Today, after explaining to my two year old that we were going bra shopping, he decided to announce to the entire bank that we were going to buy Mommy some boobies. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Same thing different taste
Today, my 4 year old daughter walked in while I was changing my shirt. She said "When I get older I am going to have big boobies just like you." I'm her dad. FML
Today, I got out of the shower and my 3 year old sister comes into the bathroom and says "I want big boobies like yours when I grow up." And from the other room I hear my dad go "Sweetie, you've already got bigger boobs than your sister." FML
Today, I was holding my 3 year old brother, and apparently he thinks it's hilarious to pull my tank top down and scream ''BOOBS!'' in public. FML
It's not what you think
Today, I took my 4 year-old son to the bank with me. He asked why we were going, and I explained that I had a couple of checks that they would turn into money. When we got in line, he loudly exclaimed, "Mommy has checks for money!" Except "checks" sounded almost exactly like "sex." FML
Hello?
Today, I was trying on bras in a shop when a little kid stuck their head under my stall. I was completely topless and completely surprised when they asked if I was their mommy. I'm 16. FML
But he's only 5
Today, I was playing with my 5 year-old neighbor. I was changing and he saw me naked. Then he went home and his parents came over. Apparently, he told them that I have beautiful boobs. FML
Today, I went swimming. As I was getting out of the very crowded pool a little girl ran up to me pointed and yelled, "Mommy, I want big boobies like that when I grow up." I'm 16. I'm a boy. FML
Nice of her
Today, I was sitting on the couch with my 5 year-old on my lap. All of a sudden, she turned to me and said, "Daddy, I love your boobies. They're a good pillow." My own kid just called me fat. FML
Hereditary?
Today, my 4 year-old daughter was looking at a magazine cover with a well endowed model showing off her cleavage. She looked at me and said, "Mommy, when I grow up, will I have big round boobies like her or tiny pointy ones like you?" FML
Today, I went bra shopping with my mother. She insisted that I try on a bunch of push-up bras, and I told her I didn't want to, because it's false advertising. She looked at me and said that I need all the help I can get. FML
Top comments
Vamphyre73 12
Kids and their silly comments. But why would you even specify what type of shopping?
Damn_Hippster 11
Why would you tell your 2 year old that you were going to go bra shopping? He's only 2. He obviously doesn't understand.
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Comments (186)
Dadz_fml 0
Sounds like he knows what's up.
Carlie_McCartney 1
I agree with #2, but he's a kid. It's innocent. Most people probably disregarded it anyway :)
tylermt1999 17
i guess he gets the 'big picture';)
puppytaco64 8
What I want to know is how this kid knows the word boobies in the first place
Llamacod 11
Uhh, because the kid is 2. Does no one who comments "how does a 2year old know what a _____ is" even have kids? I'm thinking not, kids aren't retarded
puppytaco64 8
Maybe because most 2 yr olds can only say one syllable words
Llamacod 11
Uhh, puppytaco, why don't you work on your child development markers a bit. 2 year old can actually have complicated sentence structure. I have to presume that if the sentence quoted by mom is true then the 2 yr old is not an early 2 yr old but closer to 3. Just from seeing the development of my own kids
sabb1228 0
Ok Llama, just shut up man. All you're doing is attacking random people that you don't even know. Maybe he has kids. Maybe his kids can only say one syllable words. Maybe your children have a more complex sentence structure. Well woopty freaking do. I have a complex sentence structure. It's one of the most complex of the freshman at my school. Should my parents go around and attack and yell at other people asking why I can speak he way I do? No, so don't do it to other people. I'm tired of you ass holes who get on here only to try and hurt others.
s1ckpup 0
Boobies make me smile :-)
SpeshulK 0
My dad has a shirt that says that
chrissymari3 1
y would u tell ur son that??...
ashiebabie 0
That's something my little brother would do! He tells everyone everything
KVKdragon 26
This is when you pretend you're deaf and give no response to what he's saying. If he continues blabbing, tell him to be quiet and everyone within earshot will assume that he's trying to get everyone's attention over nothing.
taternuts 0
Grab some extra cash at the bank and buy a new kid. Your replacement 2 year old mime would never embarrass you like that chatty Kathy
grasshopper02 2
Why would you explain bras in detail to your two year old son? Seems weird, couldn't you just say clothes shopping?