Miscellaneous: Today, I got in trouble for shooting my paintball gun at a piece...

By no - 17/11/2014 02:26 - United States

Today, I got in trouble for shooting my paintball gun at a piece of wood, so my dad told me to go wash it. While I was washing it, he shot me several times in the back, yelling, "That's payback for being born." FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 641

You deserved it 4 002

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 30/08/2015 15:44 - United States

Today, while I was pulling weeds, my dad thought it would be absolutely hilarious to yell "Hey, son!" then unload his gun at me when I turned around. After I'd screamed like a bitch and pissed myself, he broke down into hysterical laughter and said he'd loaded the gun with blanks. Fuck you, dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 581

You deserved it 2 558

By nl4 - 01/11/2013 23:55 - Israel - Tel Aviv

Today, my family got together for a big game of paintball. My grandpa wanted to play too, but I told him he was a bit too old for such a rough sport. He joined anyway, and spent the whole 2 hours hunting my dumb ass down. I'm now in constant pain after being riddled with paintballs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 904

You deserved it 56 261

By iusedprotectionanyway - 21/03/2014 21:44 - New Zealand - Waitakere

Today, I went to a paintball match with my family and the family of my brother's girlfriend. A few minutes into, my brother's girlfriend's dad snuck up on me, unloaded into me from behind, and snarled, "That's for knocking my daughter up." He got the wrong guy. My back is killing me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 233

You deserved it 3 513

By walllflower - 08/02/2015 19:46 - Canada - Saint Catharines

Today, I went paintballing with my siblings. Once we were done, they realised I hadn't been shot at all. They cornered me in the forest and lit me up. I have welts all over my legs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 025

You deserved it 4 389

By srhoa01 - 05/07/2016 06:42

Today, while at school, some jerk shot me in the foot with a BB gun. While in agonizing pain, I yelled, "FUCK" as loud as possible. A teacher walked by, oblivious to the fact I had just been shot with a BB gun and wrote me up for, "Disrespectful language". FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 332

You deserved it 1 608

By ohcrap - 02/08/2011 04:58 - United States

Today, my son drew in Sharpie all over the wall, so I spanked him as punishment. When my boss came over for dinner, my son shouted, "Daddy made me take my punishment in the butt." FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 484

You deserved it 16 131

By Anonymous - 26/12/2014 14:58 - United States - Commack

Today, I went paintballing with my girlfriend and her family. Her dad ended up shooting me, and I doubled over in pain. I thought that was it, until he stepped back and shot me several more times in the stomach. "Just double-tapping," he smirked. More like quadruple-tapping. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 803

You deserved it 3 660

Sorry, I…

By signupsheetfail - 12/08/2009 19:02 - Canada

Today, I was doing target practice with my new paintball pistol. One of the bullets missed, and hit my new neighbor's house. I went up to the door to apologize, not realizing I was still holding the paintball gun. My ex-soldier neighbor thought I was robbing him and put me in a chokehold. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 878

You deserved it 41 900

By just me - 13/05/2012 18:54 - Germany - Overath

Today, I argued heavily with my dad over being dragged to a family game of lacrosse. All through the game, he kept "accidentally" hurling the ball straight at me on the sideline. After he eventually nailed me straight in the heart, he screamed at me to "get out of the fucking way". FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 195

You deserved it 3 481

Defense!

By ruined_suit - 17/04/2009 21:12 - United States

Today, I came home from work to find that my neighbor's trash bins were still on the curb. While returning the bins to her backyard, her kid ran out and shot me with a paintball gun. Multiple times. He thought I was a burglar and ruined my new suit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 113

You deserved it 7 130

wvni 13

Monday 17 November 2014 14:26

So your dad's issue with you is that he caused your mom to give birth to you? Alrighty then, that's a thing. Hope your back gets better soon OP.

MzZombicidal 36

Monday 17 November 2014 14:29

This FML just makes me sad :(

Comments

wvni 13

Monday 17 November 2014 14:26

So your dad's issue with you is that he caused your mom to give birth to you? Alrighty then, that's a thing. Hope your back gets better soon OP.

wallamanut 14

Monday 17 November 2014 19:50

OP should just shoot him in the balls and say "Now you don't have to worry about it happening again. you're welcome."

possy 19

Sunday 23 November 2014 1:21

Op.... Ur dads ******* awesome!!

watermelon15 35

Monday 17 November 2014 14:26

Rude parent.

devildog562 33

Monday 17 November 2014 16:11

Definitely not the pullout King.

1tsmenoah 20

Tuesday 18 November 2014 4:53

Pullout game weak af

MzZombicidal 36

Monday 17 November 2014 14:29

This FML just makes me sad :(

ChristianH39 30

Monday 17 November 2014 18:42

Same, I couldn't imagine having such a crappy parent

botanistjessica 24

Monday 17 November 2014 14:29

Wow. Obviously, that was the mature thing to do...

silvercamaro 22

Monday 17 November 2014 14:30

That makes perfect sense to me, father of the year award worthy, actually

MrDonSalvetti 27

Monday 17 November 2014 15:57

FML is not the right place to make ironic comments anymore, dude.

asnakelovinbabe 16

Monday 17 November 2014 18:25

That's not irony, that's sarcasm.

enddmd 27

Monday 17 November 2014 20:22

Well, sarcasm is a form of irony.

Bibliovore 26

Monday 17 November 2014 14:30

Wow. Okay, so, lessons learned: 1) Don't shoot a paintball gun at anything that might hurt or cause objections, and, as your father so kindly demonstrated, 2) don't be a jerk. Sorry, OP.