Today, I got ancestry DNA tests for my parents and myself. The DNA testing company informed me that I'm a 50% match for my mother but I share no DNA with my father. Apparently, both my parents forgot that they used a sperm donor. This insignificant detail has slipped their minds for 35 years. FML
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70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, we got the results of our family's ancestry DNA tests. My father isn't related to me, but my grandfather is still my grandfather. Apparently grandma cheated on grandpa to get 'dad', and my mother cheated on 'dad' with my 'uncle' to get me. FML
Today, my girlfriend of 8 years and I received our results from a DNA test. We're both very interested in history and ancestry, and wanted to see where in the world we both originated. It turns out we have the same father. FML
Today with a DNA test, I found out that my husband is my half brother. 30 years ago his father made a donation to the sperm bank my mother used, and I’m the result. To make matters worse, I’m pregnant. FML
Today, my dad's will included a DNA test he did on me when I was 3, proving I’m not his son. I thought we had a great relationship, but apparently he secretly hated me all these years for mom cheating, and decided to embarrass me in front of our family, half of whom it turns out I’m not related to. FML
Today, my sister and I decided to do one of those online DNA tests just for fun. Our mom came in, saw all the stuff on the table, and lost her mind. She started bawling and apologizing. Apparently, neither one or neither of us actually belong to my dad. FML
Today, my husband presented me with a DNA test proving that our newborn daughter isn't his. Confused, I got her tested again. She's not a match to me either. FML
Today, I took a DNA test and it turns out that the person who I thought was my dad is not my actual dad and my real dad is his best friend. FML
Today, during divorce proceedings, I decided to have my kids DNA tested. Neither of my kids are mine. My daughter's real father is unknown but my son's DNA identifies him as related to me, but not as my son, so he’s more likely my nephew, meaning his dad is one of my brothers. FML
Today, my ex mother-in-law stupidly made an offhand comment, so I got my kids DNA tested. NONE, I repeat NONE of them is mine. When I think of the thousands I’ve paid in child support I’ll never get back, and now my own mother thinks I’m an asshole for refusing to pay any further. FML
Today, I’ve suffered my whole life with a bunch of genetic conditions and I found out why at my dad's funeral. A bunch of relatives from America attended and one of them secretly told me my parents emigrated to England under a cloud of shame because they were brother and sister. I’m inbred. FML
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Top comments
FaygoAndMiracles 18
Even though it would have been best for them to tell you, maybe it just didn't matter to them because they know that the real parents are who raise you, not who you are biologically from.
iloveCS8 11
That sucks FYL! but as long as your "father" treated you with love and raised you as his own,then remember the good memories and know he loves you just as he would if you were his real son
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Comments (96)
RedPillSucks 33
35 years ago, some methods were more taboo, so parents might not have told anyone because they didn't want their kids to feel judged. The parents of the first test-tube baby (in-vito fertilization) got horrid letters from some ignorant people.
waltjrimmer 6
I'm sure that it did slip their minds, as you're their son either way. Unless, and I'm not saying this is what happened, the "sperm donor" was a stray affair that your father never knew about and they're just trying to protect you from that.
samanthahwill 2
I don't understand how you only have a 50% match with you mother. Any chimpanzee has a DNA match of over 90% with any human. Are you a mushroom?
alluringtatas 7
Boo-frickin hoo! Your parents wanted you and had trouble conceiving so they got help. So what? It doesn't make him any less your father. Let us know when you have a real problem like finding out your mailman is your dad.
skyeyez9 25
A neighbor of mine has two moms and they used a sperm donor as well. She tracked down the donor somehow and he turned out to be an arrogant, narcissistic douche. Some things are better left alone, OP.
skyeyez9 25
Also people who use sperm donors desperately want kids. I am sure you were well loved and cared for by your parents. Count your blessings.
subtulescence_fml 4
Maybe they did this test because they didn't know how to explain you this ...
skinflint 6
nice of your dad to back your moms play. sperm donor = your mom didn't know who the daddy was. guess it was the other guy.
TechFire 25
And I thought I was cynical...
greatdanen 6
it slipped their mind because the father didn't know... am I the onely one seeing this?
nikolkaw 9
Were you in Maurey or something?v