By Anonymous - 06/12/2011 06:45 - United Kingdom

Today, I found that when a hot girl asks you whether you have a girlfriend, saying, "I got 99 problems but a bitch ain't one" is not the best way to proceed. FML
I agree, your life sucks 12 044
You deserved it 75 911

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Now you got 100 problems and a bitch is one


jwade11 12

Naaaaaahhhhh really???!?!????!!!!

Sorry, double posted. Ignore this.

bitchslapped22 14

I got 99 problems but a snitch ain't one

of course he deserved that. What type of idiot would say that to a hot girl

#18 had 99 cookies but a bitch ate one

Susieee_Q 9

I wish FML's had an "Elaborate?" button.


No that one is a sure winner, I use it all the time.

Op failed big time, I am disappointed.

n_epic_fail 14

I got 99 problems and a dick is one... YDI

You wouldn't say..

Woooooooow op that is just sad... No was just to hard was it?

SouthernKiller 4

YDI totally but it's awesome none the less. If I had a hat on I'd take it off in respect.

Ydi for trying to be cool haha.

If your havin vocal problems i feel bad for son, i got 99 problems but a pitch aint

Well at least 99 problems and a bitch aint one is better than 99 bitches and they're all problems


An Enzo Ferrari! They only made 499 of them, and a 500th for the pope.

Challenge accepted

Actually SIR, that's an abbreviation!

Actually sir it is an acronym

Now you got 100 problems and a bitch is one

nixter5 18

Dude, when a hot girl is talking to you, you have to be be extra careful with what you say in those precious few minutes so you don't fuck up.

EffinToofer 3

You got 99 thumbs up, and a bitch was one!

jjames7543 13

82- But you don't...

Lol sooo goood!

checkersonsocks 0

I don't really know what you expected her reaction to be.

Susieee_Q 9

Well, I'm guessing OP was hoping the hot chick would have a sense of humor and think it was funny. Although, it was stupid of OP to assume she would have.

I dunno. I'm pretty laid back and find most things funny but I would find this guy very off putting.

Then again, you're a zombie.

Zombies have some standards.

Actually, zombies are undead corpses controlled by a disease, a pandemic, in which the disease only flourishes on other human flesh, therefor spreading the disease. You're a zombie, why don't you know this?

-- and being a disease, it has no emotion. No emotion means no feelings, and without feelings, you can not have standards.

OP, time to bring the pain

Something tells me that by the end of the night op is still goin to be a virgin....


op, if u got girl problems i feel bad for you son

Looks like you are having girl problems. I feel bad for you, son.

rexgar2000 10

if you having girl problems I feel bad for you son, I have 99 problems and this bitch is one.

I see what you did there.

46- with your rythm stick?

Haha no not with my rhythm stick. With my giant purple dildo

You have 99 likes. I thought i would just point that out for you.

rexgar2000 10

oh man! I got buried :(

Best comment ever. Hahaha XD

bballsoccerrocks 7

No really?

I guess that means you're gay

The fuck is wrong with you? |the kid|

You don't have the required reputation to have a signature on your posts. XxMikeWonderxX

nixter5 18

I wouldn't challenge a very large black man that can probably snap you in half with his balls if I were you... xXG.O.A.T.Xx O_O

*lethargically lumbers toward #31* Someone here to challenge my reputation? |the kid|

Hmm let's see... The kid: 1400 comments MikeDa1Da: 6 comments You're just like the kid who transfers to a new school for senior year and starts shit with the kids who have been there for 11... Nevermimd, fuck that metaphor. Just kindly shut the fuck up with your bullshit.

I want to touch your lumps, your lumps, your hot manly lumps. Boobs. -battlekittyofdoom-

I really really think you don't want to do that. : Me :

Haha, brilliant!