Today, I found out that boyfriend doesn't think he needs to wipe his ass after he shits if he's going straight in the shower because he can just "clean it up in there". We share a loofah. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I found out my boyfriend doesn’t think it’s important to wipe after he poops. FML
Today, I was shopping with my boyfriend, when he suggested that I might want to buy a new loofah. When I asked why, he admitted he's been using it to scrub his ass crack for weeks. I use that loofah to wash my face. FML
Today, I discovered my new boyfriend doesn’t have toilet paper. He has a toilet cloth, which he instructed me to rinse off in the toilet after I was done. FML
Today, I found out that my boyfriend pees in the shower. This would've been OK if he was peeing into the drain. Instead, he pees on the shampoo and soap bottles. FML
Today, I realized that my roommate has been using my loofah to clean our toilet. I've been cleaning myself with the shit of four college boys for the last six months. FML
Today, I discovered that my boyfriend, the one who does all the cooking in the house, doesn't wash his hands after using the bathroom. FML
Today, my boyfriend informed me that he can't remember the last time he took a shower. He then told me he doesn't see the "need" of taking showers. FML
Today, my boyfriend informed me that he hasn't showered in over a week because he "doesn't like to be wet." FML
Today, my boyfriend told me that he hasn't showered in over a week, because he "doesn't like to be wet." FML
Today, I found out why my boyfriend takes so long in the bathroom. Apparently he has a system for shitting he’s very OCD about: he has to be naked in case poo touches any of his clothes, he has to wipe stood up with one leg elevated, and the whole process takes 10x longer than it should. FFS! FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
NateHQ 13
Why the hell would you share a loofah in the first place?! Thats just plain nasty!
SKYstlimit 11
then get your own, not difficult
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (52)
nainai_09 14
Even if he did wipe... why the hell are you sharing it?? Those things are like $2.00. Not to mention it's disgusting
dabomsht123 3
Easy fix!! Buy yourself a new looofa and hide that motherfuckrr!! You don't wanna share a loofa that he has essentially taken a shit on!!
janfleury 19
Gross. Some things should never be shared.
URBeingLied2 23
TIL why some people have that weird odor that smells like perfume sprayed on poop.
Catdragon 40
Well it's better than him taking a dump IN the shower and then waffle stomping it down the drain
KaylaTackett 18
I refuse to share one with my boyfriend!
emh86 14
100% YDI. How hard is it to just buy one for yourself?
Redhairchick 10
YDI for sharing a loofah. They're like 2 bucks. WOW.
epiccrazy 15
Who in their right mind shares a loofah?! That's gross. I don't even leave mine in the shower because, I'm paranoid it might fall some how and touch the floor or even worse, the shower drain
kristinjeaneen 21
This is why I don't share my loofah with anyone. That's really unhygienic and defeats the whole purpose of a shower if you're just wiping yourself down with someone else's germs and bacteria
SneezyBear 27
1) How is it any 'cleaner' to wipe yourself down with your own bacteria? and 2) if you're having sex, you've already got their bacteria all over you anyway, which is gonna get on your loofah, which means you'll be wiping yourself down with their bacteria anyway. Logic, people. Get some.
STFU01 14
But does he shit on her when they have sex?