Today, I found out my college friends are going to attack me after Christmas and attempt to tickle me to death. All because they know that I hate to be tickled. They are also going to make a Facebook group dedicated to the matter so people can join in if they wish. FML
Collection
Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, my coworkers were bored. To solve this, they taped me to a chair and tried tickling me to death. My boss joined in. FML
Today, I found out why the group chat I was in with my friends has been dead. Apparently, they made a group chat without me in it, so that they could make fun of me behind my back. FML
Today, I went to my friend's house to celebrate her birthday but 3 of them ganged up on me and molested my arse cheeks. Later, someone found a wooden plank and spanked me hard. There was also a BB gun and my arse was the target. I have been a social outcast all my life, and these are my only friends, but I'm always hit. FML
Today, I was sitting in class when I overheard a group talking about how much they don't like me. When they saw me there, they burst out laughing. FML
Today, I found out my old high school class has a friend group on Facebook, so I applied to join but received a very frank and nasty message. Apparently they all remember me as “the Bullying Mean Girl” and all voted not to let me join. I was a nerd in high school and I was nice to everyone. FML
Today, after knowing my friendship group for 9 years, who were like my family, I found out that they actually hate me and have been trying to get me to go away for 5 years. When I left, they laughed at me, argued with me and their exact last words were, "K bye" and then kicked me out. FML
Today, the main topic for my sister and her friends in the car was how many ways they could think of to kill me. They came up with 137. I have to spend a week with these people. FML
Today, I have to deal with being laughed at by my mother and sister, because they keep making sharp movements towards me, causing me to flinch. This is because I got mugged and beaten last night. They think it's hysterical. FML
Today, I found out that my friends have been "fake laughing" whenever I make a joke just so that the situation doesn't get awkward. FML
Today, I found out that my classmates hate me so much that they have a seating arrangement where people have to sit next to me on a rotating basis. A fight broke out yesterday because someone tried to skip their turn. FML
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Top comments
Oxy_Moron 0
Imagine if your friends then decide not to show up... and then you end up being tickled by a bunch of total strangers lmao
justsayin21 0
that's hilarious. i hope the event is a success and you die.
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Comments (105)
Poetic_catfish 0
ydi for ruining their joke
Lia_Mackenzie 4
It's a woman. Learn to read, plzkthx.
Lia_Mackenzie 4
Also, I'm pretty sure it's illegal for a dad to tase his kid. Isn't that - oh, I dunno - child abuse? Tasers ******* hurt! That's why you have to be trained, and you must be tased before you can have a license to carry one, or use it.
silvertongue 0
people really do that? I thought that was just in stories.
la_reina7 0
this isnt an fml. wak !
GriefBacon 0
Sooooo?
GrapefruitZoe 0
You guys are all cruel and mean and clearly not ticklish. Some people are EXTREMELY sensitive to tickling, to the point that it's almost painful, which I'm guessing is the OP's condition. If my friends did all that to me, I would not consider them my friends anymore. It's not funny to make a facebook group so strangers can tickle your ticklish friend; it's sadistic and hateful. She's not an attention *****; she's hurt that her friends are so cold-hearted. Honey, join the group, and say this: "If you go through with this, I will find new friends. It's not funny. I hate tickling, and people who actually cared about me would not ask strangers to tickle me just for laughs. If you don't know when to stop with jokes, you're not worth my time."
Lia_Mackenzie 4
On the contrary - I'm very ticklish. I just don't freak out when people tickle me. And depending on who does it, I respond or don't. If I don't, they stop. If I do, they keep going. It's pretty simple.
Lia_Mackenzie 4
I am. I just have a ton of muscle control and willpower.
Icy_fml 0
just tell them you have diarrhea right before they're about to tickle you. works 90% of the time for me.
AndreaHatesYou1 0
Hahahaha, that's awesome. Your friends are definitely cooler than you.
AndreaHatesYou1 0
Hahahahahahahahahaha, 54, you're an overly sensitive dumbshit. :D
justsayin21 0
2nd. lol
GrapefruitZoe 0
Dude, I had a friend who would shriek if you touched her. She was SO sensitive to tickling. And it is SO unpleasant to be tickled. It's one thing as foreplay, or messing around, as long as you KNOW BOUNDARIES. It is not okay to hurt someone without cause. It is NEVER okay to hurt someone for your own amusement. Sure, I'm a hippie. But I think being nice is better than making a joke at the expense of someone else.