Today, I discovered that the neck injury that my mom has had since last week was planned just as an excuse not to shovel when today's snowstorm came. She has planned on being lazy for over a week now. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my mom and I had to shovel our driveway after an epic snowstorm that left us with 22 inches of snow. We only needed to dig out my mom's car and not mine. After we did all that work and shoveled all the snow onto the side where my car was we found out my mom had a flat tire. FML
Today, as I always do when we get a lot of snow, I shovelled the snow off my elderly neighbor’s driveway. I slipped and fell into a snowbank, breaking my collarbone, and she had to call 911 to help me out because I couldn't snow angel my way up. FML
Today, my dad and I were shovelling snow off the roof. I told him I was going to jump off the roof. He told me to go ahead, so I did. He failed to tell me that the snow was packed and wouldn't break my fall. I now have an injured back. He didn't tell me because he didn't think I would actually do it. FML
Today, my mom made me shovel our long driveway, as it had just snowed a couple of inches. It took me two and half hours to finish. She came out and said, "Wow, is this really the best you can do?" FML
Today, I walked across my kitchen to go get my mom a blanket after she shoveled snow. I slipped and caught the kitchen chair with my side, landed on the floor and almost fracturing my knee cap. She then told me she wasn't cold. FML
Today, my mom showed up to the surprise party my sister planned for me on crutches. Car accident? Bad fall? Dog attack? Nope! She's fine, just a malignant narcissist who needed all the attention to be on her. She managed to “fall” several times suspiciously when we were posing for photos. FML
Today, my mom and I were running late for school, and she got pretty stuck in the snow so she asked me to dig her out. Then she ran over my foot. As I got into the car and blamed her for what she'd done, she shouted at me that she couldn't care less, and that we had to hurry. FML
Today, my parents left early in the morning to run some errands, and I thought it would be nice to shovel our rather large driveway for them while they were out. An hour later, they returned from the store with a snow blower. FML
Today, our dog became ill. My mom wasted no time attending her every needs and became very distressed. When I had appendicitis a few months ago, my mom told me to “sleep it off” and a friend had to take me to the hospital. She only called once to bitch at me for “doing this on purpose to make her feel bad.” FML
Today, my mother-in-law scheduled her neck surgery for the same day our baby is being born. She also fully expects my husband to drive her to the hospital and stay for her recovery. Uh, yeah no. FML
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Top comments
Nightwing98 22
Damn, that's a lot of planning just to be lazy. I'm pretty sure it's counter-productive.
perdix 31
Your mom is very industrious -- she had to combine the skills of a meteorologist, an orthopedist and an actress to pull off this trick. And what the **** kind of son are you? Why aren't you shoveling Momma's snow? She pushed your big, bulbous head through her ****** -- you owe her big time!
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Comments (85)
RissaLea 8
Your mom is just simply awesome in my opinion. I'm sure she has shoveled snow many times, what is a break for her gonna hurt? Besides I would be ecstatic to have all the snow, we go through all the four seasons in one day here in missouri!
DocBastard 40
So the fact that she has shoveled before makes it ok for her to fake an injury to get out of it this time? That makes her a lazy asshole and you an idiot for thinking she's awesome. In my opinion.
RissaLea 8
Okay, I can have my own damn opinion as you can yours. So what she faked it, I wonder how many times the kid has faked being hurt or sick to get out of something. There is no difference. All kids do it so a mother can do it every once In a while too.
ManInTheMachine 20
So you're saying she's justified because her kid has "probably" done it before? Two wrongs make a right in your world? Oh wait, I'm sorry, it's your opinion. Please, carry on with your stupid reasoning.
ironichalibut 24
36- You are entitled to have your own opinion, but there are certainly ways to do things properly. As the mother she shouldn't have faked it, if she did need a break she could've asked for one maturely. Children lie and fake because they haven't learned any better yet. The task of teaching and setting a proper example falls on adults or parents.
RissaLea 8
Wow people on here sure do get all your panties in a bundle. So what it's their problems, not ours.
RissaLea 8
Yes I do agree with you, but it's still funny me to me. I never said that she couldn't do it another way but she didn't. Love how I'm the one being bashed on when there are plenty more people on here that thought the mom had a win too.
ManInTheMachine 20
Just because it isn't our problem doesn't make it right or justifiable, especially with that logic. And no, you're not the only one getting "bashed". Do you see any of the other similar comments being upvoted? No. Perdix is the only one who is, and 95% of the time he's being sarcastic, which you obviously werent. Also, people on here have a low tolerance for idiocy, if you could call that getting "your panties in a bundle".
RissaLea 8
Okay. Done with with the senselessness, you and I both know it's a waste of time. Your going to think what you want and as will I. Have a good day.
ManInTheMachine 20
Likewise.
DocBastard 40
You're* lololol No but seriously, trying to justify stupid behaviour in adults by claiming "children do it too!" is one of the stupidest arguments I've ever heard here.
Pleonasm 36
If the children were allowed to justify anything they could do by saying "adults do it too!" think of all the awful shit they would get away with. We're much worse than kids, so now point trying to compare us to them, but instaed act as good role models lest we be responsable for them picking up our bad behaviour.
RissaLea 8
What I meant by that is the kid is probably old enough to know right from wrong just as his mother is. I seriously doubt this kid is really young considering it was posted on here. There was no harm meant by me thinking it was funny. So what the kid had to help out his mom whether she was really hurt or not. She shouldn't have to fake it to get help.
SuperPizzaMan_fml 11
Just be a good son, and offer her some help regardless of injuries. Maybe if you helped out more often she wouldn't have a reason to lie.
eliotar 6
I think this may be a win on the Mom's part.
acerima 11
The fact she had to do that means you're just as lazy. Your mom shouldn't have to worry about shoveling snow!
akiahara 14
Isn't that what kids are for? Unskilled labor?
speshlk37 13
Lazy mom ftw!
loserman67 36
Momma -1 You - 0 Your momma's not lazy, she's a genius! Besides, she's your momma, get your Big-Mac filled fat ass out there and shovel the snow for her!
starw0lf 31
While the OP's Mother may have been dishonest about her condition, maybe OP or another family member can help her out. Maybe the OP has another job to do?
picante72 24
Theme park with roller coasters, go karting, horseback riding, sledding, offroading, yoga, volleyball. Most moms would do those with their kids. Don't allow her to join.
KayleeT 9
She didn't have to make up some story just to get out of it. What's wrong with simply asking someone to do else to do it as a favor? I don't really see the need for some intricate plot to be lazy.