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By me - / Wednesday 15 July 2009 08:02 / United States
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Hopefully she was just joking? And, I mean, it was 3am, she was probably out of it anyway. No worries, you did the right thing and it's good that you're not letting her come into your own bed when those things happen because then they'll do it all the time. That's how it was with my brothers, atleast.

If she's serious, then she's clearly not cut out for parenthood - certainly not adoption. She's your DAUGHTER, and the fact you adopted shouldn't make a difference - your wife should understand, and shouldn't even be able to CONSIDER that. You should leave her, both because she doesn't appreciate and understand you AT ALL, and because she clearly doesn't feel the same way as you do about the adoption.

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# 33, I wouldn't say divorce her over that, seriously. We don't know the whole situation. The wife could have woken up and not known he was there because the daughter had a nightmare and was comforting her. She could have seen it as him sitting there while she's asleep (if the daughter had fallen asleep or looked like it). But I'm sure they've talked it out and she understands. However if she knew all that and still called the guy a pervert... Yeah thats not right at all. FYL. You did nothin

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Humorizer, adopted children BECOME your children, that's the whole point of adoption. On the other hand, pedophiles don't care AT ALL whether they're related or not to the children. The majority of cases of child abuse by pedophiles happens by the father or the uncle or other close relative. So your point makes no sense. He's not anymore likely to be a pervert because he's not related to him. The girl is 3 for crap's sake, whether they're related or not has nothing to do with anything an

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It IS their kid...not biologically, but they adopted her. Essentially, she is theirs, and it just means that her life is even more stressful than most three-year-olds, so the fact that he wants to be there for her is even more important.

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There's a good bit of paranoia in any new relationship. Since he said adopted daughter, and not just daughter, and she's only 3, I would have to assume that they haven't been together all that long. The wife obviously likes him, or the marriage and adoption would have never happened. Still, it's her daughter, and she should have a healthy bit of paranoia and want to protect her little girl. I was accused of a few things with my wife's son. Mostly it was "you don't like him", w

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yeah seriously, what the fuck is wrong with the wife? i mean if he was sitting there taking pictures of the girl then i would say, but even if she didn't know it was a nightmare...having a step-parent be nice enough to sit with the daughter for ANY reason is a good sign.

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I'm going to go ahead and assume that you aren't adopted, or know anyone that was adopted. I've never met anyone that adopted a child and didn't think of that child as THEIRS. Yes, bad shit happens, but its uncommon in the grand scheme of things. If an adoptive parent is going to do things to their child, they would have done it to their own flesh and blood. It has nothing to do with it not being "his" kid.

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...really? I'm pretty sure the "it's not their kid" comment was a joke. like, "lol adoption". clearly when you adopt a child it becomes your child etc etc. jeeeeeeez

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#73 - of course divorce is a drastic step, and he owes the kid a family, now that he has adopted her. However calling him a pervert just for comforting his daughter is a drastic accusation. It indicates an almost complete absence of trust, quite possibly some paranoia, too. Sure the OP should try to work it out first, but if that doesn't get satisfactory results he should seriously consider divorce. Such an accusation is quite dangerous. It could destroy his reputation, his career, his relati

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Completely agreed... Feeling safe as a child is very important, because otherwise they'll be scared of the dark longer and mor problems will arise from that.

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Humorizer: I'm an adoptee, and just because the child is adopted, it doesn't mean they're not the adoptive parents' "real" child. Pushing a baby out of your fucking vagina doesn't make you a parent. Any bitch can go out and get knocked up. It takes a real parent to raise and care for the child.

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what is your problem people. there are people who said shit about the daughter being adopted and there are ppl who write a fucking long comment about adoption, seriously. we don't need fucking 4 paragraph long comments about adoption.

Hopefully she was just joking? And, I mean, it was 3am, she was probably out of it anyway. No worries, you did the right thing and it's good that you're not letting her come into your own bed when those things happen because then they'll do it all the time. That's how it was with my brothers, atleast.

If she's serious, then she's clearly not cut out for parenthood - certainly not adoption. She's your DAUGHTER, and the fact you adopted shouldn't make a difference - your wife should understand, and shouldn't even be able to CONSIDER that. You should leave her, both because she doesn't appreciate and understand you AT ALL, and because she clearly doesn't feel the same way as you do about the adoption.

