Today, I had food poisoning. When I was finally able to drag myself to the kitchen for some Gatorade, I got stung by a wasp. FML
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Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, after struggling with anorexia for months, I got food poisoning. FML
Today, after a week of staying in at night and fighting off a persistent cold, I was finally feeling well again, so I decided to go to my boyfriend's work BBQ. I got food poisoning. FML
Today, I got food poisoning from my wedding food. FML
Today, this huge wasp started flying around me. I freaked out and started running from it. Then I slipped, landed face-first in some dog poo, and got stung by the wasp on my leg. FML
Today, there was a gigantic wasp in my room. It stupidly flew upwards and got hit by the rotating fan. It then immediately decided to take it's revenge by stinging me. FML
Today, I was stung by a red wasp. While my husband heroically killed it, I, the person terrified of wasps after being swarmed as a child, collapsed, sobbed, screamed, and almost vomited from sheer terror. Give me snakes, spiders, insects galore and I am fine. Single flying asshole of doom and I turn into a child. FML
Today, there was a wasp tangled in my bed sheets. I found this out when I rolled over it in my sleep, and it stung me on the lower back. FML
Today, I went out to eat to celebrate getting over the stomach flu. I hadn't eaten solid food in over a week, so I was really excited and ordered my favorite dish. It gave me food poisoning. FML
Today, my friend bet everyone at my lunch table that no one could catch the fly that was flying around our table. I reached up and caught it. It was a wasp, and it stung me. FML
Today, I was stuck on a bus for an hour with a wasp buzzing around. I have a severe phobia of wasps. I was crying by time I reached my destination. FML
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Top comments
linyah 11
gatorade helps replenish the electorlytes one has loss. Plus after food poisoning you dehydrate fast. It helps =) what i would like to know is why you are stealing from a wasp?
Il_Maestro 6
Ooh! My turn! No one sings as well as Justin Bieber.
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Comments (62)
TheyCallMeDamien 18
Are you Catholic? (yeah I know that joke is a stretch)
thiscrazything 1
That's one of those days you should have just stayed in bed. Hope you feel better soon.
Il_Maestro 6
Ooh! My turn! No one sings as well as Justin Bieber.
missragdoll 0
Why does dumb stuff like this get posted but some of us actually have good fmls that never get published? No offense op but shouldn't you have family or friends to help if you're that sick?
THE_A_TEEN 28
The FML moderators have the power to post whatever they want. Take it up with them instead of whining "Why doesn't my FML's get posted, WWWWAAAAHHHHH".
uhnevermind 24
Don't get upset because someone else's FML was posted and not yours. They can't post the 1000s of FMLs that come in every day.
blutigenbonbon 10
Lmao xD you're cute xD
hateevryone 15
How will Gatorade help with food poisoning?
hazardmuffin 21
It helps to rehydrate the body and replace electrolytes.
asnakelovinbabe 16
There is a salmonella outbreak concerning a large amount of pet food. If I were you, I'd get checked out if you have any pets.
poohappens26 0
That's a shitty situation
OffToTheGayBar 9
Holy shit snacks, you threw me for a loop there and now I'm laughing so hard aliens abducted me.
kandi_kid69 15
2- I wanna join in this conversation cake.