Today, I found out my college friends are going to attack me after Christmas and attempt to tickle me to death. All because they know that I hate to be tickled. They are also going to make a Facebook group dedicated to the matter so people can join in if they wish. FML
Collection
Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, my coworkers were bored. To solve this, they taped me to a chair and tried tickling me to death. My boss joined in. FML
Today, I found out why the group chat I was in with my friends has been dead. Apparently, they made a group chat without me in it, so that they could make fun of me behind my back. FML
Today, I went to my friend's house to celebrate her birthday but 3 of them ganged up on me and molested my arse cheeks. Later, someone found a wooden plank and spanked me hard. There was also a BB gun and my arse was the target. I have been a social outcast all my life, and these are my only friends, but I'm always hit. FML
Today, I was sitting in class when I overheard a group talking about how much they don't like me. When they saw me there, they burst out laughing. FML
Today, I found out my old high school class has a friend group on Facebook, so I applied to join but received a very frank and nasty message. Apparently they all remember me as “the Bullying Mean Girl” and all voted not to let me join. I was a nerd in high school and I was nice to everyone. FML
Today, after knowing my friendship group for 9 years, who were like my family, I found out that they actually hate me and have been trying to get me to go away for 5 years. When I left, they laughed at me, argued with me and their exact last words were, "K bye" and then kicked me out. FML
Today, the main topic for my sister and her friends in the car was how many ways they could think of to kill me. They came up with 137. I have to spend a week with these people. FML
Today, I have to deal with being laughed at by my mother and sister, because they keep making sharp movements towards me, causing me to flinch. This is because I got mugged and beaten last night. They think it's hysterical. FML
Today, I found out that my friends have been "fake laughing" whenever I make a joke just so that the situation doesn't get awkward. FML
Today, I found out that my classmates hate me so much that they have a seating arrangement where people have to sit next to me on a rotating basis. A fight broke out yesterday because someone tried to skip their turn. FML
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Top comments
Oxy_Moron 0
Imagine if your friends then decide not to show up... and then you end up being tickled by a bunch of total strangers lmao
justsayin21 0
that's hilarious. i hope the event is a success and you die.
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Comments (105)
barkman173 0
how 'bout just buy some pepper spray or a tazer (sp?)
kiwi0605 0
that sounds soooooo horrible. NOT.
silvertongue 0
If they do that to you and your make it out alive kick their asses. That's not cool. If you don't like it you can say no. Also hide from them and call the cops.
mangowow 1
So. What.
overdrive_fml 0
dude.. MLIA would be proud to have friends like that.
ashlea925 0
why say "college friends?" why not just "friends?" maybe i'm just being dumb, but that got me thinking.=D
Hacksaw 4
Just kill them ahead of time. Problem solved.
Michelle07 0
I wouldn't post that story hey hahahah I want to join that group, even though there's pretty much nil chance of me ever coming across you :P
Leashaness 5
Wow. You're in college and crying about your friends tickling you? Grow up. YDI!
melissa1983 0
Boo ******* hoo. God you are such a little bitch.