Today, I found some .pdf files on my wife's computer. They were forms that had been filled out except for the date and the "reason" section. They were divorce papers. When confronted about it she said, "Well, if you piss me off really bad, I want to write down why before I calm down." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I yelled at my girlfriend because I thought she'd thrown away an important form I needed to fill out. I found it a few minutes later, just stuck to the back of another piece of paper. After apologizing for getting mad, all she said was, "I'm used to it." FML
Today, while visiting my in-laws, I went into their home office in search of a sheet of scrap paper. Instead, I found printed copies of every email and IM my husband and I had ever sent each other, including pictures. Highlighted and annotated by his mother. FML
Today, I got a gift from my wife in the form of divorce papers. She waited till after New Year's so it wouldn't show up on her taxes for 2011. FML
Today, my wife threw my Macbook out a window and tore up important work documents, all because she saw me talking to a female colleague of mine. I confronted her about the damage, and she responded, "Go ask the bitch you were with the other day to help you with that." FML
Today, my wife got fired for leaving work early once again. She's been doing random "spot checks" for the past month, convinced that she'll catch me cheating on her. This paranoid crap is exactly why I'm filing for divorce. FML
Today, I found out that my wife sent nudie pics to her ex-husband. My wife's excuse for the pics? "I needed a compliment because I thought you didn't love me." FML
Today, my wife admitted that she purposefully starts fights with me purely because she enjoys arguing and seeing me flustered. Don't marry a lawyer. FML
Today, my wife called me at work, screaming in rage that she hated me, that I was a useless lump, that she wishes we'd never met. Did I have an affair or burn the house down? Nope. I set up the kids' backpacks for school today and forgot a library book that was due today. FML
Today, I found out why my wife has been upset with me for the last week. She told me this morning that I did something to upset her on our date night last Friday, she won't tell me what, and she said she'll leave me if I do it again. FML
Today, my wife put divorce papers in my birthday card. FML
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Top comments
the_stereotype 0
we all have our ways of coping...? if it helps, get visa papers for a foreign country and tell her you're filling them out so you can remember the reasons you want to get away from her
hahathatsux 0
you should get a membership to a dating site and when she asks why say if she's that prepared to divorce you you should be equally prepared to find someone who isn't a total bitch
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Comments (116)
romaunts 0
Well, she shouldn't do that, I assume. Of course, maybe she has tried to work out issues, and you're not helping. Maybe it's not all her, you guys. Though, threats like that are fairly petty. She should tell you in person, if you aren't working on the relationship, to either start or she's leaving... My real question is why you were on her computer, going through her files. It doesn't look like there's much faith on either end of the relationship, to me.
CheshireHalli 19
I would hope it's microscopic, considering #15 is a girl... O.o And of course her boobs would be bigger than her partner, and she's not sexist. KTHXBAI.
insomniacdude 0
Both. FYL because at the tip of that hat she could file for divorce for any reason, which could completely **** with your life just because you didn't put the toilet seat down. YDI for ******* looking through her computer files. I mean really, what the hell?
_Noon_ 0
Hahaha, am I the only one who thinks this is awesome?! I think it's a really clever way to get the frustration out of your system. She is after all still married to you.
Hazy_fml 0
...They're married, oh great and intelligent one. They have the right to know everything about each other.
romaunts 0
Yes, but that doesn't give him the right to invade her privacy. Everyone is entitled to their privacy. Also, you'll never know /everything/ about someone, and no one is entitled to know /everything/ about you. Everyone has their secrets, and no one has the right to violate that- not even if they're married. They were both in the wrong.
insomniacdude 0
45: So that means a husband can literally stalk his wife throughout her entire day, plant microphones on her so that he can better hear what she is doing and saying, and generally leave absolutely no part of her life unmonitored? No. That's insane. Just as insane as going on your wife's computer (read the FML, it wasn't a shared computer) and into her private documents. Privacy is important. Disrespect of that privacy is unforgiveable.
plexico 4
Ain't technology grand? Instead of having to go down to a boring ol' courthouse and waiting in line to get a form, you can wait until you reach the apex of your hissy-fit to instantly complete a life-changing legal document. Suh-weet!
beastio 0
@feminist19: All you're doing is perpetuating the view that people have of feminists as sexists. And I really have never met a feminist who could disprove that. Do yourself and the world a favor, and stfu. @intoxicunt: She said she's writing the reasons for divorce quickly so that she doesn't have a chance to calm down, as in she wants to divorce him, but apparently doesn't want to resolve it with him.
pshnoway 0
For all the people who said "ydi for looking through her computer files" and "why were you on her computer?" it shouldn't matter that he was on her computer because they're married and she shouldn't have anything to hide from him. Fyl for having such a bitchy and controlling wife.
Intoxicunt 6
Could be that. But I took it differently. If it was blank at the moment and she never acted on it, maybe it was her coping mechanism. I'm pretty sure if she wanted to divorce him, she would.
romaunts 0
No, she shouldn't be hiding things... but he shouldn't be looking for things, either. That itself is a show of mistrust, which doesn't belong in a marriage.
pshnoway 0
What if he was looking through the files for something he was working on? He never specified why he was looking through her files.
_Noon_ 0
Yeah, that's how I interpreted it too Intoxicunt.
feminist19 0
i will not stfu you asshole, i dont need you telling me what i can and cant comment on so mind your own business.........
feminist19 0
i had hoped someone would pick up on the hypocrisy of my last post
22jrdn55 15
y were u look in her files in the first place? YDI for being a douchebag and not divorsing her
feminist19 0
my bad, i just got a bit excited
Glam_fml 0
Please don't give out advice if you can't spell..