Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. When he slid his penis in, he felt my NuvaRing, and with the most excitement I've ever seen a man muster, said, "Oh my god! You have your clit pierced! I can't believe I actually get to have sex with a girl who has her clit pierced!" FML
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Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, while my boyfriend was fingering me, he accidentally pulled out my NuvaRing, he then licked it off and placed it back inside me. FML
Today, I had sex with my new boyfriend for the first time. Afterwards, he said, "I know women who would be really self-conscious about nipples like that. I love that you accept yourself." I had no clue there was anything odd about my nipples. FML
Today, my boyfriend was about to go down on me as foreplay before losing his virginity and he actually poked my clitoris and said, "What’s this thing?" FML
Today, my boyfriend and I got intimate with each other for the first time. He shoved his hand down my pants, touched about an inch away from my clitoris, and whispered, "Cummm" in my ear. I doubt I'll have an orgasm ever again. FML
Today, my boyfriend proposed. He gave me a really unique ring that I absolutely loved… at first. When I showed it off to my friends, one of them laughed so hard that she started crying, and said it looks just like a vagina. She's right, and now I can't unsee it. FML
Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. As he came, he yelled "FIRST, BITCHES!" FML
Today, I finally had sex with my boyfriend. I had never gotten so far with a guy, so I was really nervous. He was careful, we tried different positions, "it was fun" and he came. I barely felt anything. FML
Today, I shaved my vagina for the first time ever. Had sex with my husband and then asked if he liked that. He said, "You've done that before, though". I haven't. We've been married 15 years. FML
Today, while I was having sex with my girlfriend, I was struck with a white-hot pain, and in the confusion thought her vagina had contracted hard. It turned out it was actually my uncircumcised penis retracting for the first time in my life. FML
Today, I finally felt ready to make love to my boyfriend for the first time. It all went great, until I tried putting the condom on him. In the process, I managed to nick his penis not once, but three times with my nails. His eyes brimmed with tears and he completely lost his erection. FML
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Top comments
WCARlover 35
I think the real FML is that you guys apparently didn't do any foreplay
carleybeak 21
I think it might be time for him to learn some female anatomy...
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Comments (93)
stayydomii 21
WHERE'S THE CLIT?! It must be inside hiding.
AWildFresh 19
In his defense, my 15 year old virgin self thought that the g spot and clit were the same thing. I've since learned the difference
anaheimangels40 11
You must have the all time dumbest boyfriend! How can this moron be inside you and feel your nuva ring and mistake it for a clit piercing at the top of your vulva? Breakup with him, every time he is inside you, he will get dumber!
RinoaHeartilly 36
This is so not a reason to dump someone.
lantz4levi 19
No where, in your entire incoherent speech did you make any sense. You are awarded no points, and may god have mercy upon your soul.
asta626 5
that's just wow... you should tell him the truth. that and where the clit is (why do guys have such issues finding it??). he might be disappointed but honesty is better.
darkshadus 10
The men who actually care about their female partners pleasure would find out where the clit is located and at least try to be good at foreplay. Or they could be lucky like me and have had a lesbian couple who wanted to experiment with a man show me how to do it right
young_cat_lady 17
lol either way why would he want to have Sex with someone with a pierced clit lol?
young_cat_lady 17
I don't see what the huge deal is with a pierced clit
DravensTheName 16
It might have to deal with the stereotype that girls with piercings down there are freaky or more into kinky stuff. But besides that I really couldn't think of anything else.
dbt88 15
Verrrrry few people have pierced clits anyway. They're hood piercings. Yes, I have to be technical.
DravensTheName 16
I didn't know the technical term till you said it, so thank you. I'll keep that in mind for next time.
kristinjeaneen 21
Please tell me you taught him about the female anatomy. He clearly needs it. No one deserves to have bad sex. It's amazing how much sex can improve just when a guy knows where a clit is.
burntntattered 13
I'm sure I would have died laughing right there with his penis inside me, going flaccid from shame
ThrottleJockey 36
My private used to stand at attention. Now he just hangs his head in shame.
ThrottleJockey 36
At least he's heard of the ********? Just show him and, if he's willing to learn, will have you writhing in euphoria in no time. Not everyone starts out as a master. Masterbator, maybe.
Isamermaid 17
If he was just "sticking it on in," I'm confused about how he managed to get his hand so far up your ****** to feel your NuvaRing. Also feel sad for you that he didn't even touch your real ******** before putting it in. Geeze.
XanderFierce 11
it says "penis", but "penis" and "hand" are very similar, I understand your confusion.
DravensTheName 16
The amount of times i jacked off my hand thinking it was my penis is ridiculous. It's just too damn similar!!
Isamermaid 17
No one even tried to understand what I was saying..... "Let's just be dicks and treat her like she's f-cking stupid!" "Yeah!" I think the reactions say more about you than they do about me. Alrighty. And now to move on with my life.
mariri9206 32
They probably could have been more diplomatic about it or said it nicer, but your first sentence doesn't actually make sense and you have two different subjects that don't connect. By "sticking it on in" no one is talking about his hand so that shouldn't even be in your first sentence. And, because your first sentence doesn't make sense, your second sentence doesn't really connect to what you're trying to say, which I'm baffled as to what that is. There's nothing to try and understand about your comment because of the fact that you have two different subjects colliding in the first sentence and it's hard to tell what your point is.
DravensTheName 16
54, Yeah me making a joke on a not so serious website really shows more about me than your incoherent/dumb post. Get real girl I wasn't making fun of you. Don't be so defensive.