Today, at the coffee shop where I work, my supervisor smelled "something weird, like sulfur." I spent the next ten minutes pretending to look for the source of the smell with her, rather than admit that it had come from me. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I farted in my office, assuming nobody would come in until the smoke cleared. The new girl then came in to introduce herself. She had her hands on her nose the whole time, while we both awkwardly tried to ignore the stank elephant in the room. FML
Today, I was alone at the office. Having held it in all day, I let out the longest, worst-smelling fart of my life. The owner of the company, investigating the odd noise, opened my office door. When the stench hit him, he walked backwards all the way to his office, staring at me, in silence. FML
Today, thinking that I was alone at work, I started rummaging through my nose, trying to find something interesting. It was only after about a minute that I noticed that my boss was looking straight at me. FML
Today, I was at a restaurant waiting for a table. Some lady walked by, smelling like BO and patchouli oil. I attempted to cover my nose with my sweatshirt, but I thumped a small girl in the process. FML
Today, I released a noxious, unforgiving fart in my cubicle not thinking anything of it. You know, one of those sulfurous clouds you get the morning after a few good beers. Moments later, my manager walks in to talk about work. It's 7:30 in the morning, no one else is around. FML
Today, while on lunch break, my fat, old co-worker walked into the break-room. I managed to block out his perverted heavy breathing, but had to leave when he began emitting a terrible odor that smelled like cheesy, sweaty molding feet. I barely held onto my lunch. FML
Today, after working alone in a room all day, I let a fart sneak out. Just then, my drop dead gorgeous boss and two new girls walked in. I could literally see them hit the stench and cringe. FML
Today, I was at work at a kiosk in the mall when I smelled something foul. I thought it was the weird dude who'd just walked by so I just carried on with my work. Minutes later, I looked to my right and there, lying on the floor a few feet from me, was a huge turd wrapped in toilet paper. FML
Today, a pipe leaked in the store I work at. I had to smell sordid waste for more than 8 hours. FML
Today, I went to the mall with some friends. We all kept smelling this god awful B.O. smell and had no idea where it was coming from. On the car ride home, we all figured out it was actually me. FML
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Top comments
justanotherbird 19
That's hilarious. My sister tried that, but I knew it was her.
Brittneyyyy 7
And I hate it when people hate people who are smarter than them. And to Kaity111, that is actually a good source of information. You should get used to dealing with people who are smarter than you, because you're going to run into them a lot.
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Comments (138)
iTaylor 0
that stinks. ... tehe
iFroFro 0
^ hot
persianjr1 7
^ loner
login6437 0
Agreed ^
jonathanpwns 0
all of the above?
CountryBoy1993 0
damn babe u hot enough give me a call 910 624 7470
forbes52 6
your a babe haha text me? 262 343 2676;)
mintcar 10
I worked with sulfur in Chem lab and the smell was incredibly horrific. How could your supervisor not notice that the disgusting smell of rotten eggs were coming from your end?
Trollz4daLULZ 2
FAKE! GIRLS DON'T FART!!! Anyway, OP, YDI for being a woman in the workplace. You belong in the kitchen, making sammiches for your man. Also, YDI for not bathing, since that has to be the source of the smell, since women do NOT fart.
ktrose 0
LOL!
lexi365 20
wow ummm thats not sexist....
princessNikki93 0
wow your an ass.!
satomi_ishida 0
51 - Lol, he's being sarcastic. I mean, just look at his name ;P
Shutuptroll 0
Troll4dalulz is back XD
Cinn_fml 23
Hey, Trollz, you're back! Either that or we've been frequenting different FMLs... :P
Trollz4daLULZ 2
#51: STFU and make me a sammich. #53: *you're Cinn: good to see you're still around. Where the hell is everyone?!
Cinn_fml 23
Well, Doc and Irish were posting further up, Perdix is still around, as are Nerds, Steph, Pendatik, Boppity and a few others... I don't think anyone disappeared. Who were you thinking of?
Trollz4daLULZ 2
All of the above. Maybe I'm blind. IDI for only skimming through.
BeRealz 0
Why do you think soaps, water was founded? To not kill peoples agony of smell, but to replace with a enjoyable smell of life..... Summary: Fuking learn how to take a real shower/bath. Well, wait wait. You should start with bathing, the longer you clean your self the better.
mintcar 10
How do you know that it wasn't a fart? Sheesh.
worldclass 0
For some reason I highly doubt washing her body makes her farts smell better. Nice try.
