By Anonymous - 13/12/2011 14:00 - Malaysia

Today, as part of my job as a performer, I had to show off my skills with a switchblade in front of an audience. A kid shot a rubber band at me. I then needed stitches. FML
I agree, your life sucks 32 119
You deserved it 3 131

Same thing different taste

Top comments

txgirl2013 14

Show your switch blade skills on his face.

GhettoXmuffin 7

This is why I'm not having kids


Haha looks like you won't be performing for a while

Torva_fml 16

Of coarse he will.. Performers Gota perform.

FYL OP some kids are assholes but someday they'll meet karma. Anyway some chicks dig scars ;) so there is always an upside.

coolboy675 16

I used to show off my switch blade skills, but then I took a rubber band to the face.

Should have rushed him with the knife screaming "is that funny!!!!????" and made him shit his pants.

jennyvieve 8

I thought it said a kid threw a rubber at me lol

73 where did that come from? I cannot see why you are so upset at this man for entertaining people with the gifts he has been given.

What's so funny #1? I doubt you would chuckle and giggle in the same predicament. Don't believe me? Let's experiment!

Alexunited1212 2

24- all these Skyrim jokes almost make you wish for a nuclear winter...

85- Unfortunately he appears to have Repressed Angry Nerd with a Superiority Complex Syndrome.

ImFrackinBored 13

Switchblade or butterfly knife? I don't quite understand how you can perform skills with a switchblade as theres only a safety mech, a lock, and the button to release the spring... Either way it's never fun cutting into a finger :(

txgirl2013 14

Show your switch blade skills on his face.

"For my next performance I'll show you how to properly throw knives. I've got a special guest here with me..."

"Do you wanna know how I got these scars!"

The last time I decided to show off my switchblade skills, I got a MOAB >_>

ninjuh_wingman 29

That kid is the most awesome shot ever.

I'm sure when the kid's mom told the father she finally got pregnant he said the same thing..

4, probably thinks that the rubber band was shot so well that when it hit OP, OP started bleeding profusely

GhettoXmuffin 7

This is why I'm not having kids

yumlicious 4

I'm pretty sure 1 person abstaining from parenthood will not cause extinction upon an entire race. But what do I do know?

#38, if you're so concerned, why don't you pick up #5's slack? I'm sure you'll have a ball.

7 billion... That's the world population. Pretty sure we could do without.

Why? You know what a little shit you were? ;)

Dflips 0

Well you dont know how to spell haha

sinking_fish 12

Im pretty sure the world could deal with a couple less "ghetto muffins" in the world.

yumlicious 4

We do not need any more "sinking fish" either.

fricknugget 3

hahaha my friend told me he'd rather have aids than have kids

damn kids and their hippity hop and their rock music lol.

Damn kids w they're books with faces own' 'em.. mah'spaces.. tweeter's and twahter's! Listenin' to little weezer's, whacker flacker's and wizard khalifer's! They stank and ah' hate 'em!

Why can't we all get along? beside it's those kids with that rap music that's the worse!

Damn kids with their fuckity ****** comments

NoNameAtAll_fml 1

Damn kids with their damn flying machines, glow boxes, and roller boards

28 - You shouldn't judge people by the genre of music they listen to. I'm a fan of rap and hip hop, doesn't make me a bad person. I'm actually really shy and do well in school. Don't judge a book by its cover, common sense.

28- I listen to rap and hip hop all the time but I'm still normal. Just because you listen to a genre of music doesn't make you the devil personified.

Sorry graham but no1 with that picture is normal

1221jamw 11

Sorry Elementalz, but anybody that fails to spell out "No one," isn't normal.

Now that's what I call a show, the audience must have been intrigued!

bizarre_ftw 21

The injuring incident immensely intrigued the audience? Alliteration?

brick_man33 14

must have been a hell of a show.

You dont know who i am but i know where you live. By Dale Gribble.

Heeeerroin 5

It seems as though your ninja skills need a little work if a rubber band messed up your focus that badly..

FYLDeep 25

At least he didn't shoot an arrow at your knee.

D37H100 5

I use to be an arrow, but then i took a Chuck Norris to the knee

FYLDeep 25

I'm sorry, but I don't feel like you were taking me seriously. This is a real problem. A lot of people have been taking arrows to the knee lately.

I don't think the 'arrow to the knee' jokes are funny. At all.

FYLDeep 25

You think this is a joke? Have you no heart?

I don't think the "Arrow to the knee" meme is even remotely funny, either.

Shut up, Makarov! You killed Soap, you bastard! :P

I used to be an adventurous arrow but then i got stuck in a knee.

I used to be able to do switchblade tricks, but then I took a rubber band to the knee.

CaptainTwiggy 0

29 is just bitter after taking an arrow to the knee.