Today, I got attacked by my own dog. I don't know what will be harder, telling everyone how my dog thought I was a robber or explaining to them why a 25 year old man owns a poodle. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was mauled by my own dog. I own a Chihuahua. FML
Today, I went for a run, and my own dog attacked me. FML
Today, I saw a dog trying to attack a man. I have experience working with aggressive dogs, so I pulled the dog off him and got it under control. The man punched me in the face for not having my dog on a leash. It wasn't my dog. I don't even own a dog. FML
Today, a dog attacked me. Its owner, instead of apologizing and helping me, said it was my own fault for making it think I was an attacker by running past them. We were on a jogging track. FML
Today, I got mugged while walking my dog. He seemed to be OK with it. FML
Today, I was pickpocketed. I didn't realize until I stopped to get breakfast. I went back home to see that my dog had taken my wallet and had ripped and torn it up. I was pickpocketed by my own dog. FML
Today, my boyfriend's vicious dog, which he got as a security measure and growls and barks at me whenever I go near it, was caught on our security camera playing like a puppy with a burglar, while the other two burglars cleaned out all our valuables. FML
Today, I almost got attacked by a dog. The dog that occupies the same house as I do. The reason? He didn't recognize me because - get this - I was wearing a beanie. A hat made me unrecognizable to my dog. FML
Today, I was shopping when I got charged at by a really big dog, causing me to panic and fall. The store won’t do anything because the cunt of an owner lied and said it’s her “service dog.” FML
Today, my 175-pound rottweiler I've raised since a puppy watched me get jumped and robbed of my phone and money in my yard. An hour later, he hopped the fence and chased the mail man down the street after he leaned on the fence for a second. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
lyndifluff 6
the poodle doesn't bother me. but I would like to know why your dog thought you were a burglar. lol
shannonreneee 11
I am confused at why it's so hard to explain that your dog attacked you. Owning a poodle, fair enough though.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (161)
ssletner 0
why even tell anyone. how bad could it be unless u have some kind of mutant poodle...
bitheway 2
Say you got it for an ex just before she broke up with you
happy_dino 6
Well are you a rapist? 'Cause if you are, then it's alright to have a poodle at age 35! Have a nice life raping little boys!
FMLsOhilarious 6
Seriously? Now it matters what kind of dog you have? A dog is a dog. If you're so ashamed of having it give it to someone who isn't ashamed. I feel sorry for the dog, not you. YDI--and by that I mean the embarrassment of telling people you have a poodle. However you don't deserve your dog attacking you.
crmaes 0
Also there's the fact that IT'S AN EFFING POODLE! you couldn't fight off a poodle? that's just sad haha.
izawzom 0
poodles are pretty big dogs :/ it's not that surprising
StrawberryBarbie 0
tell them it's a manly poodle with dragon tattoos and a big ass Afro! or make your poodle sound pimp :)
xrainbowshadowx 17
I'm sorry your dog attacked you FYL /: By the way, there is nothing wrong with a twenty-five year old man owning a poodle!
Bootle 10
Poodles FTW!!
tonedef32884 0
You so deserve this. NO DUDE should own a poodle unless that dude sleeps with other dudes.
withindarkness 0
Eh I am not a poodle fan...but I do know a guy who is 46 and he has a standard poodle.