BeRealz 0
Doesn't say it was from fart. So pardon you ladies.
worldclass 0
Oh, sorry.. I forgot bodies smells like rotten eggs when not bathed frequently. You're right ;)
mintcar 10
You clearly missed my point. Does it say that it was from her lack of proper hygiene?
BeRealz 0
Mintcar, there is many parts of your body that can create highly smell. The op, did not explicit it out as a "fart." But from "her". So, it could be from her armpits, fart, feet, or period. I'm not saying "I'm right". Just saying that the OP did not explicit that it WAS directly from "fart".
mintcar 10
I didn't say it was from her fart. I asked how you knew for certain that it wasn't. You made a statement as if you knew exactly what caused her foul smell. There could be a number of possibilities but I highly doubt that poor hygiene smells like rotten eggs. ( If anyone ever smells like rotten eggs then it's probably due to a metabolic disorder not bad hygiene). Farts on the hand could smell like sulfur. This is why a fart could be a better assumption.
BeRealz 0
You say "as". Ok, thank you for admitting it. Yes, it is just a opinion. No difference from yours. It's still a opinion. No ones right in this case.
sourgirl101 29
If it was from B.O. then the boss could trace where the smell was coming from, don't you think? But a fart? one that last X amount of time to linger, seems like the better guess.(: BTW My farts, (that never happen)(: smell like cherry blossoms.(:
Lorysa 11
xD 15, Period blood doesn't smell anything like sulfur. If anything, it smells really metallic. Even if the OP has some amazingly rare disorder that makes her pits smell like a volcano instead of like normal BO that everyone else has, she probably wouldn't have been hired after the interview if that was the case... I'm just saying, it's pretty mean and assumptive to just say that she doesn't even wash herself... but maybe I'm being sensitive.
Iskaria 0
Ok BeRealz it was obviously implied that the OP farted, if it was coming directly from 'the OP the boss would, A) Have already noticed the smell as soon as they showed up for work, and B) Been able to tell it's the OP. Also I don't know how disgusting the people you know are, but I would worry if anyone (even if they hadn't bathed in months) smelled like rotten eggs, they would be ill. As for your comment on it potentially being period blood it is clear the only ****** you have ever been near is your mother's. In case you are confused this is me saying you're wrong!
BeRealz 0
100- Everyone has different reacts of body. Meaning some people can quickly increase smell under 3-2 days. Everyone has an unique body working function. Go ask your friends, and do a completion by not taking a shower for few days, perhaps you'd see the difference. Or better yet look up on Google.com and learn some more about hygiene. And, how can I assume it is "fart" if it only takes under few mins to resolve? Unless it was very secured room. The OP, explicitly said "10 mins". Fart smell lasts that long? I don't think so, not even in a widely public shop/store.
lucious1 0
lorysa- I've come across some pretty stank smelling girls when they are on their cycle( don't know if it's spelled right, it doesn't look it lol) your right tho it's mostly an iron smell...still yuck but ya.... and dude seriously you've never had hot farts??
Iskaria 0
The OP said they spent 10 minutes looking for the SOURCE of the smell not that it lingered for that long, and the smell of a fart is from tiny particles of shit floating about, so depending on the air flow, it could easily take it that long to dissipate, yes. As for the smell thing, it's a common reference for particularly bad farts to be likened to rotten eggs (the sulphur smell described) therefore it is probable and almost certainly what the OP is referring to. As the proverbial 'they' say, "When you hear hooves you think horses, not zebras."
fakeaccountX 6
*fart* *looks up from newspaper* What the hell was that?
SettoFail 9
gotta love family guy
MermaidSongXOXO 6
I call shenanigans! Girls don't fart.
My_Deathbed 0
true my girlfriend never farts.
Herox 0
uuum... what was it just tell us... was it your pussy?
Helloiloveyou199_fml 0
ew.
Person1233 13
The people who don't realize that the OP farted must not be human...
Shorty_Shaza 5
is it not spelt 'sulphur'??
worldclass 0
Both are correct!
persianjr1 7
hahaha
Zebidee 9
Wow - you've managed to disprove my theory that British English speakers know both versions of words and that it's only American English speakers that call people out incorrectly. Cheers - thanks for that.