Love: Today, I was so desperately lonely that I begged a telemarketer...

By lonely loser - 22/08/2014 18:04 - United States - Seattle

Today, I was so desperately lonely that I begged a telemarketer not to hang up on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 754

You deserved it 6 786

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Same thing different taste

By lonelynessinCA - 14/03/2011 18:31 - United States

Today, I was so lonely that I pretended I wanted to buy something from a telemarketer so that they would keep talking to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 019

You deserved it 9 785

Forever alone man

By Boyufd - 02/01/2021 08:00

Today, I feel so lonely I talked to the likely scam number that called me. Even then they hung up after 2 minutes of talking to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 785

You deserved it 177

By oxbonxo - 07/02/2011 08:38 - Australia

Today, after hanging up the phone, I realised that telemarketers are my only form of social life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 593

You deserved it 6 162

By forever alone - 05/05/2019 04:00

Today, I was so desperate for someone to talk to I called various restaurants pretending to be interested in ordering food, just so I could have a conversation. I called eleven different places. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 007

You deserved it 845

By LonelyAF - 12/08/2017 13:00

Today, I was so lonely I called my stalker ex-boyfriend. He was too busy to talk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 408

You deserved it 4 348

By newkid - 13/09/2016 19:06

Today, I was so lonely, I dragged out a conversation with a lady who called to get me to make an appointment to give blood. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 892

You deserved it 1 342

Help! I need somebody! Anybody!

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I called up Verizon Wireless to "complain" about my phone service. I really had nothing to complain about, I was just that lonely that I wanted someone to talk to. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 272

You deserved it 31 335

By skmusic - 09/04/2009 05:04 - Canada

Today, the phone rang so I went to answer it. No one was there. A minute later the phone rang again and no one answered so I assumed it was a telemarketer or a prank so I started swearing uncontrollably in rage. Turns out it was my crush calling to ask me out, but she was too nervous to ask. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 296

You deserved it 75 131

By Anonymous - 15/03/2012 20:08 - Canada

Today, a telemarketer called me and asked if they could speak to my "mommy or daddy". I am 25 years old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 421

You deserved it 2 794

Talk to me

By Anonymous - 16/04/2024 10:00 - United States - Bowling Green

Today, I called the suicide hotline, only to get lectured by a very condescending man. I hung up and called back, only for the other line to pick up and hang up on me immediately. FML

I agree, your life sucks 500

You deserved it 98

mangasempai 11

Saturday 23 August 2014 5:23

Should call Jake from Statefarm, he'll keep you company.

junkman6 22

Saturday 23 August 2014 5:23

In other news an average joe starts a company based on making phone calls to lonely people and becomes a millionaire!

Comments

mangasempai 11

Saturday 23 August 2014 5:23

Should call Jake from Statefarm, he'll keep you company.

Harshdfml 14

Saturday 23 August 2014 5:33

Say something I'm hanging up on you.

orbit 22

Saturday 23 August 2014 7:24

"She sounds hideous"

Sudoc 29

Saturday 23 August 2014 5:23

They're not allowed to hang up on you

junkman6 22

Saturday 23 August 2014 5:23

In other news an average joe starts a company based on making phone calls to lonely people and becomes a millionaire!

LexiDaBae 17

Saturday 23 August 2014 17:07

That's actually a really good idea.

bodica 4

Saturday 23 August 2014 21:30

Wasn't this a movie?

fsomelife 26

Saturday 23 August 2014 5:26

Are you perchance from soviet Russia?

jakeroney98 14

Saturday 23 August 2014 5:26

Most of those companies don't let employees hang up, so you can waste all their time you want. Kind of ironic if you ask me, but funny the same

Mauskau 35

Saturday 23 August 2014 13:40

They always hang up on me. I always question them to the point they can't respond without telling me what they're not allowed to tell me.

sashakotlik 14

Saturday 23 August 2014 5:29

Normally it's the other way around isn't it?

Psycho_Babydoll 26

Saturday 23 August 2014 5:30

Oh my God, this hurt my heart a little.

OhWhoCares 42

Saturday 23 August 2014 5:31

I'm trying to imagine how that conversation would go. If you feign interest won't they usually go on and on about whatever they're selling?

HJKM_fml 19

Saturday 23 August 2014 23:33

Yeah. I can't hang up on them fast enough. lol. *Sorry to any telemarketers out there

n3ophyt3 10

Saturday 23 August 2014 5:32

Well at least you knew whom to call when you are lonely

keirookami 11

Saturday 23 August 2014 5:34

But they ring us...

tfriend3 15

Saturday 23 August 2014 5:34

It's not that difficult to socialize, just go out and try to meet new people.

Psycho_Babydoll 26

Saturday 23 August 2014 5:38

If OP suffers from anxiety (just a wild guess, given the loneliness), it actually IS that difficult to 'just go out and meet new people'.

Rababco 29

Friday 5 August 2016 3:34

If someone has social anxiety or Autism or even is just shy, it's very difficult to go out and meet people and make friends.

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Today, my boyfriend told me to completely shave off all of my already-groomed pubic area because, "It looks so unnatural." Ignoring the obvious lack of logic, I asked him why he keeps his totally ungroomed. Turns out "Men having hair is okay. Women aren't supposed to, though." FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 083

You deserved it 13 428

Today, my wife waited until we’d been married for two weeks to tell me she has a mountain of credit card debt that she’s been hiding from me. This explains why she insisted the mortgage and car be in my name, her credit score is so low that it’s almost a double digit FML

I agree, your life sucks 509

You deserved it 140

The Top

Today, I put up my profile pic in Call of Duty: Mobile for the first time and got more than 50 friend requests and some very offensive messages from creepy guys. FML

I agree, your life sucks 931

You deserved it 281

Today, I thought it would be funny to touch my girlfriend's back with my cold hands. She thought it would be funny to crush my left testicle with her knee as I was trying to fall asleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 291

You deserved it 40 629

Today, I went down on my girlfriend for the first time. The words "Christ, Jeff. It's a vagina, not a burrito. CALM DOWN!" were spoken. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 658

You deserved it 14 019

Today, I received my first ever hand-job. It would have been great if she didn't wipe it across my face when I had finished and storm out of the room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 759

You deserved it 6 583

Today, I was walking down the street when someone started yelling at me, saying I was dead. I bolted, ran into a pole and when they caught up to me, said "Oh, wrong person." and walked off, leaving me bruised on the ground. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 076

You deserved it 2 705

Today, I was at the mall and someone peeked their head under the door of my dressing room while I was half dressed. Not knowing who it was, I kicked him in the face just out of instinct. Its was a 4 year old kid looking for his mother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 815

You deserved it 23 502

Same thing different taste

Forever alone man

Help! I need somebody! Anybody!

Talk to me

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