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Well, the advice to leave her is a bit over the top I think. This is just one incident, and I don't think that's reason enough to get a divorce. But she's still a crazy paranoid bitch. Since when does being a good father make you a pedophile? Oh god he loves our daughter therefore HE MUST BE A PEDOPHILE! Cause that's what pedophiles do, right? Loving their kids and comforting them and making sure they sleep well? D: Anyway, better have a good talk with her in the morning, she seems to have

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@ambrosia Coming from an 18 year old girl I think that you may need to stop calling the kettle black hun. Anyways, it's not one of those terms that you use with someone you love. She called him a perv at 3 in teh morning under her own assumptions that he was being a creeper while his adopted daughter slept. Regardless of the past, present or future, that kind of negative, over-the-top comment can mean a lot. Basically the OPs wife thinks that her husband is a creepy perv who is watching his a

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Advice to leave her is certainly over the top. However, assuming it was said seriously, OP does need to confront her about it, and make her know that this sort of accusation is unreasonable and unacceptable, and that it can't happen again. This doesn't have to be a horrible confrontational argument, just a simple explanation of why the accusation was so stupid and why it's not acceptable should be enough. IMO too many people in relationships try to ignore unreasonable outbursts in the hopes t

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Whoa, ambrosia, someone's feeling a bit vindictive this afternoon, eh? It's kind of contradictory to ask someone to "refrain from talking down to [you] and using that language" when they called you hun, and then turn around and do the exact same thing. I understand it was purely out of spite, but then to call nomad "immature"? It's laughable. You're the only person I see "explod[ing] at the situation" here. Also, I agree that you were calling the kettle black

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ambrosia was not being vindictive. THIS is being vindictive: -i shit on your dead -a thousand dicks in your religion -a dick in your mothers rib cage -i wipe sweat off my balls and flick it in your general direction -suck butter from my ass -i put plastic wrap over your mothers face and shit on it -may you be struck by a dick -your mother sucks bears in the forest -i urinate on your grandparents -fuck the 18 generations of your ancestors -let the rats ejaculate on you -the pope fuc

I can't stand those type of women who think that whatever a man does, he is a perv, especially without even asking him what he was doing. Just ready to accuse, doesn't think of asking questions. What a bitch. FYL for marrying her.

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I agree...I kind of think this is fake too. Most reasonable women would not just call their husbands perverts without first trying to find out a little more about the situation. In fact, I think most mothers would be concerned as to why their husbands were up at 3 am tending to a child (i.e. "Is she alright?" "Did something happen?").

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Most reasonable women? There are no such people she is loony and he should run far and fast. Get a divorce as soon as possible cause all she is going to do is gossip about it and someone will call either welfare service and or police regardless of what he says he will be branded as having been arrested on sodomy

= She sounds like this woman my dad dated. She accused my dad of being a pervert twice. One time she did it I was 9, we were on an airplane, and I was just sitting on my dad's lap and we were looking out the window below us. Yes, she accused my dad of 'touching me wrong' and called him a child molester because he let me sit on his lap. I think her and your wife would get along well. = FYL

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That's messed up. I still sit on my dad's lap, and I'm in highschool! I think its funny and sweet. He gives me hugs when I do it. Nothing wrong with sitting on someone's lap.

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Either the paranoid woman was molested when she was a kid, or she's one of those products of the modern society who's never been around kids and thinks anything is pedophilia. "Oh, you looked at that child and smiled!! You sick degenerate!!"-type of people, like the OP's wife. The onslaught of BS news and paranoia over pedophilia, via the TV and the internet, does that to people a lot. It's a horribly serious subject, and idiots getting paranoid over normal people not being perve

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My dad's girlfriend does that. She thinks because I'm his step daughter he shouldn't have anything to do with me because him and my mom are divorced. Even though I don't know my real dad and he raised me since I was two and I consider him my real dad and he thinks of me as his real daughter. Anytime I'm around him or he hugs me she is always telling my mom that he's doing inappropriate things with me. Of course my mom doesn't believe this.

Your a really good dad to do that for your daughter. Just ignore your wife-it wuz 3 am, she wuz prbly too tired. I wish my dad has been like that-your daughter will really approciate it.

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