Today, after leaving a bar I fell asleep on the Q train heading home. I awoke at 5am in Coney Island, end of the line, to a cop poking me with his baton. He gave me a ticket for "Subway Vagrancy" even though I have a job and an apartment. He didn't ticket the homeless man next to me covered in piss. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I took the train home to save a few dollars on an Uber fare. I fell asleep on the train, got a fine for travelling outside of my paid zone, and had to take an even longer Uber home than it would have been from where I started. FML
Today, a homeless man asked me for money in a train station bathroom. When I told him I had no money he left. He then returned only to pour a bottle full of urine on my head while I was in the stall. I use a metro card. I honestly had no money. FML
Today, on the train, I was bitten by a homeless man. FML
Today, I walked into a subway car which was empty except for a sleeping hobo. Three stops later, the guy wakes up and starts peeing in the corner. I ignore it thinking he'll go back to sleep. Silly me, I didn't realize that he would start running towards me, still peeing. FML
Today, I woke up after I had gotten shitfaced, and tossed out of bars by bouncers several times. I even had pictures of my face circulated to other bars not to be served. I then met a woman I almost smoked crack with, and spent the rest of the night following her while she asked random homeless people for free crack. FML
Today, I fell asleep at my bus stop following a long day at work. I woke up to a homeless man giggling after he had clipped dozens of clothespins to my clothes, shoes, and hair in my sleep. FML
Today, I got a ticket for being drunk in public. I was walking a couple of blocks from the bar to my house, because I didn't want to drive drunk. FML
Today, my train was canceled so my ticket expired by the time another train arrived. I was fined $90 by ticket inspectors 'cause my claim that the early train didn't run was "unsubstantiated". Leaving the train I was pushed by the crowd, fell, lost a shoe and had to walk home with one bare foot. FML
Today, trying to get to work just off Eglinton station in Toronto, I slept in, didn't shower, and didn't have money for an Uber, so I jumped on the street car. This was the only time they had people checking tickets. One 200$ fine later, I'm late for work, and after a warning for my tardiness, I was sent home for "stinking." FML
Today, while walking to work, I saw a homeless guy with a funny "NEED MONEY 4 BOOZE" sign, so I gave him a few spare dollars for his humor. On my way back home, he was out cold on the sidewalk with several empty bottles beside him. Whoops. FML
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Top comments
condescending 0
sucks dude, but seriously, why would he ticket the homeless guy he has no money
brodizzle 0
Explain to a NY cop? lolol
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Comments (84)
fmah_life 0
Wait, homeless people, who are obviously really damn poor get ticketed for stuff like this? Disgusting.
ohnoitsdad109 0
ever think the cop might've ticketed you instead for a reason?
Dalarsco 0
Challenge the ticket in court.
pianodoctor 0
Really, FML for this? You fell asleed on the subway and they ticket the ppl who could actually pay the fines. Duh!! Next time just be glad you didn't get mugged and spare the rest us your heartless bulls**t
thaurfea 0
Probably because he knew the hobo couldn't pay the ticket, and you could.
sb_rph 0
and did you tell the asshole what actually happened and that the ticket should go to the homeless person? i mean really WTF? who gives a shit if they think a homeless person can't pay for it? technically they can...they hustle money all day long...they make at least $50 a day and spend it on friggin drugs and alcohol. so yes they CAN pay it off.
protooler31 0
honestly, why on earth would he ticket the homeless guy? he's got no money to pay it...waste of paper.
mikew85 0
Wow that sucks. The cop should've given you a warning.
mcpicklejar 0
the cop was probably trying to fill a quota
cmac86 24
wait, you can't put your feet up on the subway, you can't eat or drink on the subway, and you can't take it home when you're drunk? I don't live where there is a subway (aka the south) and I'm unfamiliar with these rules. why are they like this?