FML : Today, I asked my dad if my girlfriend could sleep over. He winked at me and agreed. When I brought her home, we went to my room for a quickie. There,...

183

Today, I asked my dad if my girlfriend could sleep over. He winked at me and agreed. When I brought her home, we went to my room for a quickie. There, I saw that my dad had taped multiple Richard Simmons posters to the wall, causing my girlfriend to suddenly come down with a "headache." FML

I agree, your life sucks

You deserved it

By cockblocked - / Friday 11 May 2012 18:29 / United States - Goose Creek

Love

Add a comment

You must be logged in to be able to post comments!

Create my account Sign in

Top comments

By greeneye_fml | 12

#4421395 - Friday 11 May 2012 22:24

Cockblocked by Richard Simmons.

By SkoomaKi | 25

#4421423 - Friday 11 May 2012 22:27

Troll dad always wins! Unless put against Troll mom.

Comments

By greeneye_fml | 12

#4421395 - Friday 11 May 2012 22:24

Cockblocked by Richard Simmons.

nofearjenshere | 12

#4421517 - Friday 11 May 2012 22:44

Richard Simmons wants that cock all to himself. ;)

ICastillo | 24

#4421534 - Friday 11 May 2012 22:48

Haha troll dad strikes again. Dude just tell her your in to exercising and you will give her the ride of her life.

MrSassypants | 31

#4421560 - Friday 11 May 2012 22:51

#23 What kind of douchebag and stupid pick up line is that?

ICastillo | 24

#4421594 - Friday 11 May 2012 22:56

Not a pick up line dumb ass, that's what he could of told her after she saw the Richard Simmons poster.

Shrike | 22

#4421631 - Friday 11 May 2012 23:02

"Tell her YOUR in"? "Could OF told"? Seriously? I doubt she'd want to fuck someone who sounds like he flunked remedial English.

MrSassypants | 31

#4421652 - Friday 11 May 2012 23:06

Well it technically isn't a pick up line but yet it is still a statement full of douchbaggyness (yeah stupid word, I know) and pretty stupid. It's basically saying "Well let me say how good I am in bed and get you to have sex with me!"

starbucksguy | 16

#4421668 - Friday 11 May 2012 23:08

Douchbaggyness is a pretty cool word...I might start using it...

MrSassypants | 31

#4421690 - Friday 11 May 2012 23:14

Sorry, I already had it trademarked. You need to pay me 5 cents every time you use it.

KiddNYC1O | 20

#4421781 - Friday 11 May 2012 23:33

I was raped here once for using the word "douchebagish".

maxmex13 | 7

#4422664 - Saturday 12 May 2012 2:50

44 - whoever came up with that trademark stuff is full of douchbaggyness :)

Wow_FYL_BIZNITCH | 7

#4422797 - Saturday 12 May 2012 3:44

Headaches are a bad excuse for not having sex. Women orgasms secrete a painkilling hormone that will get rid of that headache. Little FF, for y'all.

dominic1221 | 6

#4422808 - Saturday 12 May 2012 3:48

Yeah and few women can actually consistently attain orgasm, even when they leave the pleasuring to someone who knows what they're doing, ie themselves. Little FF for ya, junior.

RaggleFrock | 13

#4423017 - Saturday 12 May 2012 5:12

Did anyone else think Gene Simmons?

mfjkr | 10

#4423175 - Saturday 12 May 2012 6:23

Use Douchenozzle, sounds better.

melikesfml | 11

#4423192 - Saturday 12 May 2012 6:33

This fml is so freaking wierd.

digitaljunky | 5

#4423496 - Saturday 12 May 2012 8:49

Yeah.. All that neon spandex would give anyone a headache!

Spanik | 10

#4423675 - Saturday 12 May 2012 9:52

105- that's if the man gives the woman orgasm-worthy sex!

yaya1213 | 6

#4426214 - Saturday 12 May 2012 22:16

It's not a pick up line if he already has her

MerrikBarbarian | 9

#4429808 - Sunday 13 May 2012 19:09

105- try having sex before you offer advise about it. Sex can help a migraine yes, if the woman orgasms. It does shit all for a sinus head ache and makes a tension head ache worse. Also I dunno about you, but the last thing I want to do is have sex when I feel like I'm gonna hurl from pain

tjv3 | 10

#4431247 - Monday 14 May 2012 1:40

I think I like your dad.

emmy627 | 2

#4439426 - Tuesday 15 May 2012 22:34

HAHA!

_krystallynn_ | 11

#4987213 - Sunday 30 September 2012 8:55

why is everybody so obsessed with proper grammar on this site?

By jackal181 | 7

#4421400 - Friday 11 May 2012 22:24

BOOM! Roasted

lopsop | 12

#4421771 - Friday 11 May 2012 23:32

Roast? Where's seth macfarland? And who's getting roasted? Is it Charlie sheen again?

