Today, as a pizza delivery guy, I was forced to see yet another naked 200 pound teenage girl with a serious case of body acne. They're starting to give me nightmares. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, I had to deliver pizza to a nudist colony. I got an eyeful of more than I needed to see. FML
Today, the pizza delivery guy saw me in my underwear. My boyfriend is so ashamed of me that he pointed out to the guy twice that we were just roommates. FML
Today, on my first day at my new job delivering pizzas, I got bit by a guy dressed as Dracula. FML
White knight, wrong place
Today, I dropped in on my wife at her part time waitressing job. As I was leaving, I gave her tushie a playful squeeze. I was then tackled by some acne-ridden teenage blockhead trying to impress the hot waitress by beating up the guy groping her. FML
Today, I realized that the only boy that shows up at my door is the pizza boy. FML
Like the beginning of a porno
Today, my girlfriends dared me to answer the door naked to the cute pizza delivery guy. He laughed it off and thanked me for the awesome tip. An hour later, police arrived because my nosy, frigid, couldn’t-get-laid-in-a-brothel neighbour reported me for public indecency. FML
Loose connections
Today, the pizza delivery guy and I know more about each other than me and my family ever have. FML
Today, I was delivering packages as usual for work. I was dropping off a large letter to a hot girl. Before I turned to leave the girl opened her mouth to say something. Instead, she just vomited all over me. Her letter was my first delivery of the day. I had to finish my job covered in puke. FML
Today, I was working at a day care center. A 5 year old boy came up to me telling me he wanted to eat my face. Confused, I asked him why. He said, "Because your face looks like pizza." FML
Nice try, Karen
Today, as a pizza delivery driver, I delivered to a customer with young kids. She gave the pizzas to one of her kids to take inside, where the kid dropped them and it went everywhere. She then rang the store and claimed that I'd dropped the pizzas, then told her to "suck it up." FML
Top comments
Huey_Freeman 4
Maybe they're watching too many pornos and expect you to deliver an extra large "sausage" pizza...
gc327072 31
It's not delivery, it's a porno.
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Comments (211)
punkrockess 7
Maybe she is comfortable in her skin & doesn't give a shit what some $2 an hour delivery guy thinks?
donut_gurl 8
she does have the right to be naked in her house, although she should throw on a robe to answer the door, but who are you to judge her anyway? i bet if she was 120lbs with big boobs you wouldnt be complaining would you?
BadAssBandit897 9
I hate how people are all "OMG YOU ARE SO MEAN HOW COULD YOU SAY THAT?!" People...fat people are fat, it's no one else's fault but their own. Sometimes people don't enjoy the sight of pimples and stretch marks, especially in a combo. Maybe if they got a little tough love and THE TRUTH, it may inspire them to change their lives... Get over yourselves -.-
sulitak 27
and a majority of the time people who say this have no ******* clue what they are talking about.
BIGxJOSH 5
At least your getting some action
pregnantpianist 2
Hell. It could be worse. They could be covered in stretch marks and not have nice, big perky tata's anymore because they had a baby. Oh wait...that's me. Fvck. :/
howrudoin 11
That's weird because in my pizza delivering days i saw a girl like that, I can't believe she's still alive. she was always in the background munching down the pizza box while her hot roommate offered up some ass.
FalconSam1414 19
What kind of town do you live in where you've seen this more than twice!?
zander4310 5
Great now I might get nightmares now.....
nico16_fml 6
Dont worry it's not delivery it's delissio
pdp_fml 21
These kinds of girls need to start wearing some clothes! What a sight to see. Maybe you can get a better job.