Today, I had a pig kidney dissection in Biology. I see a 'sack' which appeared to contain a liquid. Being the curious type, I cut open the sack, spraying said liquid over me and my desk. My teacher, after giggling, informed me that the liquid was in fact urine. I was pissed on by a dead pig. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, as I was teaching my 10th grade biology honors class, a student came in with a dead frog and asked if we could dissect it. He tried to toss it to me and missed, so it landed in a girl's lap. She threw up all over me. FML
Today, I was dissecting a pig for my anatomy class. The smell of four day-old dead pig caused me to faint. My mom drove me home and warmed me up some left overs for lunch. It was pork chops. FML
Today, I was teaching my microbiology lab class as a graduate TA. Some dumbass frat boy dared his friend to drink a tube of E. coli and the idiot did it. Now everything in the lab is contaminated with vomit. FML
Today, my professor tried to scare the hiccups out of me. Some pee came out instead. FML
Today, I threw up in bio when we dissected cow hearts. Guess that rules out my childhood passion as a possible career. FML
Today, I was really excited to be observing my first autopsy for my forensics class. Apparently so was the guy behind me. He barfed up ramen noodles all over my hair and back. I couldn't leave the room to clean up. For two hours. FML
Today, I arrived at work early. I noticed the plants on the side of my classroom could use some water so I went out to do so. On the way, I found a beer can. Not wanting the kids to see it, I picked it up but some spilled on my dress. I quickly noticed a familiar smell. No, not beer. Urine. FML
Today, while working at my new job at a veterinary hospital, I was excited that I set a urinary catheter in a dog for the first time. I guess I was a little too enthusiastic though, because I pulled it out too fast and bloody urine splashed up all over my face. FML
Today, I'd started dialysis and the cap at the end of my PD tube came off. It’s meant to stop infection, and it’s filled with betadine. I said I had to go to the office. My teacher wouldn’t let me, so I walked out of class. I got detention for trying to prevent getting a major infection. FML
Today, my college roommate is a Studio Art major. For a project, she brought home a pig's intestine to keep in our tiny dorm room freezer. FML
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Top comments
john_bell 0
Did you seriously think that there would be something good in that sack.
kitties_fml 12
dude. you don't just go around slicing open sacks of liquid in dead pigs. YDI
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Comments (104)
cowinvasion 0
Hey, at least the "sac" wasn't the cecum.
iKaite 0
OP should get a medal, Dissections are gross enough anyway. I remember in my school we once had to disect a cow eyeball, i cut it too hard, it pinged off the desk and hit my friend in the face. Oh and OP is British also so he is cool. Peace up XD
LemonFairy 0
OP did get a medal. It's next to their username when they post. XD
Seni_Seviyorum_fml 0
Eyeball? Eww. xP Hahah Yeah, we English tend to be cool. Hardly close to what most Americans assume. Remember Sid Vicious? Most of us hate the Royal Family. xD except old people for some reason.
iKaite 0
Touché, well spotted. All hail OP XD
mookie345 0
FYL xD that sucks that you didn't know what it was. Next time ask before you do that stuff LOL
ColdGold 6
Maybe a sharper tool was needed.
i_is_a_tr00l 0
...At least it wasn't his baby-making liquid.
sjp092 0
I bet even the pig laughed at you. Hehe
FruityLoooons 8
Yeah, because dead pigs can totally laugh.
kile88 2
the pig didn't piss on you, you bathed in the piss.. why the **** would you spray unknown bodily juice on everyone?
Ipreferbroccoli 0
Overachiever. Lol I would've probably done the same thing. Love the last sentence. And London. Whoa, that was unnecessary.
Yaridovich23 0
Why would you cut it open anyway!?