JTthePurpleNinja | 5

#4424419 - Saturday 12 May 2012 13:53

Is that a Jenna marbles quote ?!

bab_chik25 | 1

#4424859 - Saturday 12 May 2012 16:27

It's from that show the office

By RockN | 10

#4421404 - Friday 11 May 2012 22:24

Ummmm...lol!

b0ngs | 7

#4421732 - Friday 11 May 2012 23:21

Really? Umm? Thats all you can think of?

MrSassypants | 31

#4421770 - Friday 11 May 2012 23:30

Ummmm......... yes!

Sydney92 | 3

#4422041 - Saturday 12 May 2012 0:35

thank you all for contributing to this fml. you can go home now.

By jackii1313 | 9

#4421410 - Friday 11 May 2012 22:24

Your dad sure has a sense of humor! Haha

Nightwing98 | 22

#4423227 - Saturday 12 May 2012 6:54

This is the funniest FML I've read in a long time!

kira_the_boss | 1

#4425265 - Saturday 12 May 2012 18:03

No, his dad just couldn't find room to put up the posters in his own bedroom.

By 04chevyshortbed | 0

#4421416 - Friday 11 May 2012 22:25

Loool

nofearjenshere | 12

#4421507 - Friday 11 May 2012 22:41

Poool

SkoomaKi | 25

#4421578 - Friday 11 May 2012 22:54

Foool

THE_A_TEEN | 27

#4421638 - Friday 11 May 2012 23:03

Toool!

DobiesJS2012 | 9

#4421826 - Friday 11 May 2012 23:43

Stoool

JoeRogansBEARD | 15

#4422053 - Saturday 12 May 2012 0:37

Coool

yetanotherginger | 19

#4422268 - Saturday 12 May 2012 1:13

Too many negative votes, comment buried. Show the comment

GroovyGravy | 7

#4422425 - Saturday 12 May 2012 1:48

Droool?

nado13579 | 12

#4422524 - Saturday 12 May 2012 2:13

Boool

(Yes, bool is actually a word)

TheMysticSilas | 0

#4423206 - Saturday 12 May 2012 6:42

ghoul :D

mattorama | 15

#4424942 - Saturday 12 May 2012 16:45

Gruel

luckyd880 | 12

#4428536 - Sunday 13 May 2012 11:06

Well this is just getting out of hand.....

By simcop2387 | 10

#4421419 - Friday 11 May 2012 22:25

Where did he get the posters to begin with?

kissandcontrol01 | 20

#4421514 - Friday 11 May 2012 22:44

Riiight!! He must have been saving em

amandajlucas2015 | 2

#4421779 - Friday 11 May 2012 23:33

Or he went n bought them at the store???

luckyd880 | 12

#4450640 - Friday 18 May 2012 9:41

Not everyone has Richard Simmons posters lying around?..

vintage3113 | 6

#4473166 - Wednesday 23 May 2012 21:18

Someone must have done the same thing to him haha

By SkoomaKi | 25

#4421423 - Friday 11 May 2012 22:27

Troll dad always wins! Unless put against Troll mom.

SmokingUnicorn | 8

#4421959 - Saturday 12 May 2012 0:12

Trolling woman? Oh god. we are fucked.

GracesDelirium | 9

#4429795 - Sunday 13 May 2012 18:55

Yep.

By djxerxes9000 | 18

#4421441 - Friday 11 May 2012 22:30

You can't be cockblocked by Richard Simmons, he loves the cock.

By GroovyGravy | 7

#4421447 - Friday 11 May 2012 22:31

I could use some Richard Simmons posters

By vbmg152 | 18

#4421449 - Friday 11 May 2012 22:31

Ha ha ha!!! YDI!!

I agree, your life sucks

You deserved it

Today, my boyfriend and his bandmates were doing a live interview for a web show. Drunk off his ass, my boyfriend starts telling the internet how his ex-girlfriend is his biggest inspiration. I was standing right next to him. FML

I agree, your life sucks

You deserved it

By Btwigster - / Tuesday 19 July 2011 01:20 / United States

Today, I slept over at my boyfriend's house and he offered to give me a massage, as he'd found a book on sensual massage and wanted to test it out on me....

I agree, your life sucks

You deserved it

Love

Nearly

Today, my boyfriend and I got into a massive argument because I suggested he should get a part-time job while studying. The same boyfriend that i have...

I agree, your life sucks

You deserved it

Today, my boss told me she doesn't care if customers complain and told me I needed to leave my desk with a line of 10+ people waiting to be helped because...

I agree, your life sucks

You deserved it

See all the Nearly FMLs

World

Loading data…

Canada

Today, my girlfriend kept texting me while I was at work, insisting for hours that I leave early because she was so horny. After arguing with my boss and...

Australia

Today, I asked the guy of my dreams out to the cinema. After saying to me "It's a date!" I started booking tickets. He said, "Why are you booking two?"...

See all the World FMLs

Photos

See all FML photos