welp time to burn the car and the hair.

Don't do that, I think Charlotte was trying to write interview advice so the OP could get some needed help.

but Charlotte died. is she alive?? bu dum dum..

#30 SPOILER WARNING, JESUS CHRIST.

At least the spider found you very important!

Maybe the interviewers like spiders.

It was probably one of Charlotte's babies helping you get that job.

Maybe you can now save the world...if it bites you...then you will be really important...

Time to blow up your car and shave your head! Start a new fashion trend, you don't need hair! ;)

Did you get the job, or was the spider the only one able to accomplish anything in this story?

How did you not feel that? Haha ... Did you get the job??

Well that's one way to start the day...

And? I think I may have missed the point here.

OP is so unimportant and outdated that the spider started using them as a stationary point for its cobweb like a piece of neglected furniture. Unlike the furniture, though, OP is totally capable of moving forward and achieving bigger things, though I'm sure the spider was happy for at least the 15 miles he got to spend making his cobweb.