Today, I felt fairly depressed about being single for the holidays during work. This cute girl came to my register asking about our sales ad. After telling her we had no copies, she asked for my number. I shouted: "Finally, someone wants to go out with me." She wanted the store's number to call. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, while I was shopping at a store with my friend, I noticed a cute girl smiling at us. My friend said, "She's all yours," and walked away. When I approached her, she asked me if my friend was single. FML
Today, while working as a cashier, I was flirting with this cute girl. When I asked her if she had her store card she said, "No", paused, then said "Can I give you my number?" I said, "Sure, that would be awesome, do you want mine?" She said no. I didn't know I could just enter the card number. FML
Today, after weeks of eating in the same restaurant, I finally worked up the nerve to ask the super-cute cashier for her phone number. "Aw, how cute. Do you have an older brother?" FML
Today, a very pretty girl came up to me and asked me for my phone number. Very pleased, I give it to her with a huge smile and tell her that I can be reached at any time. I then watch her go back to her group of friends. My number was for her gay friend, who then meekly waved at me. FML
Today, I saw a cute girl working register at my regular coffee shop and politely asked the her for her number. I was brutally rejected. A few minutes later, a douchebag with a popped collar approached her with a cheesy pickup line and left with not only her number, but a free frappe. FML
Today, my friend and I went to a bar for drinks. I noticed this cute girl and went over to say "Hi." I had a great conversation with her and I asked for her number before she left. She passed it to me on a piece of paper with instructions specifying for my friend to call her and not me. FML
Today, I was approached by the head cheerleader, and she asked for my number. I was so excited that I gave it to her without question. Then she smiled, and walked away. Too bad my girlfriend was right behind me when it happened. FML
Today, I flirted with the cashier at the local bagel joint. I complimented her unique blue hair and got her number. Later on that evening, she served my girlfriend and me our food at a different restaurant. FML
Today, the really cute guy who asked for my number last night texted me. He wanted to know if he could get my friend's number, because he'd been too shy to ask her directly. FML
Today, I went shopping. At the counter, the cashier started flirting with me and asked me for my number. He was cute, so I gave it to him. After walking out of the store, I got a text that said, "I didn't want to say it out loud, but your pants are unzipped." FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Heroesrule99 0
Why the hell would you shout that out? Loser
teiso_fml 0
Even if she DID want your personal number to go out with you, yelling that out isn't the classiest move to make... and probably would have freaked her out a little.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (107)
Williii_fml 0
Ehm, any mods nowadays? These types of FML are so common and not funny anymore
richnow 0
its been 18 years since youve had a boyfriend?????
FerrariCake 2
Hey, some people have NEVER had a boyfriend... like me. And I don't ever want one. It's not that unusual.
jelmermcgee 8
I remember when I had never had a girlfriend yet. I convinced myself that dating was stupid and I didn't need it. Then I got laid and realized that not being able to get a girlfriend does not make dating stupid. To the posters who have said something like "I haven't had a boy/girlfriend for 18 years;" we all know you are only 18 and have never had a date. @36 good work with the list of logical fallacies. Did you know that your ability to list these out is the same reason why your 19 and have always been single? Now all this talk about dating and ******* makes me think of Neil Patrick Harris: "I'm going to a ***** house, and I'm gonna get my **** on."
mpc_fml 0
30 ftw. Just imagine, "Can I have your number?" Response, "Finally!" I know I'd run whether I intended to ask the person out or not.
nonynony 0
Yeah, here's a tip: even if she actually HAD been asking for your number, shouting it to the entire store is a surefire way to make her change her mind, FAST. First, she'd be humiliated, and second, that kind of desperation is NOT attractive.
anonacs 0
Even if she did want your personal number, after yelling that she would have lied anyway
Jackie_xD 0
:O woooooooooooooooow. bahahhahahaha. xD niiiiice xP
michelleyily 0
Ew. Why would you shout that? If i was really asking for your number id quickly change my mind and say i was askin for the store's number too. YDI
kremit 1
next time remember that no one wants to go one with you and you'll probably die alone
jessxoxo28 5
Aw :( u'll find some1 soon
f_alltheirlives 3
Aw :( You needed to save some time spelling "You" and "Someone", hope you spent the extra time writing a horrible spelled suicide letter!! something like: "I can't take it anymore, hope u guys understand the reasons 4 y I'm doin this.... Say bye to my m8 "The English language" and tell it I'm sorry I raped it with my fingers... It's all to l8 to take back tho... XOXO JESS THE GURL WHO CANT TAKE FIVE, SORRY:5!! MICROSECONDS OUT OF HER LIFE TO NOT COME OF AS AN IMATURE 10 YEAR OLD.." Now where are MY chillpills..
dimension516 0
Calm down.
kevind23 0
**** you.