Animals: Today, after I moved into my college dorm three days ago, my...

By SMCHR - 09/05/2011 03:22 - Ireland

Today, after I moved into my college dorm three days ago, my roommate is still convinced that she is a cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 253

You deserved it 3 667

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 13/12/2011 13:57 - Norway

Today, my landlord came to my apartment because of complaints from my neighbors, saying that animals are not allowed inside. Turns out my roommate makes cat-noises when she's bored. My landlord still doesn't believe me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 211

You deserved it 2 357

Whoop-di-scoop-di-poop

By lindora - 14/09/2020 17:00 - Canada - Richmond Hill

Today, I counted 3 weeks since my new roommate scooped the poop out of her two cats' litter boxes. Also, she keeps rubbing in my face that she takes such good care of the cats, and I can only pretend to nod in agreement. There’s five more months on the lease. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 239

You deserved it 240

Cats 4 life

By Doggone it - 12/11/2022 12:00

Today, I've been living with my new roommate's dogs for three days now. In an ironic twist, the small one is very well-behaved, while the two big ones are disobedient little shits. Every day, I get a thousand more reminders as to why I'm a cat person. I can't do this anymore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 713

You deserved it 168

By roomie487 - 06/10/2009 21:08 - United Kingdom

Today, I met my new roommate. I also met her stuffed animals, who introduced themselves to me. My roommate makes inanimate objects talk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 223

You deserved it 4 335

Manchild

By beeee - 26/07/2010 04:03 - Australia

Today, I moved in with my boyfriend. Up until now, I thought my cat was the only four year-old I had to deal with. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 336

You deserved it 12 568

By peevedMcGee - 23/11/2018 17:30

Today, my cat pooped on the floor. After cleaning it up, I’m fairly certain it was not my cat but instead my roommate, who I also suspect is pooping in the litter box. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 930

You deserved it 224

Rampage

By emmalou - 16/09/2021 08:01

Today, my roommate is rampaging in the house at 1:00 a.m. because her stuff was moved out of the pantry for the new person, after being asked several times to move it herself. Apparently, she didn't see the text message heads-up, because she refuses to use her phone as a source of connection. FML

I agree, your life sucks 930

You deserved it 127

By SeeMeInTheDark - 07/12/2009 08:54 - United States

Today, I was doing homework in my room when my roommate started meowing all of a sudden. Not only was he meowing, he started to make loud cat noises that resembled a cat being run over by a car. He's gonna be my roommate for the rest of the year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 092

You deserved it 3 363

Anger issues

By Flash - 25/07/2021 17:31 - India - Bangalore

Today, I found out why my girlfriend has been angry with me ever since I moved in with her. Apparently, she is pissed that I taught her cat how to play fetch and keep treating him like a dog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 988

You deserved it 169

By Anonymous - 14/05/2014 20:43 - United States - Irmo

Today, I'm moving. While packing, I realized I hadn't seen my cat in a few hours. I called her and realized she was inside one of the hundreds of boxes in my house. I accidentally packed my cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 325

You deserved it 17 381

badbe 0

Monday 9 May 2011 8:36

that's kinda cute. pet her

BahahahLOL 0

Monday 9 May 2011 8:40

Well pretend to be a dog and run her the **** outta there.

Comments

beckham_732 3

Tuesday 14 June 2011 4:37

really?!? I love cats! 

Crncj 0

Friday 1 July 2011 4:44

my friend convinced herself that she is secretly a kitteh

steveakafranxy 7

Monday 11 July 2011 12:28

just give her some yarn and shell leave u alone

EriccaLuv 0

Thursday 14 July 2011 3:53

That's why you don't do drugs kids.

Bobby64 29

Tuesday 19 July 2011 15:49

Just make sure she uses her litter box. :o

metallicshadow 16

Friday 22 July 2011 20:06

rawr have some hot cat sex =P

FoxyVixen 4

Tuesday 26 July 2011 5:19

I bet she's just playing a trick on you! ...that sounds like fun... I might do that! =D

NeonBubblez 6

Thursday 25 August 2011 3:17

Wow. Have you told she's an actual human being, yet?

newburton13 26

Tuesday 28 February 2012 22:59

And that is when you call the local mental institution.

MrSmOkEwEeD451 2

Wednesday 25 April 2012 9:16

Only in Ireland (im from Ireland so this is not meant to be offensive.)

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I went out on a first date. He was funny, laidback, and handsome. We had an amazing time but I declined to go back to his house, not wanting to rush things. He said he understood and respected my choice. Later online he bragged about “banging some cheap slut for the price of a meal.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 720

You deserved it 185

Today, I accidentally fell asleep at work after working a 12-hour shift. Instead of waking me up, my coworkers spiked my coffee mug with whiskey and told my boss I was drunk. My boss wouldn't even listen to my side of the story and fired me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 705

You deserved it 2 991

The Top

Today, my dad, who lives hours away, called and told me he was getting married. Today. As in this evening. Guess I'm not invited. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 196

You deserved it 2 542

Today, I was fixing something for a guy at a steel manufacturing company. His employees told me that their boss can't hear properly, so I'd have to be loud when talking to him. When I'd finished, he asked me if I normally talked like that, or if there was something wrong with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 039

You deserved it 178

Today, I have blue lips because of a guy whose face I don't even remember didn't know the difference between kissing and sucking. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 252

You deserved it 26 178

Today, I was late for a video conference with my boss. As I frantically tried to fix my messy hair, my dog thought it was the perfect time to play fetch. I ended up joining the meeting with a squeaky toy in hand and an appearance that would make a scarecrow look put together. My boss found it hilarious, but I'm pretty sure my career aspirations are now in the doghouse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 337

You deserved it 512

Today, I was asked when my baby is due. My baby was due 6 months ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 870

You deserved it 4 624

Today, I left the hospital after having knee surgery. While trying to find my balance on my crutches, I was holding onto the roof of the car. My mum slammed the car door shut, not noticing my hand. I can barely even bend my fingers to hold onto my crutches. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 040

You deserved it 1 748