Today, I got yelled at and called a pedo by a mother after I sat down in a swing next to her daughter. I was too embarrassed to tell her that I'm a 20 year old who really does enjoy swinging in my spare time. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I took my son to the playground and watched him have fun. Minutes later, I was being shoved around and called a pedophile because I was there alone with no wife. By the time I convinced them I was innocent, my son was bawling. FML
Today, I got pushed around by several suspicious mothers in a playground. I just wanted to sit down and rest my feet while I waited for my wife to finish her shopping across the street. FML
Today, while shopping, I saw a little girl and her mom. The girl was pouting so I tried to cheer her up by asking her if she was a princess, because she was so pretty. She smiled but her mom looked at me with disgust and told me to, "Get lost, pedo." I'm a 17-year-old girl. FML
Today, I enjoyed a romantic evening at home with my husband while a babysitter took care of my 5-year-old daughter. After she came home, she told me the sitter let her use her "weird swing." I wasn't too worried, until she said it was indoors, and I realized she was describing a sex swing. FML
Today, I met and asked a cute girl out on a date. We decided to meet at a fancy restaurant downtown. When I got there I saw her sitting with what turned out to be her parents. They made a huge scene, calling me a pedophile and a low-life. Apparently, the girl was 16 years-old. I'm 25. FML
Today, while at McDonald's, I saw an 8 year-old girl licking a life-size Ronald McDonald sitting on a bench. Being concerned, I told her mother, who then yelled at me for 10 minutes for being a "paedophile" and "being turned on by an 8 year-old girl." FML
Today, I went to my local pool. I lay down in a chair and started tanning. About 30 minutes later, a lady came up to me and said, "Put that away, you pervert, there are children here!" I had a hole in my pants and my penis had started to poke through. FML
Today, while in line at the supermarket, I told the lady behind me that she had a cute baby. She shot me a disgusted look and straight up accused me of being a pedophile. FML
Today, I was told off by a random woman who said that I should be ashamed of myself for dating such an older man. I was having dinner with my dad. FML
Today, my child was refusing to leave the playground. I had to pry her, screaming and crying, from the monkey bars. I then realized I had been assaulting someone else's kid. FML
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Top comments
Gigiluv28 0
Why can't 20 year olds enjoy swinging? There's nothing wrong with that
Bobissmall 13
Welcome to the real world, where every male is a pedo...
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Comments (168)
MaxG123 8
Pedo.
phatdaddy62 23
Yeah. What does that bitch think she's doing taking her kid to a playground. Clearly the playground is for 20 year olds!
graphicstyle7 17
I am 50, and I think being on a swing is fun. So there.... it's good exercise also.
imaghostbusteryo 1
grow a pair!
mistyshaiah 3
So, I'm 27 and I do this too (and have for most of my life). I find it to be good stress relief. But, I'm also a chick, OP doesn't have a gender indicated, but I'm assuming a guy? OP's situation reminds me of how (at least some) day cares have extra restrictive rules for male employees. OP should have stood up for himself though. Not too hard to say, "I just like to swing" even for us shy folk.
ForTheWin23 1
WTF? It's not like you sat "ON" her kid? What's wrong with people lol
fyl7899 12
Pedos are men! I wouldnt feel creeped if a chick was with my kid. If a guy was, hell no
nvo 6
Maybe focus on early evening hours instead? Most little kids are gone by 5-6 pm - also, you wouldn't make them wait their turn longer than necessary.
icanthealu 0
I like to swing too
ThatEmoVeganChic 0
That qoman sounds like a bitch