Today, I had three things converge that should never be together: my period, hot doctor, and a colonoscopy. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, at the age of 25, for the first time in my life, I was lying mostly naked in front of a man while he was inserting something in my body. Too bad that man was a doctor and that thing was a colonoscopy. FML
Today, I had my anus probed twice by two different doctors. I was diagnosed with hemorrhoids. I'm a 22 year old guy and have to schedule a colonoscopy for next week. I guess there's a first time for everything. FML
Today, I got my period. I was going to have my first threesome tomorrow. FML
Today, I have a UTI that spread to my kidneys, a yeast infection, and a herpes outbreak. Oh, and my period came this morning. FML
Today, I was lucky to have an extremely attractive doctor operating on me. This would have been great had he not been removing a foreign object from my vagina after an ill-fated masturbation session. FML
Today, I got my period. 10 minutes into a 3 hour exam. Apparently they are serious when they say you may not leave the room under any circumstances. FML
Today, I'm in the hospital getting prepped for a colonoscopy. Accidents happen, but the worst was right after the janitor finished cleaning the aftermath of the LAST accident. FML
Today, I realised that the last three people to see my intimate parts these last weeks were my beautician, my doctor and the lady who did my check up ultra sound. Oh, and I'm married. FML
Today, I have both a cold and a period. Tomorrow, I will have a cold, my period and my wisdom teeth taken out. FML
Today, I went to see a doctor because of some blood in my stool. Not only is the matter embarrassing enough as is, it turned out the doctor was a young, crisply dressed, extremely handsome man. I then had his finger in my ass for a check-up, all the while him being very nice about it. I'm still mortified. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
perdix 31
Don't think you really had a chance with the hot doctor -- to him, you're just another asshole.
speshlk37 13
It's the perfect storm...
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (149)
StreetReaper 9
Look on the bright side. You don't have to worry about having a bruised prostate from the 17 foot hose being shoved up your ass.
abceasyas123abc 12
Why on Earth would you have a bruised prostate? The prostate sits at the base of the bladder. The scope is entering the rectum and colon. You'd have a perforated colon before you got a "bruised" prostate and that's way more of a concern.
StreetReaper 9
I know where the prostate resides. It's not that difficult to bruise one by colonoscopy. Do you think digital prostate exams reach your bladder? Sometimes one would think so by the tenacity of some docs, but to close your argument; I have had my prostate bruised by a colonoscopy without the dreaded complications of a perforated bowel that you stated.
XRaYKaT 3
That's hot.
mvems 13
^hahahaha
ICastillo 25
*In British Accent* Bloody Hell!!!
SliceOfCake 9
Why thank you, Ron Weasley.
ICastillo 25
You call me Ron Weasley again you slice of cake I'm going to eat you!!!!
charvisioku 22
"British accent"? That's not very specific, so I'm going to assume you mean Brummy. That makes your comment funny. If you mean London, that's over-used. And we don't all talk like that, mate.
ICastillo 25
53 lets just go with the funny one ok.
charvisioku 22
Might as well.
AzzieC 12
That's horrible :p
ElricMustang 23
Lol anyone thinking about the doctor? F both your lives
charvisioku 22
I dunno why it matters that the doctor was 'hot'. It's not like he's gonna look at you any differently from other patients. Apart from possibly finding you a bit weird if you're acting all coy and fluttering your eyelashes. Geez.
calivianya 29
It's less about how the doctor feels or acts, and more about how she feels about a hot guy seeing her tampon string hanging out while performing the colonoscopy, I'd wager.
Timmeeh 17
Let's be honest here, his first meeting with you revolved around shoving a few feet of hose into your pooper to take a look at your insides. And without a single euphemism. Even disregarding oaths pertaining to dating patients and unfortunately timed periods, it was probably never going to go much beyond the hospital.
charvisioku 22
It still doesn't remotely matter whether the doctor is 'hot'. Like the guy below me said, it's not like it's gonna go beyond the hospital any way, so it's just needless added stress over something really, really petty. That's all I was saying *shrug* (meant as a reply to the reply to mine.. bah exam stress has exploded my sense of direction, **** it)
inkyloveblot 2
You mean the guy above you
alycion 39
Nothing worse then a period during a procedure. Hope you get good news from the test.
caplox 6
You should've asked to go to the bathroom an never came back. That really must've been embarrassing Op. FYL.