Today, I had a dream I was going the bathroom. I then woke up peeing, but I didn’t wet the bed yet. As I ran to the bathroom while half asleep and in the dark, I rammed into the wall. On my way back to bed, I tripped and accidentally slapped my fiancé in an effort to stop myself from falling over. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I woke up because I really had to pee. I got out of bed, went to the bathroom and went back to bed. Or so I thought. I did pee, but I only dreamed that I got out of bed. FML
Today, I stood up too quickly and got dizzy, so I sat on the edge of the bed to regain my balance. I started dozing off to sleep again, got confused, and peed down the side of my bed thinking I was on the toilet. FML
Today, I woke up with a pounding headache. My wife tells me that last night I woke up from a nightmare, screaming, tried to run away, and knocked myself out running headfirst into the bedroom wall. So she put me back to bed and went back to sleep. FML
Today, I dreamed that I got so nervous during a toast at my friend's wedding that I pissed myself. To coax myself to wake up, I took off my dress, stripped down to my underwear, and pinched myself. I wasn't dreaming. FML
Today, I was house-sitting for my friend. He was late to return and I ended up falling asleep on the couch and having a dream where I violently shat myself and suddenly developed a six-pack. When I woke up, I found the dream was half true. FML
Today, I had to take a serious piss. I started urinating and leaned back slightly on my heels. Somehow I lost my balance and fell backward, hitting my head on the wall behind me and spraying myself and my entire bathroom with my own pee. FML
Today, I couldn't sleep. I had to pee really badly but I'm terrified of the dark, so I closed my eyes all the way to the bathroom. On the way, I tripped over my dog and fell face-first into the door frame. He then humped me as my nose bled all over the floor. FML
Today, I got out of bed and went to the bathroom. At least, I thought I did, until I woke up to my pants, sheets, and boyfriend all soaking wet. FML
Today, I had a dream in which I was throwing up. Turns out it wasn’t a dream and I woke up to puke all over the bed. FML
Today, I dreamt that I was using the toilet. The toilet was a dream, but the rest wasn't. My pants were soaked. FML
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Top comments
xXSweetNightmare 0
haha, wow
Goaliebeast 0
you fail
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Comments (229)
Taurus_ChicKa 37
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! This just made my night. You were peeing your pants yet somehow you didn't wet the bed? And didn't hit the floor when you hit the wall? Kudos to you. You slapped your fiance in the face because you tripped? Ouch...did he wake up?
lavaga 0
and what can make us so sure that you are?!?
autumn16 0
88 what are yu responding too?
autumn16 0
but it's about to go off sooo.. (: yay lol
2hoesNaBagel 0
haha i don't really know? it gets boring on our bus so I got this app on my phone
haha1233221jk 0
this is great because saying your about to get married indacates your 2 old to pee the bed :D
lavaga 0
To "what makes you so sure I'm not".
2hoesNaBagel 0
hahah I'm oli
Ripunzel 0
haha slappin her makes it a win
sammiller4 3
lolol I think oli is a little too busy to be chatting on fml