Today, I fell in the shower, landing ass-crack first onto a can of shaving cream, which split my butt straight down the crack. FML
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70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, while showering, I finished off the shampoo bottle. I decided to see if I could shoot it into the trash can over the shower curtain. When I heard the successful "thunk", I got so excited I slipped and cracked my head open. FML
Today, my husband ran a nice warm bubble bath with extra bubbles. I undressed and slid down into the tub only to have the most ungodly pain go up my backside. Turns out he knocked his razor into the water when he added the bubbles. I now have two butt cracks. FML
Today, I tried to take a slow-motion video of myself flipping my hair like in a shampoo commercial. Instead, I hit my head against the shower door so hard that my shelf of cosmetics collapsed and landed in my toilet. FML
Today, I was taking a shower, facing away from the faucet, when I dropped the soap. When I bent over to pick up the soap, my sister flushed a toilet in the next room, causing hot water to scorch my anus. I got made my shower's bitch, FML
Today, while showering I slipped and fell, taking down the shower curtain and smashing my head against the floor, resulting in a concussion. My family came running because of the noise and I lay naked, bleeding and concussed for few minutes before they could stop laughing enough to get me help. FML
Today, I realized how fat I really am. While going to the bathroom I leaned to the side to wipe my butt and heard a crack. Not knowing what it was, I continued to wipe. After I finished, I got up to see that I'd cracked the toilet seat in half. FML
Today, I decided to conquer my fear of blades, and tried shaving my legs with a razor. I sat on the side of my bathtub and wet my legs, but some of the water splashed. I slipped on it and fell back, hitting my head on the tile wall and slicing my leg open at the same time. FML
Today, as I showered, I sneezed, hit my face on the wall, got shampoo in my eyes, slipped on a bar of soap, bashed my head on the wall as I fell, grabbed at the walls to stop me from falling and happened to turn off the cold water, scorching me. FML
Today, I was in a public restroom and slipped on some soap on the floor while I was washing my hands. As I fell, I grabbed the nearest thing to break my fall, which happened to be the hand dryer. It fell off the wall and hit me in the face. FML
Today, I was taking a shower for the first time in my new apartment. The shower head broke off the wall and slammed onto my head, while spraying water everywhere. I tried to stop the water, but only stopped the cold and got burnt by the hot. FML
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Top comments
Higamalia 19
I reeeeally hope you landed on it sideways and not when it was standing straight up. That could have ended much, much worse...talk about a close shave :p
Waschlappen 23
So it is actually possible to just fall onto random objects with your anus. I need to give all the people going to the ER with stuff up their rectum the benefit of a doubt now..
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Comments (62)
RA91 26
Clicked YDI by mistake! That sounds painful!
manuwish 9
you spared us all the gory details..did it bleed? how big is the wound? does it go over your anus? did the shaving cream can split open from your weight when you fell on it(assuming that is the right verb and we are talking about an external wound)?
False_Stupidity 42
My question is why the hell there is a can of shaving cream on the floor of your shower?
freddygasman 18
did you go to the doctor and tell him that you broke your butt and show him the big crack in it?
ClitasaurusRex 3
At least it didn't go UP your ass.
smartjingle 11
Nice try Erin, we see lots of people with foreign objects up their butts in the ER who tell us similar stories but we *know* why you/they have an object in the ass.
momac86 17
Made an ass out of yourself now you'll be the butt of everyone's jokes
renrioku 15
Dont let the shaving cream hit you where the good lord split you... oh wait...
succafucus 2
That's what they all say when the Dr. asks how exactly that happened...
Harley Osborne 8
I just clenched in sympathy.