Today, I had a girl come over to my house that I had been texting for four days. I asked her what she wanted to do and she replied "take a nap". Becoming really excited I lead her to my bedroom and went to the hiding spot for my condoms, she was serious about the nap. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, a girl invited me over to her dorm room at 3 AM. For some reason, I thought it would be a good idea to respond to e-mails just before. She said she was tired and then went to bed. I'm a fucking idiot. FML
Today, my girlfriend of over a year woke me up at 4:30 in the morning by sticking her hand down my pants. She immediately stopped when I was awake enough to reciprocate and said, "I couldn't sleep. I was bored. Talk to me." FML
Today, I was spending the night at my fiancé's house. He knew my period was about to start, so he asked if he needed to put a tarp down on the bed. He was dead serious. FML
Today, I asked my dad if my girlfriend could sleep over. He winked at me and agreed. When I brought her home, we went to my room for a quickie. There, I saw that my dad had taped multiple Richard Simmons posters to the wall, causing my girlfriend to suddenly come down with a "headache." FML
Today, my girlfriend came over to my place, looking drop dead gorgeous. However, she preferred the idea of sleeping, and here I am on my laptop. FML
Today, my girl and I were in bed trying to nap before class. She kept tossing and turning, obvious signs that she was having no luck. Sweetly, I ask her if there was anything I could do to help her relax. She says "you can tell me a story about your day, that always puts me to sleep". FML
Today, my girlfriend of two years called me over late at night. I got excited, assuming she finally wanted sex. No, she just wanted me to make her mac and cheese and talk to her because she was ‘restless’. FML
Today, I recently started seeing a girl and I slept over at her house for the first time. Apparently, I still talk in my sleep. This morning she told me I whispered, "I love you so much." FML
Today, I went to work things out with my girlfriend, with whom I'd had a huge fight with. She told me the night before to come over at noon and that she would be awake. I unlocked the door to see that the place was a mess. She'd thrown a party and was still passed out naked next to her boss. FML
Today, I got to meet the guy that I have been talking to over a dating website. We were having a great time, at least until I managed to randomly fall asleep in front of him. I spent the rest of the day sending text messages trying to explain to him that I suffer from narcolepsy. FML
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Top comments
lucky0514 0
WTF is wrong with you people... "texting" for four days and you wanna have sex with her? YDIYDIYDI
Neferria 0
Wait, why did she want to come to your place for a nap?
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Comments (173)
notlovingit 0
THANK YOU exactly my point!!!
junjouromantica 0
take a nap 4 up, 1 down To "hook up"; to "sleep with" someone. Intercourse. Originated in Dallas, TX after the millenium, but before that song "I'ma put you to bed" came out.
cheeseburgerplz 0
YDI for being a perv. Not everyone wants to have sex with you.
lovelymistake23 0
In what universe does "I want to take a nap" really mean "I want to have sex?" If I said "I want to watch a movie" that could be code for having sex...but I'm pretty straight forward and don't usually sugar coat things (RichYungReverse....not all girls always speak in code).
spoo 24
dang, I hope nobody hires OP as a babysitter
letitbe56 0
Boys, I know this idea might be really wild, but sometimes a girl really DOES want to nap, or watch a movie, or study, or whatever else you decided was code for sex. Heck, even if she said, "Let's make out" it doesn't mean you need to get out condoms. YDI for assuming.
TPandaManT 0
But guys just think they are SO good at assuming! Think is the operative word.
Tchernov9 0
Dude YDI for inviting a girl you texted for only 4 days and thought you would have sex with her right when you meet her, she might be a cheating AIDS diseased ridden *****!
Delilahlilah 0
Actually, from this post, the OP sounds more likely to be the one with AIDS. Op, YDI for being a stupid *****. Because you know someone for four days that mean they want to have sex with you? You're an idiot, and people like you annoy me.
krispykreem 0
You've been texting for four whole days?! And she just wanted to take a nap? Blasphemy! YDI...
jcooplsu11 0
BURN!!!
MyLifeIsOneBigFM_fml 0
All I can say is she's just not that into you.
halflife3isreal 0
Naps don't equal sex dumbass
somethingawesome 9
YDI for not knowing that she was serious.