Today, I finally got intimate with my girlfriend, the girl of my dreams. I undressed and, ready to step in bed with her, I see her staring at 'it'. Which was quickly followed by laughter. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I took my clothes off in front of my girlfriend for the first time. She made a weird face for a moment, then burst into laughter. She couldn't stop laughing, no matter how hard she tried. FML
Today, it was mine and my girlfriend's two-year anniversary. Back in my room, I decided to get sexy for her by opening the bathroom door, dropping my bath towel, and slowly approaching the bed in the buff. I tripped over my feet and fell flat on my face twice while doing so, which she hysterically laughed at. FML
Today, I finally got intimate with the girl I like. As I started lifting her shirt, she stuck her hand down my pants and grabbed my junk. She immediately stopped what she was doing, snickered, and calmly said, "Take me home." FML
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend when she starts laughing and says, "Wow, this is just too funny." FML
Today, it was the first time I was about to have sex with my girlfriend of 3 years, since I'm self-conscious about my size. When she saw it, she started laughing. She was mad I didn't want to continue. FML
Today, I met my girlfriend's parents for the first time. I was on their bed having sex with their daughter. FML
Today, as my girlfriend and I were making out, I slowly took my clothes off and revealed my body to her for the first time. She looked, smiled, and said reassuringly, "Aww, don't worry. I know how it's supposed to look." FML
Today, I got home from work and found my girlfriend waiting for me in some skimpy lingerie. She ended up pushing me onto the bed, and as I lay there, expecting to be pleasured, she pulled out a pair of adult-sized footsie pajamas and dressed me in them. FML
Today, after getting a pat of appreciation from my girlfriend's father for taking it slow, he found me later, in her room, with my head between her thighs. FML
Today, my girlfriend text me and told me to do something sexy because she was going to FaceTime me. I eagerly dropped my pants and started stroking it to get ready for her. As soon as I opened her call, she was standing with my wife. I literally got caught with my dick in my hand. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
jonnymohio 2
Turnabout is fair play. Point at her boobs and laugh.
Shady06 0
lolz that sucks xD all you gotta tell her is..."baby it's not about the size of the boat but the motion in the ocean" :D than stick it in her mouth lolz
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (81)
Camo_Love 0
That's so ******* harsh, i would just point and laugh at her **** or something. I'm pretty sure I am about average length and i'm proud to be. i wouldn't care if it was smaller either doesn't really matter most of the important nerve endings are only 1 inch inside the ******, so you dont really need anything big to pleasure her.
LaughingAtJuu 0
Unless she one of those girls that get no pleasure from vaginal stimulation... maybe all that works for her is clitoral stimuli... Not making any escuses for her being stupid with the fellow. Small penis or not, is she even good in bed? Odds are is she's so used to being the person being pleasured she doesn't know how to please a man. In which case id say that broad sucks at sex...
omghehehe 0
i did something similar, in a professional setting. no laughing but i said, "Is that it?" when i looked at it :D i didnt realize what i said because i was in gross in learning a new skill. But he said, "I've gotten better responses than that before" ........blushhhhh :D :D :D oops!!!!
hofmann911 0
the best form of birth control :D
LoosechangeXxXx 0
YDI for being tiny and it really is your junior in this case.
cutiepie11 0
awww that really sucks
livelifetotheful_fml 0
BABY PENIS!!!!!!!
jondivey 9
win
MattPDX 2
only if it fits...
Taylorswift137 0
man, does this turn me on. even thou I'm a virgain, but vibarters are nice!!:))
davizv 0
yup he totally chose his "rod" size. idiots