Maternity leave

By Anonymous - 24/03/2022 04:00

Today, we were so desperate to be parents, we've had IVF twice until our son was born. I was not ready for just how much I would hate him. I physically detest my son. I didn’t want to hold him when he was born, he makes my skin crawl when I breastfeed and I barely look at him. Messed up, right? FML
I agree, your life sucks 1 019
You deserved it 501

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Sounds like postnatal depression - please speak to your Dr, as they can put things into place to help you xx

Yeah you don’t have to keep living like this, there is lots of help out there when you’re ready to find it, it won’t be easy but this is a very normal very common thing your going through

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Sounds like postnatal depression - please speak to your Dr, as they can put things into place to help you xx

The most horrible part is the lack of awareness. So many people live with those feeling, without realizing it can be treated.

wysegirl 24

Truth. I had it with my second son. while I recognized it my doctor told me I was overreacting

Yeah you don’t have to keep living like this, there is lots of help out there when you’re ready to find it, it won’t be easy but this is a very normal very common thing your going through

this is more common than you think, it's just taboo and most parents won't admit it. speak to your doctor, there's likely a medical reason for this and your OB can help.

MomofTwins 15

Sounds like PPD, as others are saying. After I gave birth to my twins, I couldn't even look at them or touch them until the next day. Our bodies go through soooooo... much. I can't imagine how hard IVF can be, and to go through it twice... Please get support, both with your baby and your feelings. It'll get better, I promise.

I can absolutely imagine myself feeling this way after having a kid, so I make sure that it will never happen. I think people have this idea in their head of how things are 'supposed' to be and everything will be fine. But in reality, some people just can't do it. Get help, and don't let your child grow up in that atmosphere. Adoption is an option also.

I wish I could do a thumbs down like 100X on this.

Don't project your own anger. This sounds alot more like PPD than like "not wanting kids." Some fantastic moms I know went through this - and not just post pardum, but some had this during their pregnancy. One said: "It is strange to want and to love something so much while also hating it with every cell of my body." Another: "I adore her, but I make a point of talking about how much I hated my daughter when she was born and being real about my pregnancy, because people don't, and I thought I was the only one who hated everything about it for so long." Either time or medication relieved this symptom in my friends, and they're all wonderful mums now.

Please talk to someone, if possible a doctor. This is conman and you can get help. Don’t suffer

Postpartum Depression is surprisingly common. I hope you find a therapist who can help you.

Lovely, you will get no judgement from me. Take a breath, you will be okay. The IVF process isn't easy and you probably have unresolved trauma from the stress of everything. Book an appointment with your doctor, so they can forward you onto someone you can talk to. Your feelings are real, and valid. x

Not messed up, you got postpartum. Happens to a lot of woman actually

Literally linked my account to come here and echo the others. Talk to your doctor about how you feel. If they judge you or refuse to help then demand another opinion. You are worth advocating for and so is your child. PPD is much more common than people talk about. You are valuable. Take care of yourself.