Today, I decided to check out a dating site, when I stumbled across my ex wife's profile. She'd had it for four out of the five years of our marriage. And no, it didn't rate us as a good match. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, I signed up for an online dating service, a couple of days after my divorce. I got my first batch of matches, and number one was a smiling picture of the woman who had just divorced my ass after 20+ years together. Her profile shows she has to have been active there for months. FML
Today, I was looking at dating profiles with my single friend, trying to find a guy for her, and we found my husband's profile. FML
Today, I removed all my online dating profiles. Apparently my ex-husband finds stalking me online preferable to spending time with his new girlfriend. FML
What are the odds?
Today, I re-joined a popular on-line dating service. I'd first signed up 3 years ago and was matched with a wonderful woman. After about a year, she broke up with me. I was devastated. After two years of trying to win her back, I'd decided it's best just to move on. Guess who they matched me with? FML
Not going back
Today, I found my ex on Bumble for the second time. She lives with her husband, whom she married a decade ago. FML
Why do people do this?
Today, a friend showed me my husband's online dating profile, which includes photos of him with our kids. FML
Today, my ex messaged me out of the blue saying she found my fiancée's Tinder profile. I told her there was no way it was true. It actually was. FML
Today, after being married for 20 years, I found out that my wife has accounts on multiple dating sites, "just in case." FML
Today, I checked my facebook, and my wife of 5 years was listed as single. I then write on her wall that it is ok to announce to be married. She writes back saying that we have to talk and to come to the kitchen. My wife divorced me over facebook. FML
Today, I found out that my wife had been debating leaving me for an old boyfriend from high school. They rekindled their relationship on Facebook, and talking on the cell phone. Both things I insisted she have. FML
Top comments
cellycrunk 16
That's terrible. Maybe you can show that to the divorce lawyer and get some good money.
Im2Shy 16
I disagree. Some people that use dating sites are busy working and don't go out to too many places where single people frequent.
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Comments (75)
homesuckfucker 28
Good! You know now that you aren't a good match for an unfaithful woman, and you have the opportunity to start anew. (I've also heard that living on your own isn't extremely terrible.)
foxwasalamb 24
nobody to eat your damn food, take the damn covers, use your good shampoo, etc.
laden_swallow09 35
Nobody to leave messes. Nobody who brings home crap you have nowhere to put. No one to move stuff around and make you spend a half hour looking for it… Yeah, single life ain't so bad!
devildog562 33
That sucks , your wife is not a very good match, and hopefully you find someone better
creativityisnt 19
You deserve better, OP! Screw her. Now go find someone on that dating site that you ARE compatible with!
patrickeli 15
Well, the site clearly condones the divorce. You were probably too good for her anyway.
Amama_fml 30
"Condones" means "condoms" in spanish and I read it as condoms and was like "what the hell does that have to do with ANYTHING?!" Hehe sorry, just wanted to share that with you.
marcranger 29
I don't know if that's better or worse than having your worthless loser of an ex come up as your top-rated match in a 500-mile radius. At least you can take comfort that you aren't that compatible with someone who is clearly disagreeable and that she's not your problem anymore.
empbob 20
My ex-wife of 12 years came up as a top rated match on OkCupid, I immediately blocked her before she could find out.
LiveLifeAllDay 11
I think you just need to get out there and prove to her that your the one who benefited from the divorce
MyDadLeftMeInKFC 21
At least you dodged a bullet, even if it took a little while! (:
NightHawk387 22
Since they were married for 5 years, I wouldn't say he dodged a bullet. More like a minor flesh wound.
PSYqualiac 17
You got 99 problems, but she ain't one.
davisjenny81 30
Boohoo. I don't know what you guys read, but this is what,I read, "Today, I learned my ex wife and I are not a good match. FML."
PleasantDino 22
His ex wife had a dating site profile for 4 years of their 5 year marriage. I think that is FML worthy
worldclassrager 41
Maybe you should have checked that earlier... You'll find your perfect match soon