to fit the bra instead. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thank you, your FML was submitted, and will appear the moderation soon!
Top comments
PFiddy 0
all the inspiration a guy needs
srhshl 9
1 percent inspiration, 99 percent perspiration.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (189)
melkor_the_fox 0
if you are mad about it then you don't respect his laziness being a part of who he is and it's time to make him change or leave him
pinkredneck30 2
omg!
roxas355 0
how long did he squeez it for? lol
NYMTS 4
a long ass time !! Lol
hottottie 0
don't you know guys never change.. so don't expect him to when your married.
epicfmylife123 0
a guy wants you to put on deodorant and then he wants to squeeze your boobs if that was me I would say 1$ for expired milk :p
DawnMarie11 0
wow there really isn't anything to say besides cleanliness is next to Godliness
fml98kevin 4
immediate boner... but he would have put it on anyway.
totalldave 0
Gross. You should try dating guys that use deodorant.
iyazwoodfle 4
'boob'? where's the other one?
Sjeesen 4
Sounds like a good deal to me.