Today, I had to explain to my husband that it's biologically impossible for cats and dogs to cross-breed, and that his "brilliant idea" of getting ours to mate is just plain disturbing. He still doesn't believe me. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Same thing different taste
Today, my husband and I found out that our dog was pregnant. He now refuses to have kids with me for at least two years, because he wants to raise the puppies without any "distractions". FML
Today, I had to explain to my 22-year-old boyfriend that mice do not grow up to be rats. FML
Today, I spent an hour explaining to a college student how you could have a baby and not be married. He still doesn't get it. FML
Summer lovin'
Today, I found out my cat and my roommate's dog are apparently lesbians who are into what is basically bestiality to us humans. Despite both being female (and fixed), his dog tried to hump my cat, and my cat didn't resist at all. Trying to get his dog off my cat took way more effort than it should have. FML
Today, after a long discussion, my dad still doesn't understand how evolution works, and thinks it's a myth that was debunked a long time ago. FML
Birds aren't real
Today, my boyfriend and I were watching TV and there were penguins laying eggs. He said, "Penguins are mammals, they don't lay eggs." I replied, "Penguins are birds." We fought about it for ages until he realised that I was right, and has since stopped talking to me. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I spent 30 minutes listening to my grandmother telling us that my cat is a medium. My boyfriend is totally convinced. FML
Today, my cat was diagnosed with FIV, to which my in-laws said, "That's impossible!" Apparently, what is possible though is that aliens are stealing their pool water. FML
Follow the lifescript or else
Today, I once again had to explain that my husband's vasectomy was because we really don't want children, and that, "but you can always adopt or try to undo the vasectomy" isn't an appropriate answer. FML
Today, I learned that while anybody can call me a bitch, my husband got mad at his aunt for calling our dog a mutt. FML
Top comments
Brightbulb 40
It's cat-dog in real life! Maybe you should show him the cartoon, then he will understand it's a dead and impossible concept.
nancy_rm 10
I fear for your cat and dog. Good luck with him OP.
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Comments (60)
Witchylady 18
Your husband is pretty dumb. That's like saying it is possible for humans and fish to cross breed. I think he needs to start reading more.
NiceGuysDoWin 21
Then how do we get mermaids?
protoskore 27
probably went to one of those schools that say evolution is "just a theory" ? (if they mention it at all)
DeathBunny218 37
"Soon I will have the perfect hybrid of a pet - the loyalty of a cat with the cleanliness of a dog" - Homer Simpson
simsgirlgem 25
sounds like he watched catdog one too many times
melkymac101 17
Hold up! I don't believe you
Crazynocatlady 22
He's barking mad!
AshleighD3070 3
In fairness, I didn't do science in school and I only learned that recently. However I did learn that it's theoretically possible for humans and apes to mate. Please don't tell your husband. x x x
Cas547 8
According to evolution, anything is possible. Go for it!
valentinov 15
#69 Just like #18, your comments are "educated" and "good". It's amazing how many people don't know this basic stuff: cross-breeding is impossible in nature. The FML app should be used to collect data about people's stupidity and ignorance. The results should be published and used to make a wake-up call: it doesn't matter if you have a school near you, and you have financial means to get educated, even if you don't have it, is just as likely to be ignorant and stupid. I'm sorry... I really do. This is so sad that it's not even funny anymore.
tracyswingkid 8
Um, no, and get your pets spayed or neutered. Now.
HellboundAlleee 4
"According to evolution, anything is possible. Go for it!" No, no, evolution does not tell us that two different species can breed. You're thinking about *miracles.* *Miracles.* Not science. And I second the spaying and neutering thing. Tell your husband that the sperm of the cat and the egg of a dog, or vice-versa have only one half of the dna information, and they seek a similar dna half: a zipper, if you will. The zippers just don't fit between these species.