Today, for the third time this week, a telemarketer called me. Seriously annoyed, I told him in German that I don't speak English, in an attempt to get rid of him. He then started delivering his product pitch in German. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I picked up on a telemarketer and started speaking in Portuguese. It turns out that this particular telemarketer spoke it as well. Every time I hung up, he called back. Telemarketers get really excited when they find out someone else speaks their language. FML
Today, I returned to Germany for a break from my studies abroad. I got lost while out for groceries, so I tried asking a guy for directions. I went totally blank and strained to think of the right words, prompting him to mutter about rude foreigners not bothering to learn the local language. FML
Today, I was so desperately lonely that I begged a telemarketer not to hang up on me. FML
Today, I got a phone call, and the person on the other line started speaking French. I assumed it was my friend, since we usually speak French with each other, so I said in French, "What do you want, asshole?" It wasn't my friend. It was a representative for the exchange program I'm applying for. FML
Today, I was unable to communicate with a customer who only spoke French. As a result, my boss called me a "monolingual idiot." I speak Spanish, German, and Japanese. FML
Today, a customer asked me if I was English, because I was struggling to understand what he was saying. I said yes. He then called me a liar, and said I must be "one of them Polish immigrants." Oh, and he also had a thick Scottish accent. FML
Today, while working at my call center, I took a phone call. The guy on the other line just yelled "FUCK YOU!" twice at the top of his lungs before hanging up on me. But of course, the phone agent is always at fault. FML
Today, a telemarketer called and asked if they could speak to my "Mommy or Daddy." I'm 25 years old. FML
Today, my boss rang me for the 5th time on my day off. Frustrated I pushed 'ignore' and yelled a string of obscenities at my phone. Turns out I pushed 'talk'. FML
Today, a telemarketer called my house phone and asked for my grandpa. We were in the middle of having his wake. FML
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Top comments
OhDearBetrayal 25
See that's why it helps to know an indigenous language.
tacojauns 45
Why didn't you just hang up instantly like a normal person?
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Comments (79)
obnint 3
M
Mynameislinh 24
I usually just say, "Sorry, wrong number.." and then hang up.
Kiyaralovestolol 14
Try Pig Latin next time
Curtar2 18
just do the mature thing and hang up.
ilovegirlsinbed 8
Just ask what color under wear they have on
4ml 8
My favorite trick is to ask them to hold the line for a minute and come back ten minutes later. They have usually hung up by then....
kitsune3 20
The solution is simple. Next time, just say, "take me off your call list." They're obligated to stop calling you if you tell them to remove your name and number from their records.
Nhk_fml 4
Haha that's a good one a telemarketer will listen to you
chrissy2 28
Sometimes when telemarketers call me I pick up the phone, cry about how my life is going no where and wish I just had someone to talk to. They don't call me too much anymore.
Scattertom 12
That's when you say in another language that you don't speak German either.
TheLonelyNobody 3
ive done the same thing lol i tryed 3 diffrent languages, he knew all 3