Today, during dinner, my daughter rudely cut into my conversation and gushed that she's "like, totally" going to audition for a reality TV show next year, after I pay her way. Five minutes into her jaw-dropping stupidity, I had to physically restrain myself from slapping her out of her chair. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Same thing different taste
Today, I told my daughter that she wasn't allowed to eat in her room, so she sat at the table and glared at me for 10 minutes while she ate. She's 15. FML
Today, my daughter is still acting out her teenage issues. This morning, when I told her to, "Have a nice day" she screamed at me, "DON'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO!" FML
Stop that now
Today, I saw my 4 year-old daughter singing and dancing, so I decided to sing along. As soon as I started singing she said, without blinking her eyes and super calmly, "Could you please stop doing that?" FML
Got talent?
Today, I told my mom that I want to try out for a singing competition on TV, so I might be able to kick off my musical career. She convinced me to sing a song for her, so I did. Mid-way through, she lost it, burst into laughter, and told me to stay in school. FML
Mommy issues
Today, both of my daughters were having an argument because my youngest has decided that she doesn't want kids. I defended her decision and my oldest daughter told me to STFU and called me a hypocrite. I slapped her across the face for her disrespect and now she's threatening to press charges. FML
Today, after being fed up with my sarcastic, mouthy daughter, I decided to remove her TV from her room. I dropped it on my foot and broke two toes. She promptly said, "That's what you get." FML
MANNERS!
Today, my mother gave me a reprimand for my table manners when I didn't ask for someone to pass the vegetables I could have gotten myself. She then let out a raunchy fart at the table, and had the nerve to yell, "Did you ask to be excused?!" as I vacated the area. FML
Quite the demand
Today, my adult daughter reached out to me, asking to mend our relationship. I told her there would be nothing until she paid me back for what I spent raising her ungrateful self. In response, she laughed at me, said, "Never mind" and flipped me off as she walked out. FML
Grounded
Today, my sister commented that she wants to audition for The Voice and that she’s sure she’ll make it to the finals. I said, “You have to have raw talent to do so.” I realized the severity of my comment too late as she teared up and stormed out of the room. My mom took my Macbook and car keys away. FML
Today, my young daughter came up to me, grabbed my face and said, "I'm putting you in the garbage." When I laughed and asked why, she looked me dead in the eye and said, "You are trash." FML
Top comments
bestnameright 14
You raised her... Just saying
oj101 33
Faith in humanity -200 points.
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Comments (87)
ptoui 1
You... you had to... restrain yourself... PHYSICALLY?!!?!
FML_Elle 17
Is she going to audition for the reality TV show 16 and Pregnant?
Dukekamono 5
The apple doesn't fall far from the tree. Just saying.
akiahara 14
you raised her. also, why aren't you taking control of the situation? you know, being the adult?
bigmacswag101 2
You sound like a total ****.
FYL63 1
I hope it's her dinner chair, not wheelchair. Just didnt look right.
withasmile 3
I think, other than the interruption, this is a major over reaction. Kids want to do a lot of things and don't really know the consequences or cost. Just calmly tell her you aren't going to pay for it and why. Wanting to do a reality show isn't that big a deal. As far as the interruption - again you calmly say, excuse me, I was talking and resume your conversation. Then later on discuss manners with her. Slapping? I'm thinking you need some serious anger management unless there is more to this.
Tinuviel97005 0
Sounds like she's acting like a _seriously_ young child. So treat her that way. Give her a spanking now, it might not be too late after whatever neglect has led to this.
iHeartMuzik 0
I'd sign her ass into fear factor.
Pensu 12
This post made me seriously uncomfortable. If you want to physically harm your kid every time she says something stupid, I worry for her safety... Get some help.