Today, as I was out walking, one homeless man sitting with two others asked me for something to eat. Trying to do a good deed, I bought the three men a bag of apples. They then fought viciously over them before the first man chased me for handing them to "the wrong one." FML
Collection
Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Same thing different taste
Today, a homeless man asked me for some money to eat. He ate the five dollars I gave him. FML
Today, I was at the park when I saw a homeless man. I gave him my sandwich, since he needed it more than me. Seconds later, he was attacked by a flock of birds. FML
Today, I decided to help the homeless by giving them old clothes and food. In return, they decided to mug me. FML
Today, I realized that I'm a terrible human being. For the first time in my life, I gave some change to a homeless guy, but only so he'd get out of my face long enough for me to watch two other bums beating the crap out of each other over a sandwich. FML
Today, trying to do a good deed, I gave a homeless guy a $10 bill. As I walked away, he yelled after me, "You fucking bitch!" FML
Today, I was outside, eating a sandwich, when I noticed a homeless man was standing in front of me. Upon making eye contact, he grabbed the rest of my sandwich and ran off. FML
Today, while volunteering to feed the homeless, one of them asked me to follow him to his car where he had a knife and bottle so he could "bottle up my blood". FML
Today, I was walking home, when I saw a homeless man trying to tear the wallet out of another guy's hand. I can't stand bums, so I smacked him across the jaw. That's when the other one kneed me in the balls and made off with my wallet as well. FML
Today, I was sitting in the park eating a sandwich, when a homeless guy asked me for some spare change. I said I didn't have any. He offered an "erotic striptease" in exchange for my sandwich. I said no. He gave one anyway. I walked back to work on an empty stomach. FML
Today, I cut my nice and tasty home-made sandwich in half to give to a homeless man. He tasted it, pulled an unimpressed face, and then stuck it in his pocket. FML
Top comments
doc_j 0
yeah i got nothin funny for this one. op that sucks man. wait WTF who buys someone a bag of apples?
killgrace666 0
haha that would have been an interesting sight
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Comments (138)
MrGold 0
Bum fights FTW!
loski87 4
lol!!
bubblekitty 1
oh wow. u should of gotten them some sandwiches. omg is sunny outside btw :)
iRiS890 5
Lucky you! It's been raining all morning here and we are on a tornado watch.
bubblekitty 1
I'm sorry :(
iRiS890 5
I always feel bad for the homeless man I pass daily because he has the cutest dog ever. I take him a bag of dog food weekly hoping he'll just let me take him home. The dog, not the guy.
cptmorgan15 2
Sorry, it's a package deal. That's why he has the dog. Everyday he wakes up hoping he'll trick someone.
iRiS890 5
And that is exactly why the dog will be staying with him. He's slightly creepy and I fell like that would be the most awkward car ride ever lol.
docscientist 10
Why would he give you the dog? It probably provides him companionship. If you're just feeding the dog hoping to take it home, just stop.
iRiS890 5
I'm feeding the dog because it's too cute to let starve... and because I want it. So I can help them out and work on my ulterior motives. WIN WIN.
riax 9
Snatch the doggy away while the hobo sleeps >:D sometimes I wonder whether hobos deserve a dog when they can't even look after themselves.. Anyway, that's really nice of you!~
noodle93 0
Dang :(
pinkchocolatex3 0
How cute (:
kaynorr 9
sounds like a big bag of fun
musicfreak9821 6
seems selfish, but I'd usually say, "sorry, no money." lol
UnknwnClassicGrl 5
This made me laugh. At least he didn't threw apples at you! Btw, love this new FML upgrade for my iPhone. :)
ugliness 6
I like the old version better :( I don't like the bright blue Borders >_<
UnknwnClassicGrl 5
I don't know why all these apps use blue? Like twitter, facebook, myspace etc. FML is too cool for that, they should use another color. :)
jenaandtyler4eva 0
homeless people have no respect for anyone else but themselves and I think they should be 100% grateful for anything they get
Grimmerie 31
i was once homeless for a few months. that was really fun. i was called names, spat on, beaten up, chased, stolen from, stained with food and scalding hot coffee, arrested (for no reason), and nine times out of ten i starved. we don't hang around begging to ruin your day. most homeless people i know are pleasant and have no control over their situation. there is the occasional douchenozzle, but for the most part they are mentally handicapped. think before you post. homelessness is a terrible thing.
jenaandtyler4eva 0
I'm sorry didn't mean to offend anyone
iRiS890 5
I'm pretty positive that they are grateful for any help they receive and I've seen the homeless show more compassion to those around them than most people.
docscientist 10
You think homes and jobs are magically available for everyone? That was a really thoughtless comment.
flickyourbic1223 7
There is a homeless couple in my old town. I was a waitress and they would come to Denny's and stay for hours. I never charged them for their drinks and if I hadn't used my employee meal I would discount their food and eat from the $2 menu myself. She would always complain that her coffee was cold and refuse to pay for it anyway but he was never rude. 9 times out of 10 someone would pull me aside and pick up their check. Once in a while us waitresses would put 1 or 2 cigarettes aside and leave the box on the table. Never so much as a thank you and even worse she would give the meanest looks. I have even personally bought them a pack of cigarettes. They began to expect certain things. One time I had to cover their tab because they got used to people taking care of them. So call me selfish but I'm burnt out on helping the homeless.
usnwife 18
The town I live in has tons of people begging, and I've never felt bad. I know for a fact there are shelters here that will feed them, give them a place to sleep, and help them find jobs and get back on their feet, but they prefer to sit and beg, using a wheelchair or crutches they don't need (I've seen them get up and walk away with no problem) to get sympathy. Sorry, not with my money. I've also know someone to go buy a meal for a homeless person, they looked at it in disgust and threw it in the trash - all they wanted was money for drugs. It's sad, I know there are some out there that can really use the help, but there are too many lying thieves just out for the money for me to be able to trust any homeless person anymore :/
soiheardyoufaile 4
How'dya like them apples?!
VandalHeartX 0
You just went there. That just happened. I don't know wether to be impressed that you actually said that or bewildered why nobody else did before you.