Today, after making out with this guy, our tongue piercings got stuck together. After about five minutes of trying to unlock them, I accidentally vomited a little in his mouth. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was about to make out with my boyfriend, so I quickly swallowed my gum. Moments later, I started choking on the gum, and ended up spitting it out into his face. FML
Today, I was watching a movie with my boyfriend, when things got a little frisky and we started making out. It was my first time French-kissing, and apparently he has a very sensitive gag reflex, because the moment my tongue went in, he started retching, and vomited moments later. FML
Today, I swallowed the piercing that I had bought for my tongue yesterday. FML
Today, I was making out with this guy when my nose started bleeding, and it got on his face. FML
Today, I kissed my girlfriend. She threw up in my mouth. FML
Today, I was making out with my boyfriend. It was going well until our braces got caught. Out of pain, I tried to pull away, which made my eyes water. Then I sneezed in his mouth. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling on the couch. He held a Kool Fruit in his teeth, and motioned for me to kiss him, so he could put it in my mouth. Just as he was about to do this, I inhaled. He then had to watch me dry retching, trying to get it back up. FML
Today, I was making out with a girl who I've had a crush on for a while now. It was all going fine until one of my teeth decided to dislodge itself. She promptly spat out the tooth and left. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling on the couch. Trying to be suave, he put a Kool-Fruit between his teeth and motioned for me to kiss him so he could put it in my mouth. Just as he was about to do so, I inhaled, swallowing it. He then had to watch me dry-retching as I tried to get it back up. FML
Today, I finally kissed the guy I really love at a party. He took me outside and immediately vomited. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
f_alltheirlives 3
I would have vomited right back, starting a cycle Family guy once portraided so beautifully
TC1_fml 0
Oh I already smell the YDI for having a piercing shitstorm incoming... :D FYL, could be worse though, there's plenty of stories 'bout tongue + clit. hood getting locked up etc. :P
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (169)
epicwinmaster 0
YDI for having tounge piercings, especially the guy. i have never met a straight man with a tounge piercing...
52fremont 0
and I've never met anyone who can call themselves an epicwinmaster when they can't even spell "tongue".
22jrdn55 15
lmao good point
caticaticati 3
I know a lot of straight guys with tongue piercings. In fact I think all the guys I know with tongue piercings are straight.
zack767 0
it wouldn't take 5 minutes to unlock them u would just unscrew to barbell
plexico 4
"after making out with this guy?" If your tongue piercings are locked, aren't you still making out?
losergirl 0
ew.
tonyoffice12 0
everyone here is soo full of bullshit this dis not happen amd be stuck for 5 minutes smells like bull shit to me idiots w
jane99 0
I have a tongue ring. This can't happen.
CheshireHalli 19
Because they're all the same, right?
lem0n_fml 0
so just because it's never happened to you means it's impossible, right? i have a tongue ring too and it's never happened personally but i've SEEN it happen before. although they managed to get unhooked after about 20 seconds.
jane99 0
you've 'SEEN' it happen? nice to know you watch other people make out.
lem0n_fml 0
well its not like a was staring at them. but they were in the room. and i look over and people are like UGGGGGGGH. you mean to tell me you've NEVER seen two people kiss? :
jane99 0
well, i'm not going to sit around in a room with people making out.
lem0n_fml 0
it's not like i sit around staring at people making out. i've just happened to be in the room and they started freaking out for a few seconds cuz they got stuck and clearly they're frustration caught my, as well as a few other people's, attention. i don't get why it's so shocking to you that OMG THERE ARE PEOPLE IN THE WORLD WHO WILL KISS EACH OTHER WHEN OTHER PEOPLE ARE AROUND, GROSS. seriously. grow up.
lololol111 0
ydi for making out with a guy with a tongue piercing, unless you have a dick.
amatayo 0
never got what the attraction was to piercings. on femeals there not hot and makes guys look gay. take offence if you want to. but it seems strange but I guess kids follow the crowd. I wonder if movie and music stars started to cut off toes for a rush would kids do the same. hmmmmmmmm
caticaticati 3
Actually I'm pretty sure piercings started as a way to stick OUT of the crowd (though they may be a trend now).
Emilyinroom483 7
Actually, I'm pretty sure piercings started thousands of years ago as body decoration.
caticaticati 3
Ah true. I was thinking the modern ones she's talking about that are kind of just for fun. But I stand corrected.
gelatinskeleton 0
Amatayo, while I do appreciate the effort you put into delivering that ridiculous generalization, as riddled with grammatical errors as it is, I feel it is necessary to point out the fact that you're an absolute moron. You may think you know everything, but you most definitely do not. In the future, try to keep your asinine opinions to yourself - if for no other reason than to avoid embarrassment.
fuckingshitt343 0
uhmm some people just enjoy piercings and tattoos and things. they aren't "following the crowd." kthx.
schuller22 0
yhis is true
ZevVeli 10
At least it wasn't a guy eating a girl out with a vaginal piercing and the piercings got stuck together.
ohmyword08 0
um, eww.