Today, after working my shift at McDonalds, I went to clock in at my dispatch job. During a 911 call, I blurted, "Would you like to try the McRib while it's back?" FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, as usual, I worked at McDonald's. Although I tried to diffuse the situation, an old man was absolutely furious, and punched me in the face over BBQ sauce. FML
Today, I was working the drive-through at McDonald's. I greeted a customer with a, "Hi, how are you doing today?" His response: "Better than you." FML
Today, while I was working at McDonald's, a man and his wife ordered a Sundae. I gave the guy his sundae and realized I'd forgotten something. I said, "One second sir. Let me grab your nuts." I realized what I said when his wife gave me the death glare. FML
Today, after a long, horrible day at work and some fighting with my family and my girlfriend, I decided to cheer myself up by going to McDonald's for a change. I burst into tears when the cashier told me they couldn't make me a Mars McFlurry because they'd run out of ingredients. FML
Today, I tried to flirt with the cute cashier at my usual drive-thru. Instead of saying, "Thank you," I panicked and said, "I love you." Now I have to find a new favorite burger place. FML
Today, I ordered food at McDonald's. I'm on crutches, and a guy offered to carry my tray to the table. He rushed out with my food. FML
Today, while trying to quit my horrible job at a pizza place, I got so nervous that I accidentally offered to work double my usual hours for another month. FML
Today, I was at McDonald's. As I left the counter with the food, I heard the cashier mutter, "Fat ass." I turned around and demanded to see the manager. Once he came and heard the situation, he looked at me and said, "Well, it's not like he's wrong, right?" FML
Today, I was sitting in McDonald's. A lady came up to me and started complaining about the bad service, and asked for the manager. I told her that I didn't work there. "But you must, someone that fat has to work here!" FML
Today, my mom thought it would be a good idea for me to talk with a British accent during my job interview to make me sound smarter. I'm applying for a job at McDonald's. FML
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Top comments
nikkon416 13
Was the caller having a heart attack?
shaytards_fml 9
it's back????
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Comments (95)
BAD2891 4
WHOA WHOA WHOA WAIT!!!! IS THE MCRIB REALLY BACK??????????????
twelve_oh_seven 11
Yes
toxicfishwaffle 3
I bet they were just DYING for a McRib.
JMichael 26
And try our new McSlushie? It'll put a smile on your face.
perdix 31
Sounds like you were trying to drum up business for both. Does 911 dispatch EMS for explosive diarrhea?
WellThatSucked89 13
I am sure at some point this has been discussed, but perdix... what does your profile picture mean?
beaverteaser 16
why yes, yes i would actually
weveallbeenthere 30
working 2 jobs sucks. hopefully you have a good boss at 911 who understands.
Dkman 11
And think about it. All 911 calls are recorded that delightful slip will be in dispatch history op. it's nothin to be ashamed of
smokecloud_ 37
It could wind up on TV!
buckdharma 38
The subject's skin is hash brown, and he has entered cardiac arrest. We need a Mickey D-fibrillator, and a McRib spreader. Administer 50cc's honey mustard sauce and get Dr. Pepper en route on the McDouble.
WellThatSucked89 13
Comment of epic win! I bow to thee :)
harshallmeim69 9
IS YOUR NAME ACTUALLY BUCK DHARMA AFTER THE BLUE ÖYSTER CULT GUITARIST?
neighboxrhood 2
omg haha
skyeyez9 25
Best fml that I have read in awhile. Made me laugh out loud!