Today, I found out that my neighbors' 9 year old son has been the one taking a shit on my doorstep everyday. Why? Because Cartman from South Park said that if you keep doing it, the person in the house will move. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I had to call the cops on my neighbor. I was heading off to work when I saw him actually shitting in our yard. The reason? They caught my dumbass rebel of a son on their security camera, shitting in their yard. FML
Today, my 6-year-old son pooped in the back yard and used a stick to throw it over the fence into my neighbor's yard. FML
Today, I saw a kid taking a dump next to my lawn. The good news: his mother picked up the poop to discard it. The bad news: she put it in my mailbox. I now have a pile of smelly brownish tissue-wrapped goo baking under the hot sun inside my mailbox. FML
Today, I woke up to a homeless man relentlessly shitting on my porch. FML
Today, I watched as my neighbor walked to my front lawn, looked me right in the eye, and pissed on my mailbox. FML
Today, I opened my front door to go out for groceries. Lying on my doorstep was a pile of poop. A piece of paper was taped to the ground beside it that read, "Do it again and you'll get more than dog shit." I don't have the slightest clue who I pissed off, or how. FML
Today, I learned that my neighbor of 9 years has a kid. I learned this after I knocked down his snowman. FML
Today, we found out why we were getting notes on our door telling us to "move out or else." As my mom works for the government and we have a direct-TV dish on our roof, our neighbor thinks we were sent to listen to his phone calls and read his mind. We were here before he was. FML
Today, I witnessed the homeless man that visits my neighborhood placing bags containing his own poop in my trash cans. I later received a notice stating that the garbage company will not provide my residence with garbage service until I “refrain from placing bags of my own feces in the trash.” FML
Today, after weeks of asking my neighbor nicely to pick up his dog’s crap out of the common area, I got fed up and reported him to the landlord and the city. He’s now been given two options; either get rid of his dog or move out. He’s now sworn revenge on me, even though he was the one being gross. FML
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Top comments
GeekMaster6000 3
wow. Someone should beat some sense into that kid.
wazzup182FML 3
pick up his shit and rub it in his face!
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Comments (234)
autumnmoonx3 8
:D haha.
khaya 9
Tell the kid you can pretend his mom is Kenny anytime.
laxplayerbtd96 0
wth??
ange17 7
kenny always dies at each and every episode..
smexylexilovesyo 0
kennys parents are the best!
janier234 0
sweeeet!
amrik 11
good episode.
JGoD24 5
hahaha that kid is funny!!!
benderbot19 0
call his parents and nicely ask them to please bag their sons poop and dispose of it properly tell them it's the law, or you're going to call the police. you don't want other children to get worms.
Riddles66 0
Why the hell it his parents letting him watch South Park!? it's TV-MA for a reason!! Ugh FYL cuz you have some bad parenting going in the 9-year-olds house.. Don't move.. show him your smarter then a dumb TV show!
JustinThunder 8
It's not dumb... :(
Riddles66 0
I disagree....
Lisa89 3
i think your description is dumb: 'Don't **** with me or I'll get my ******* hatchet and hunt your dumb ass down!' Are you admitting that you hunt people down and hack them to death who get on the wrong side of you? Man that is uber messed up.
Riddles66 0
I don't really hunt people down. It's a little like saying. I kinda saying "Dont **** with me or I will find I way to **** you up with words" Its kinda a juggalo/juggalette thing
mosquito19 14
catch him in the act and push him into his own shit
CitrusGirl 0
You know parents are doing their job when their 9 year ok'd watches South Park. Right?
CitrusGirl 0
*old
benderbot19 0
old
SwaggerMelon 6
old
xoxoMEGANxoxo 13
lol haha