Today, I am on vacation in the Smoky Mountains with my parents. They just decided to take me to the place I was conceived seventeen years ago: a bench at a public park. FML
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Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, my parents told me I was conceived at Disney World. Monday, I take a class trip to Disney World. My friends will be having fun and all I'll be able to think about is my parents having sex. FML
Today, my family and I went on a picnic in the park 45 minutes drive away from our house. I fell asleep beneath a tree. They left me there. FML
Today, my parents invited all their kids and grandkids to join them on a vacation trip to the mountains; all their kids except me, that is. I'm not invited. But they did invite my ex-husband. And his new girlfriend. FML
Today, I found out that I was conceived during a conjugal visit. FML
Today, after I spent a fortune on plane tickets and hiked a mountain so I could spread dad's ashes around the boulder where he proposed to mom, and where mom's ashes were scattered 3 years ago, the moment was ruined by the fat, stoned teenagers having sex on the boulder here in the middle of nowhere. FML
Today, I went to the park and sat down on a bench to enjoy my coffee. I heard a few young girls behind me talking about how their first experience of sex was. I turned around to see how old these girls really were. One of them was my daughter. FML
Today, I learned that I was conceived on a public bus. FML
Today, my mother knocked on the door of my room at 7am. I am currently over 300 miles from home, on a vacation to get away from my overbearing family. I told none of them where I was going. FML
Today, while on vacation, I realized my parents and grandparents had been running off and doing quite a few errands lately. After doing some sleuthing, I discovered they were taking turns having blood-curdling sex in our other hotel room down the hall. FML
Today, I went to visit my parents after 4 years of not seeing them. They'd moved without telling me. FML
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Top comments
melikesfml 11
Mmm wonderful family memories.
Queen_Cosmos 7
Think about it like this, if they never did it on the bench you wouldn't be here today :)
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Comments (145)
daboss81 0
you should steal the bench, and damn park needs to be updated
micahsmommy 13
So you now know where babies come from, park benches.
XxAnnie23xX 15
That's......special.
florido_fml 10
Must of been a smokey event
mintcar 10
Have*
Eila1996 5
39- just not
andy30ace 3
Take it With you... Funny story to tell
SqueakyChipmunk 22
FLIP IT. FLIP THE TABLE. DO IT. (o_o)
gonad_gobbler 1
This explains so much, a few months ago I sat on a park bench naked...I'm due in 6 weeks.
Il_Maestro 6
Good luck raising a child with a father like that. The last time I dated a bench, she was lazy as ****.
KatieKupcake4195 9
How cute. I'm lucky I don't know my biological parents because I won't ever know where I was conceived ;) But wait.. That means I could have been conceived anywhere. *takes out cleaning supplies and begins scrubbing the chair I'm on*
Arrawyn 12
So heartfelt and special
new_Combray 4
Back to the starting point it seems...
Miouya 0
Guess you parents like to be out in the open :P