Today, I finally got intimate with my girlfriend, the girl of my dreams. I undressed and, ready to step in bed with her, I see her staring at 'it'. Which was quickly followed by laughter. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I took my clothes off in front of my girlfriend for the first time. She made a weird face for a moment, then burst into laughter. She couldn't stop laughing, no matter how hard she tried. FML
Today, it was mine and my girlfriend's two-year anniversary. Back in my room, I decided to get sexy for her by opening the bathroom door, dropping my bath towel, and slowly approaching the bed in the buff. I tripped over my feet and fell flat on my face twice while doing so, which she hysterically laughed at. FML
Today, I finally got intimate with the girl I like. As I started lifting her shirt, she stuck her hand down my pants and grabbed my junk. She immediately stopped what she was doing, snickered, and calmly said, "Take me home." FML
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend when she starts laughing and says, "Wow, this is just too funny." FML
Today, it was the first time I was about to have sex with my girlfriend of 3 years, since I'm self-conscious about my size. When she saw it, she started laughing. She was mad I didn't want to continue. FML
Today, I met my girlfriend's parents for the first time. I was on their bed having sex with their daughter. FML
Today, as my girlfriend and I were making out, I slowly took my clothes off and revealed my body to her for the first time. She looked, smiled, and said reassuringly, "Aww, don't worry. I know how it's supposed to look." FML
Today, I got home from work and found my girlfriend waiting for me in some skimpy lingerie. She ended up pushing me onto the bed, and as I lay there, expecting to be pleasured, she pulled out a pair of adult-sized footsie pajamas and dressed me in them. FML
Today, after getting a pat of appreciation from my girlfriend's father for taking it slow, he found me later, in her room, with my head between her thighs. FML
Today, my girlfriend text me and told me to do something sexy because she was going to FaceTime me. I eagerly dropped my pants and started stroking it to get ready for her. As soon as I opened her call, she was standing with my wife. I literally got caught with my dick in my hand. FML
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Top comments
jonnymohio 2
Turnabout is fair play. Point at her boobs and laugh.
Shady06 0
lolz that sucks xD all you gotta tell her is..."baby it's not about the size of the boat but the motion in the ocean" :D than stick it in her mouth lolz
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Comments (81)
AKBIGCAL 0
She wouldn't laugh if he was big, she would have a horified look on her face and be thinkin "oh shit, this is gunna hurt"...
LaughingAtJuu 0
no crap dude, sometimes the fat hides the chubster. And the girl gets all egotistical about the situation untill your about 8 + inches deep. Then whos laughing? (yea you only saw 2, but you didnt see the 6inch's hidden lolz) but yea, OP what is wrong with your schlong? on average a guy is only 2-4 inches non erect, and erect its somewhere between 5-7 inches. on average, some guys are endowed with bigger members others not so much. Learn to please... :)
couny343 1
Harsh. How does he deserve it ?
jonny2x4 0
Not a problem. Just stick it in her ass "by accident" and continue to plug away till she begs you to stop. He who laughs last laughs best.
alilmonster 1
WTF?
Avenging_Angel 0
Either she's never seen one before, or it's really small.
Superawesomestev 0
that will teach you to forget her paper bag.
ilikeu12 0
damn!!!!!
tmanapoo 0
Who cares as long as you still got some.
Villa3L 0
Well At Least She Was Honest To Her Feelings ?. Now Maybe You Can Get Some Help To Increase =]
LeoV_fml 0
Just like i always say "ha ur penis isnt big ITS SMALL AND NOT BIG!!!"
ohhhhman 0
Well...it seems like if you are referring to your penis as "it", then you probably aren't ready yet. Maybe she noticed you haven't hit puberty yet?