Today, everyone at the office was finally presented with the bonuses our boss had promised to pay us by the end of last year. Turns out he was never authorized to promise any such thing, so he ended up just giving us signed "thank you" letters instead. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, after months of busting our asses and working round the clock on our latest project, I and the whole office just got bad news: when our boss promised extremely generous bonuses for doing all this, he was point-blank lying, and intended to take credit for our work all along. FML
Today, I discovered that as thanks for my successful efforts to increase my company's monthly revenue, my dumbass of a boss has been awarded a pay bonus. He's wasted no time telling everyone about the sports car he's planning to buy with it. FML
Today, my boss decided that a mug and a public 'thank you' were a sufficient substitute for a Christmas bonus. FML
Today, my boss complained about how his performance bonus is too small, as he expected it to be the total amount accrued rather than a percentage. He also made the decision to not give any of the employees profit sharing this year, because the company didn't beat the budgeted increase in profits. FML
Today, my boss came to my cubicle to give me my annual performance bonus. I was asleep at my desk. FML
Today, I was notified that the company did not give me a raise two months ago like I thought. The increase was a typo. Two months ago I wrote a thank you for the raise email to my boss. Now I get to write a check to the company to pay back my "raise." FML
Today, I got a lot of tips at work, but little did I know our boss takes it out of our paychecks. FML
Today, my coworker got a raise by making our boss give me a pay cut for doing his job while he was slacking off. As we were heading home for the day, he found $100. FML
Today, my manager did that thing where he gave me a performance-based bonus last month, but deducted the bonus from this months pay. He didn’t even try to hide it, it said in plain English "Amount deducted for previous performance bonus." FML
Today, my boss said he was giving me a significant raise. After he requested the payroll department to raise my salary they informed him he needed to fill out a one-sheet form. He took my raise away because he didn't want to fill the sheet out. FML
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Top comments
gracehi 33
For his birthday, get him a picture of a gift card to his favorite restaurant. :P
Faff 20
Is your boss Michael Scott?
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Comments (52)
Crofty92 17
My company made £200m profit last year and all I got was a shitty box of chocolates.
LowExpectations 30
Looks like you did better than OP then. My company does the same shit though. They cut my pay but offer free lunches. ******* bastards.
asparagus12 21
This is like "Chevy Chase Christmas Vacation!"
asparagus12 21
I love when a movie can tie into real life!
clrichmond2009 24
Glad I'm not the only one thinking of Christmas Vacation!
cwaziemamma 16
Boy... It sounds like CVS to me :/
lulinator 40
Frame it. Maybe his signature will be worth something someday, like for being The Ultimate Douchebag.
hottentot15 4
Sounds like an episode of the Office when Michael fakes out everyone with his empty promises.
outoftown 27
I hope your company has a "rate the boss" segment in his next performance appraisal.
wvcheesehead 13
Go over his head, he may well have been authorized, but they are making him a scapegoat, if you find out who screwed you, tie them to a tree and pour honey on his nuts.... and wait for nature to visit.
ladybugz23 13
tsk tsk lousy boss
alicat13 12
time to find a dark alley way and a baseball bat :-)
Axipiter 24
I love the smiley face at the end! It makes it seem like this is NOT the start of some devious and sinister plot... Muwahaha!
fatimakhanxo 8
starting to sound a lot like the office! LOL